Tuesday, March 21, 2017

WWE SD 3-21-17

The show begins with a recap of AJ and Shane before Bryan talks about Shane isn't like a regular McMahon - he sees this beating as a chance to set an example. AJ yammers for a while and says he'll wait for Shane tonight. Bryan makes Corbin-Orton for later. American Alpha vs. the Usos is pretty action packed and even gets a this is awesome chant. The Steiner bulldog only gets 2, but a superkick ends it and the Usos win the titles. Luke Harper rants for a bit and says scary things - he'll face Bray on SD next week. We get a Total Divas sendup with Miz as Cena and Maryse as Nikki mocking Cena for being so rule-centric and then says he'll "pop the question".

Baron vs. Orton is a pretty long, nothing match. Baron is not the guy to get an exciting match out of Randy. Dean shows up on a forklift to distract Baron, and the RKO ends it. Randy says stuff, but the lights go out and he's surrounded by guys dressed like Rowan. The Fashion Police come out with Tyler dressed like Nikki. Well, Tyler has no ass. Fandango is facing Cena and he has Nikki as backup. Double finishers to the heels and Cena wins. Not sure why TWO OTHER PEOPLE BEING IN THIS MATCH wasn't a DQ, but whatever. Every female brawls and Alexa stands tall. MizCena and Maryse mock Cena's Marine performance and Miz says he bought her a DIAMOND...Dallas Page Yoga DVD set! A car pulls up and AJ preps a beating, but it's Rhino and Heath. Shane comes out and AJ beats him up. Shane takes a nasty bump into the barricade, but Shane hits the flying elbow through the announce table.

Screens -

Sunday, March 19, 2017

WWF In Your House - Canadian Stampede

This is a legendary show in some ways, and certainly has an all-time great crowd reaction. Opening video shows Bulldog hitting a sickening chairshot to Mankind, in a spot I don't remember. So a lot of good that did his brain. Jerry, Vince, and Jim Ross are dressed as cowboys looking insane. HHH is out to start the show with his woman to take up 20 minutes of airtime - oh how some things don't change. We see KOTR clips with HHH hitting a nasty pedigree ONTO a table, but not quite through it, Mick taking a nasty bump off of a Chyna toss, and then having a septre broken on him.

Mick runs wild with punches and a legdrop. Cactus elbow hits. Ass over tea kettle bump by HHH. HHH goes for an outside in sunset flip, but eats a mandible claw. HHH tosses Mick into Chyna to hiptoss Mick's knee right into the steps. And Mick needs a new hip for some reason. HHH chopblocks him a few times before locking on a figure four. HHH goes up top and gets crotched. They brawl out in the crowd for a countout.

We see the Hart Foundation in a parade, some festivities, and some sweet Hart Foundation shirts. TAKA comes out and then The Great Sasuke comes out too. Sasuke's gear looks solid. Mick and HHH brawl around. LOL at the THIS IS WORKRATE sign in the background. King works hard to get this over while Vince does nothing to help this get over...how even more things never change. Lots of matwork to start things off with TAKA grinding Sasuke down. Sakuke locks on a half crab. GIANT backdrop over the top to TAKA leads to a missed flying karate kick off the top. Sasuke hits a series of round kicks to the chest before hitting a nice back spinkick to the face in the corner. Giant springboard dive to the floor by TAKA gets him over huge instantly. TAKA hits a nice belly to belly off an irish whip for 2. TAKA hits a jumping running knee in the corner before a springboard dropkick sends Sasuke outside. Michinoku driver hits for 2. Splash mountain and the tiger suplex get the win. Great super-short match.
 Mick and HHH keep brawling, now with a shovel and some beer kegs. Recap of Ahmed being injured during one of his many injuries. Ginger facial hairless Paul Bearer looks odd, but is doing more Percy Pringle here. AMAZING facial expressions here. Vader has BULLY in his tron showing him bullying that interviewer. Vater is out followed by Taker's incredible intro. Bearer is so great hiding behind the apron from Taker. Lariat and a legdrop lead to some arm work by Taker and then a giant stinger splash. Old School hits and a bit boot sends Vader to the floor. Diving lariat off the top hits for Taker. Paul attacks Taker with this shoe. Vader goes up for the pump splash, so Taker just UPPERCUTS HIM IN THE BALLS, not a DQ, and a super chokeslam hits for 3. Tombstone hits and gets the win.  Well, that's over thank God.

NOD vs. DOA video package leads to a Harts vs. Austin recap video. Todd does the recap video for this and he is great at VO. Backstage, we see Team USA with Animal looking HUGE. Some group sings the Canadian national anthem. They don't bother identifying them, so this was wasted money. Fink has a cowboy hat on, because of course. Bruce, Stu, and Helen Hart are in the front row along with the Calgary premier. Goldust has pyro and his costuming remains top-notch. Ken Shamrock, UFC Asskicker coming out of the wacky house set is amusing. Hot chicks have KEN SHAMROCK ROCKS shirts on.

 Austin comes out and jawjacks with the fans. The faces come out and boy is this sad to see now. It's like the last gasp of true happiness for them all as a group. They milk Bret's intro perfectly. Bret puts the shades on Helen. Bret and Austin stare down and slug away - perfect. Bret hits an inverted atomic drop and hits the lariat. Austin low-blows Bret in the corner. MILLION DOLLAR DREAM BY AUSTIN! Shamrock runs crazy on Neidhart and the belly to belly leads to a tag out. Owen hits the enzuiguri on Goldust. Hawk hits a FLYING SPLASH OFF THE TOP for perhaps the first time in his career. Bulldog hits his powerslam, but Goldust breaks up the pin.

Time for Bret vs. Animal. Owen hits the leg lariat and gets all pumped up. Austin chairshots Owen's knee. Austin fights hard out of the Hart corner to a chorus of boos. Test of strength between Anvil and Animal. Shamrock and Bret go at it, and Bret was a mentor for Ken in wrestling. Goldust hits a nice lariat. Austin beats up the Harts at ringside. The Harts come in and Austin is pinned by Owen. Austin jumps in after hiding under the ring and gets arrested. The Hart family comes in to celebrate.

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

WWE SD 3-14-17

AJ-Orton recap leads to Bryan recapping the card to someone on the phone and AJ complaining to Bryan. Shane HASN'T ARRIVED YET, but Bryan is here to help. AJ addresses Shane mid-ring and wants A CONVERSATION TONIGHT. Riveting. Becky beats Nattie with the Disarmer. Cena Teen Choice Awards clips. Miz and Maryse cut a promo on Nikki and Cena, with Maryse blaming Nikki for screwing up her contract negotiations before. Nikki talks shit to them after running down and we're getting a mixed tag at WM thanks to Bryan making the match and being pissed at Miz for imitating - and doing it VERY POORLY. Well, his kicks are shit. Miz makes some incredible faces here and Bryan says that since he can't punch Miz, he'll have Cena do it.

Mickie faces Alexa in a solid little match. Mickie wins with a Mick kick - good to see her be given some credibility. Shane comes to the building and AJ jumps him and beats the shit out of him! Finlay saves him. This ruled! Mojo faces Dolph in a battle of guys no one can care about. Dolph leaves and loses via countout. Well, good - he had nothing to gain with a win. Bray goes through the debris and yells at Orton. Usos beat Alpha with a superkick before we see Shane go backstage and challenge AJ for WM. This wasn't bad - but did really hurt the in-ring action by focusing on Shane.

Monday, March 13, 2017

WCW Wrestle War 1992

The wayback playback begins with an amusing anti-steroids PSA of the Freebirds, with Jimmy jacked to...be less fat. Sting's squadron is run down alongside the Dangerous Alliance. The Wrestle War graphic is solid. Tony and Eric run down the card before JR and Jesse are shown for commentary. The freebirds are out in an ungodly bad outfit - and yet not as bad as their later glitterati getup. Taylor and Valentine are out with Taylor looking like a waiter. Michael has the world's highest pair of tights on. Lots of nothing. Atomic drop. Valentine misses a corner charge and we see Garvin in something resembling good shape - almost no gut.

Pat talks about chatting with Jimmy and him saying he's happily retired as a grandfather. Hayes hits a sloppy elbow for 2. BACK BRIDGE BY HAYES!? Hayes is a shockingly good babyface in peril. Doctor bomb gets 2 for Taylor while the figure 4 is broken up by Garvin. GARVIN COMES IN AND HE'S GOING NUTS! O 'Connor roll leads to a lariat and then a double lariat. DDT hits Taylor and he backdrops Valentine at the same time and the Birds win. Shockingly great match - everyone tried.

Eric and Tony chat about the match for a bit. Johnny B. Badd vs. Tracy Smothers is up, and that should be good. Tracy is YOUNG PISTOL "TRACY" - so they put the wrong thing in quotes. Quite the gold and silver jacket on Tracy. It's nearly as flamboyant as Johnny's getup. A woman puts a dollar in his kneepad - so he's basically a stripper too. Bring the kids!

The match begins and folks immediately head for the bathrooms and concessions. Johnny's gear has aged very well with both the cape and his in-ring garb looking fantastic. Arndrag into an armbar for Badd. Ross talks about, yes, TRACY'S COLLEGE FOOTBALL BACKGROUND! A few folks are dressed up in the front row. Snapmare and a chinlock by Tracy. Big flying sunset flip off the top gets 2. Kiss That Don't Miss DOES NOT MISS and wins. The Freebirds are backstage with Missy and Precious. Hayes dedicates the win to Lynyrd Skynyrd because of course he did. I love these US Tag Title designs, and I like that Hayes wants this, but also wants the World titles too.

Scotty Flamingo vs. Bagwell is up now. Let's not front-load the card too much! Marcus comes out in shiny silver pants and they look horrible. Scotty does a mini-stripper routine to take off his worn-out denim to show off the neon pink and green zebra print. Keep the denim on. Bagwell's gear could be gold-ish too. Slap fight! Bagwell's...respectable HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL BACKGROUND is discussed. Shockingly, this isn't making the crowd more excited. Scotty tries to face smash him, but can't. Bagwell hits a clotheslines and Bagwell does one little taunt over and over, which Pat points out is exactly like a game. Scott uses the tights to win.

Ad for Beach Blast has some surprisingly skimpy bikini babes in it. JYD and Simmons are up to face Cactus and Mr. Hughes, acting as a replacement for Abby. JYD comes in through the crowd with a white tux jacket and shirt, red bowtie and JEANS. We get another PSA from Brian Pillman talking about young athletes dying thanks to drug usage...yowza. Mr. Hughes comes out with Jack and this Mr. Hughes getup was a huge upgrade from "The Big Cat" Curtis Hughes. Cactus has a beaded shirt for some reason. JYD gets knocked off the ramp by Cactus. Cactus tosses him into the ramp and hits the elbow off the ramp. JYD has new gear, but can't move. Five thousand people come out to check on JYD. The fans chant for JYD, which is better than him wrestling. Fonzie tells Jack that the match hasn't started, so it won't be a DQ. Man did he age quickly. Simmons hits a big double-barreled lariat. Jack does the squeal bit. It looks like it'll be Hughes vs. Simmons.

Hughes eats a hiptoss and we hear about how he would always be in companies and out of them. Ross runs through football backgrounds before Jesse asks where Jack played defensive line. Ha! Wonky elbow by Hughes leads to some rope choking. Simmons hits the spinebuster, but Jack runs in, gets tackled, and then Simmons hits the forward chop block to end it. Todd Champion comes out FROM THE WCW SPECIAL FORCES and he has an Olympic rings logo on his gear. The Super Invader comes out with Herc's roid belly, Herc's pale skin, and bacne. Also, a red and black split outfit that looks horrible.

Herc does chops and a lariat. Herc looks short in there with Champion, which is even more apparent when he puts Todd on his knees for a test of strength. The invader's red and black outfit is punctuated by his NEON GREEN AND PURPLE glove. Long chinlock. Maybe the neon green stuff helps with that. Powerbomb hits it to end it - and it's a bit like the Canadian backbreaker into it. This was somehow only 5 minutes. Richard Morton comes out in a purple sequined jacket and purple and green tights. Big Josh comes out with his log ride theme. Josh won both the US Tag and World Six-Man tag titles in WCW.

The ENTIRE FRONT ROW LEAVES and then Josh hits a tackle. Outstanding punches and chops in the corner from Josh. OUTSTANDING RUNNING FOREARM SHIVER in the corner. Great selling off the inverted atomic drop - Josh sold it perfectly. Morton, the heel, is fighting from underneath. Corkscrew elbow hits and a nice Magnum-style belly to belly hits too. Earthquake splash ends it. This was stuff. Pillman vs. Zenk is up and we get a recap of their issues - which I saw before on the New Blood on the Block tape. Zenk's shirt is a bit ridiculous, but his overall attire is better than Brian's all-denim stuff. Pat and Jim joke about their clothes and how Zenk looks like a Florida retiree.

Tom Zenk retired and became a noted blogger of sorts and...outspoken to say the least about how shitty the WWF was. And then his site disappeared after he posted a Photoshop of Vince being fucked by a panda after the WWF name was changed. The WCW Light Heavyweight Title was very similar to the final WCW TV Title, and looked good. Great back and forth stuff here. Lots and lots of leg work. Jesse and Jim debate football for quite some time, with Jim putting over PIllman being a nose tackle and Jesse saying you should be Ron Simmons's size for that. Pillman misses a somersault senton on the leg, as ya do. We get a cool overhead camera shot of the ring, which mixes things up.
Zenk hits a backbreaker, but misses a running pump splash. Pillman works the knee for a bit. Pillman locks on a figure four and slaps him a bunch - I love that. Jim Ross talks about Lance Russell and Gordon Solie doing alternate commentary on the Hotline - well, that's something. Outside-in dive by Pillman leads to a slick powerslam for 2. Nice chops by Zenk, but a crucifix gets 2. Jesse complains about the LACK OF CHEATING HERE. A Pillman superplex is met with punches and Zenk overshoots off a crossbody and Pillman does a flip, which gets 2. Leapfrog exchanges lead to a...mid-air thing that I think was going to be a snapmare. Well, that didn't work. Giant flapjack by Zenk gets 2. Elbow misses and Zenk does Brian's own fakeout for a knee injury before Zenk hits a giant kick for 2. I love that spot - loved it on the New Blood tape and I love it now. Missile dropkick misses and Pillman gets a jackknife cradle for the win. Sloppy, but good-ish match.

Beach Blast ad. Another PSA, now from Larry Z - WRESTLERS ARE TOUGH, FOR REAL! Actually a darn nice promo wrapped in that PSA mixed in with a bit of that Morphoplex ad. Fujinami is back with WCW for this show, to team with Iizuki to face the Steiners. The Steiners are over like crazy here. Iizuka still wrestles and is in Suzuki-Gun now and uses the Iron Fingers in comedy matches. Scott botches the moonsault fallaway slam on Fujinami, but hits it on Iizuka. This is the same move that MATANZA uses now and it's crazy that Scott was doing it in '92. Flying elbow from Iizuka gets 2. Iizuka gets a Liontamer and then a regular crab. Scott goes to power out, so it's turned into a jackknife for 2. BUTTERFLY POWERBOMB GETS A HUGE POP! Flying elbow by Rick while Scott has him in a Canadian backbreaker busts up Iizuka's lip.

Fujinami comes in and takes it to basics. Headlocks and elbows. Half crab by Scott and Jesse talks about Iizuka bleeding on the outside. Fujinami puts Rick up on his shoulders and he holds him so Iizuka eats a nasty-looking belly to belly for 2. Iizuka stiffs him a few times and Rick's like fuck that and puts a headlock on. Fujinami works on the leg a lot while Iizuka does what he can to heal up on the apron, clearly in agony. SECOND ROPE LEG AVALANCHE by Fujinami. Iizuka's right eye is shut and Rick goes for a nose lock. Dickhead. Scott hits a tilt a whirl on Iizuka for 2. Scott locks on a double chickenwing and then a necklock. Scott just t-bones him with ease - like it's fucking nothing at all. Lesnar has nothing on him. Rick GRINDS THE NOSE WITH HIS KNEE. Dick! Over the shoulder corner charge by Rick slams his face into the second rope. Stiff pumphandle drop by Scott leads to an elbow.

Things slow back down a bit, thank God. Fujinami locks on an abdominal stretch. A front facelock gets a USA chant. Fujinami stiffs him, so Scott just tosses him down hard and tags Rick in. Iizuka comes in and kicks the fuck out of him as much as he can before Rick just powers HIM DOWN TO GET 2. Scott uses them as a post for a backflip and a double armdrag before Rick hits a double lariat. German gets 2 for Iizuka before they spike piledrive Scott. Iizuka hits a missile dropkick before Fujinami gets a sleeper and then the dragon sleeper. Scott boots him. Rick comes in to murder Iizuka with a lariat, shoulderblock and elbow. Belly to belly off the top hits to end it. Great-looking move and it's one they should really bring back.

Jim and Jesse chat before Tony and Eric chat. They aren't building the War Games cage, so I guess it will drop from the ceiling here. Sirens blare while they hype up War Games. They kill more time with the fans being shown and they send rocket pyro into the cage on the ceiling. Solid idea. Bad execution though. We get a series of screens explaining the rules. To be fair, they just fill this out with an explanation of EVERY COIN TOSS. THREE SCREENS OF GRAPHICS FOR THIS. Jeez.

The Dangerous Alliance comes out. Austin is sadly still in his ultra-'90s getup. Steamboat's got a busted up nose. Austin and Windham start off with tons of punches. Barry's falling DDT looks so slick. GIANT Paul E sucks chant breaks out. Steve goes for a monkey bar kick, but Barry hoists him up and flapjacks him. Austin's busted up and Barry's wrist tape is caked in blood - awesome visual. THE HEELS WIN THE COIN TOSS. Rude goes after Barry and he's ripped, tan, and intense. Rude has a brown eye on the back of his trunks. Subtle.

STEAMBOAT COMES IN TO SAVE HIS FRIEND! Chain of DDTs! Rana with punches by Steamboat. Arn comes in to fight with Barry, and they have great chemistry. Spinebuster to Steamboat!  Double half crab by Arn and Rude to Steamboat - I like that. Rude piledrives Steamboat. Steamboat gets tossed into the second ring, which is covered in blood. Dustin elevates Steve into the cage with an inverted atomic before lariating him down.

Arn has his head put between the rings while Barry humps away for some reason. Well, not even Arn can bat 1,000. Figure 4 by Steamboat. Larry comes in. Madusa goes up top and tosses the cell phone in. Sting chases her off, and boy is the cage sinking in with just her on it - and she ain't exactly heavy. Sting comes in with the facebuster and the press slams into the cage for Rudes. Love that spot - although Dr. Death did it best to Terry Gordy in '89. Madusa tapes up Bobby's right hand. Arn is busted open and in white - good man. Dustin is busted up and lost a battle to Freddy there. Jesus. Nikita runs in and teases issues with Sting playing off their past, BUT HE TAKES THE BULLET FOR STING. Great stuff there. Sting has the deathlock on Arn, but Eaton breaks it up. Nikita smashes Austin's face into the buckle, which is now red. Dustin's gear is red too. Flying elbow misses. Jesus. The ring is just covered in blood. They take the buckle off and Larry hits Bobby, who gets armbared by Sting and taps. The ring is caked in blood and torn apart - so it does truly look like a war has taken place. The heels bicker while Bobby asks Larry why he hit him with a hook.

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

WWE SmackDown Live 3-7-17

We get a recap of the cabin burning before Shane and Bryan come out and argue a bit. Bryan wants Orton to get the shot, and Shane wants AJ to get it. They talk and talk and talk for eons before saying that Orton vs. AJ tonight determines the title shot. I thought this was already announced. AJ is all pissed and it's time for the mixed tag. Awful awful stuff here. Double five knuckle shuffle and a Rack Attack/AA in stereo before an STF/Fearless Lock end it. Miz and Maryse attack and brag.

Orton chats for a bit about facing AJ. Hawkins faces Dean. Or not. Baron chats on the tron, Hawkins eat the Dirty Deeds and we get a recap of the women's history crap. Mojo says he'll be in the Andre battle royal. Dolph mocks him, Baron beats up Dean. Alexa, Mickie, Becky, Nattie, and seemingly every person on Earth comes out to chat. Bryan makes a heel vs. face tag. Nattie attacks Becky and Bliss covers, before Mickie beats her up and grabs the belt because she's mad that Bliss stole the pin. AJ and Randy have a really fun match. Springboard 450 misses and Orton hits a pop-up RKO to win.

Sunday, March 5, 2017

WWE Fastlane 2017

Joe is asked questions in the lounge. Very stupid questions. TOZAWA wins the pre-show match and the KO-Goldberg hype video does an outstanding job of making that match seem like a big deal. Joe vs. Sami starts things off strong with a stiff encounter. Sami gets a chance to shine with his strikes, giving Joe natural chances to attack. Blue thunder gets 2, but a sunset bomb is avoided, leading to an STO and a chokeout.  Awesome showcase for Joe. RoboCharly chats with Bayley. Enzo and Cass come out. In-canon, Enzo is so annoying that even his best friend hated him when they first met because he was so annoying. Boy did the crowd die a death once Luke got on offense. Rocket launcher gets 2.5 thanks to a save, but Enzo eats the rocket kick and loses when Luke takes his foot off the rope. This sucked.

Mick chats with Stephanie via phone - she can cut balls off via satellite. She buries the plane crew for not fixing the plane. Nia vs. Sasha is up...nah. Zelda on the Switch beckons! Sasha's never been able to beat Nia...so I guess the Survivor Series tapout never happened. Sasha gets a front choke, but Nia overpowers her. Sasha gets the crossface, but eats a Samoan drop. Nia gets an O'Connor roll and wins with a bridge.

Jinder and Rusev bicker earlier. Sweet Christ, Jinder looks even more jacked than he did on Raw. They brawl and Cesaro comes out in a new gold jacket. Cesaro wins after a thousand centuries. Rusev kicks the shit out of Jinder afterwards. Big Show comes out. A long, endless boring match goes on. Show hits three chokeslams and debuts a stinkface-positioned KO punch to win. KO chats with RoboCharly.

Cruiserweight title time. Can't wait for Jack's WM intro - him coming to the ring in a giant motorized tea cup. They almost got the crowd back, but Neville hit the Red Arrow to counter Gallagher's superplex attempt. Heyman says that no matter who wins tonight, Brock wins. New Day is out with an ice cream bike. Well, I guess now they can put the little ice cream bike in their action figures now.

Roman vs. Braun is up. Lots of clubbing. Big NERVE HOLD by Braun. Gotta be shitting me. Nerve hold. Then a double chinlock. NOW A CHINLOCK. Roman is tossed and then put through an announce table. SPEAR GETS 2. Braun misses a flying splash and Roman spears him to win. Yikes. Mick tells Joe to not show up tonight in the main event. Women's title match is up. Back and forth to start things off. Tons of mocking by Charlotte.  Moonsault gets 2 for Charlotte. Super rana leads to the Macho elbow. Charlotte kicks the knee and a Natural Selection gets 2. One fan claps. Moonsault attempt, but Sasha nixes that and gets a wedgie. Belly to Bayley on the floor and another one gets the win...so they ended THE CHARLOTTE STREAK ON FASTLANE!?
Raw recap leads to Owens-Goldberg. KO stalls on the floor for a while. The match hasn't started. Jericho comes down and distracts, the bell rings, he eats a spear and a jackhammer. I actually missed the spear due to the Network having issues, but the main event of WM was made official - Goldberg vs. Lesnar will be for the title.

WCW Starrcade 1992

We get a runthrough of MOST of the prior Starrcades, but skipping two years. Well, it's WCW. Pillman and Barry's graphics have their names on the wrong person. Because WCW. They have a really nice graphic for the Battlebowl ring - and it's aged nicely. Jesse has a Malcolm X hat on and Jim talks about a main event change and throws to a PRE-TAPED SEGMENT saying that Dr. Death gets the shot. We get shots of the guys sitting bored in shitty-looking locker rooms. Bill Watts is mid-ring with Hank Aaron...oh wow. So Watts got this job and did an interview with the Torch saying that he should be able to discriminate if you own a business. Sting comes down to get the run and maybe give some distance between Watts and Aaron. Larry is with Missy, wearing giant suspenders over her tits.

Van Hammer comes out in shiny silver tights with a cowboy hat and acid-washed denim. So is he glam rock, country, or what? Dan Spivey is out looking 45 and appears to have not worked out in at least a month. Cactus Jack is out to carry Hammer again and to team with Johnny B Badd. Badd spikes Hammer on a rana. Ouch! Bossman slam by Spivey on Badd. Big jumping shoulderblock by Hammer on Jack, Badd punches Jack and Hammer schoolboys him to win. Wow was this nothing.

They roll the tumbler and Dustin and Vader team up. Harley's tux is something else. They'll face Barbarian and Kensuke Sasaki. Wow is this random, and that's the point, but wow. Barb slams Vader to START. Hart Attack by Vader and Dustin to Barb. Sasaki hits a dropkick to Vader and then suplexes him. Dustin tags in and fires away on Barb with great-looking punches. Great flying lariat too. Barb runs into Sasaki and gets schoolboyed - so for the second of TWO MATCHES, WE GET THAT SAME FINISH. Vader beats up Dustin afterwards to hopefully take him out of Battlebowl.

They hype up SuperBrawl III as THE BIGGEST EVENT OF THE YEAR. I thought that was Starrcade...ya know, this show? Barry and Muta will team up against Scorpio and Pillman. Barry's gut game is strong here. Barry and Scorpio go at it and have some solid exchanges. Pillman and Muta have even better action. Nice floatover suplex by Barry gets 2. Muta spinkicks Scorpio to the floor. Barry hits the impaler DDT on Scorp leading to the moonsault for the win...with  Brian breaking it up at 2.

Sting teams with Dr. Death. Erik Watts teams up Jushin Liger. Yup, that's a natural pairing. Erik Watts is in here looking completely out of place. Erik has gigantic trunks on that might be bigger than Dr. Death's. Liger going at it with Dr. Death is interesting style-wise, and because it's Inoki vs. Baba. Doc's chops are awesome. Watts...does things resembling moves to Doc. His dropkicks and knees are hilarious. STF is better than Cena though. Hot shot to Watts ends it. Between his matches tonight, Muta will work THREE MATCHES in one night.

We see Chono and Muta clips from Japan and hear from Pat about how Watts told them to tone it down before the show. Long armlock on the mat. Back and forth abdominal stretches. STF wins for Chono and he retains the NWA Title. Rude is out in the most denim outfit ever bitching about his injury. Doc comes out to face Ron Simmons for the World title. Shocking. Three point tackle leads to another charge, a leapfrog and a lariat by Ron. Doc pulls the hair to act as the heel. Doc just muscles him up and backbreakers him. Front knee clip by Doc, so Ron hits one of his own. They fight on the floor for a double countout.

Barry and Brian come out while Steamboat and Shane are out. Shane is young, hopeful and...in a sliced-up silver jacket. Ricky and Barry have good chemistry, even with Barry being fat and going through the motions. Steamboat and Barry fight on the ramp. Great spot where Brian tosses Shane into their corner where Barry elbows him in the back of the head - that can go back now and work just fine. Okada dropkick by Pillman with Shane up top and he flips off the top to the floor. That's held up nicely too. Shane has debris all over his back and looks ridiculous. Chairs to the back are fine. Belly to belly hits and Pat laments the loss of the belly to belly - right before Bayley brings it back. Neat.

Jesse and Ross look bored while we get a recap of the Vader-Sting issues leading to the king of cable tourney. Vader and Sting have outstanding chemistry and it continues here. Sting hits a koppou kick! Cactus clothesline by Sting! They're each covered in debris from the floor because Watts didn't want mats on the floor. Vader locks on a seated abdominal stretch and works the hold nicely. Backslide gets 2. Nice punt to the ribs by Vader. Sting hits a back suplex and Vader goes up nicely. VADER CLUBS HIM AND STING WANTS MORE. FUCK YEAH. Now that's a babyface! Vader's getting tired, and Sting's strategy works. Sting gets a Samoan drop, but lands in the ropes. Flying splash by Sting gets 2. Race distracts and Vader clubs him before chokeslamming him. Flying splash off the second rope hits for Vader. Vader dives into a powerslam and Sting wins! Sting's diving splash was absolutely gorgeous and really underrated.

Sting cuts a promo with Jesse with the King of Cable trophy.  They talk to Paul...something, an NFL player about the importance of the Battle Bowl ring and most importantly the importance of his check for this appearance clearing. There are only eight people in this battle royal. Hammer works over on Spivey in the corner with... a running blowjob? Well, that was a bad camera angle. Whole lotta nothing. Some stomps. Sting and Vader are out via Cactus clothesline. Dan Spivey outlasted them. And now folks leave. Barry's nose got busted up somehow and Muta eliminates him to win. Wow was this all nothing.