Monday, March 23, 2015

Raw 3-23-15

Generic show intro - so no graphic for Perro unless they do something mid-show. Woohoo! STING STARTS OFF THE SHOW! Sting says he's not here to fight a war for WCW - THAT WOULD BE RIDICULOUS! Just what I always imagined when I thought of Sting's first WWE Raw promo - STEPH! WCW was a small fish? Well, then how were they able to kick WWE's ass for so long? Sting was compared to a dog, who also hurt a Steph-involved WM build. Steph said that HHH would beat Sting, so that might not happen. Steph keeps going on and on about dogs, but Sting blocks a slap. HERE COMES THE BOARDROOM BADASS, THE GAME, THE KING OF KINGS, HHH! HHH gets the hammer. "I'm gonna swing this bat around, and if you get hit with it, it's your own fault!" So this was a thing. WHAT AN ORGANIC SEGUE TO THE DAMN APP! You can vote for Orton's opponent tonight. Paige or AJ face Nikki later and Truth and Dean face Harper and Stardust next.


There's a match going on here and we've got JBL going on about betting and Barrett being the FIVE TIME FIVE TIME FIVE TIME FIVE TIME FIVE TIME IC Champion. If they're just going to talk about whatever the fuck they want to, there is literally no point to guys taking bumps. Just play jacks mid-ring, or thumb wrestle. Mid-match chinlock after the break. JBL AND BARRETT TALKED ABOUT SOCCER. Truth got the loosest Lil Jimmy for the win ever, and danced with Dean.

SD is just going to be all about Axxess, so that will be quite skippable. Special Olympics video. WWE LOVES THE DIFFERENTLY-ABLED! Unless they have Bell's Pallsy. HE CAN. AND HE WIN. BELIEVE THAT. So yeah, that wasn't quite as great as Brock saying he's just going to fuck this man up. JBL buried paying $65 for WM. Un-fucking-believable. Of all the shows to bury the PPV on, WHY THIS ONE?! YOU'RE CHARGING MORE FOR IT THAN ANY OTHER SHOW! And WM resulting in tons of people online means that WWE absolutely needs a problem-free show. WOOHOO! A TEN GEEK TAG! Miz and Mizdow are out, why, I have no idea. They've had 80 breakups now. Miz of course is interested in Get Hard. Interview with Ferrell and Kevin Hart about their angle. I COULD SEE THE WHOLE THING ON THE SITE. No thanks. The "best of" was already shit.

There's no SD, so they have three hours to sell people on THIS WrestleMania card and they're doing a horrendous job of doing so. This giant tag is a thing to hype up the battle royal, with Bill Simmons with a five o' clock shadow and a track suit. This is the second match of...well, two matches so far where they should just thumb wrestle and not take bumps because of the commentary. Ryback's got red and black on, so he looks far better tonight than usual. Ryback beat Miz with the Shellshock for the 10th time. Simmons talked about getting all the PPVs for the cost of 2 with the Network and they recapped Sting and Orton and the TWO HOUR KICK OFF SHOW FOR WM.

It's astonishing to see Kofi in this big company-wide hype video package. This "My Hero Is" thing is goofy though. Orton's out for his match against whoever. "He's finally going to get his hands on Seth Rollins". He already did that and killed him with many kinds of death. Seth and J and J won. Goons get beaten up and eat a double draping DDT. Amusing bit where Seth goes for the stomp during the RKO setup, but Orton gets up, goes for an RKO to Seth leading to a lariat that sends Mercury to the floor. RKO to Noble and that's it. Cena-Rusev hype should involve the Rusev hype. So far, it's just a Cena interview. THERE IS DOCUMENTED PROOF that Cena loves America. Hell of a line there. SWAGGER VS. RUSEV TONIGHT in match 9,000 in their series. Dolph-Bryan recap sets up a rematch with a guest ref angle for whatever reason. Also, Snoop.



Matadores are out to face the champs, and the tag title match is back to being a 4-way with Uso back and now it's on the kickoff. It's an interspecies rematch. Okay then. Bull beats Nattie with the sunset flip. Kane threatened Barrett with taking the title from him SO THEY COULD PUT IT ABOVE THE RING TONIGHT. NOT AT WM. TONIGHT. They announced a random 8-man tag for SD.

Rusev's mid-ring. Cloud Strife for the win! Shockingly huge pop for Swagger and "We the People!" WE WANT LANA! Ha! Well, they seemingly broke them up here by having Cole explain that there's a rift due to her giving Cena the title match. You'll never guess, but Rusev beat Swagger. Good heat for this though and they used this as a backdrop to sell the rest of the WM card. Cena runs down to make the save and grounds and pounds him. Cena's punches look like badly-animated punches in a video game. Rusev tosses Cena over the table into the chairs and takes a nasty bump. Rusev roars and hits the big running superkick on the floor. Rusev locked on the Accolade and Cena passed out. Wow. Awesome! Booker, the semi-active wrestler, was outraged over refs not getting Rusev off of Cena. I wouldn't mind a Rusev-Booker match, actually - Booker can go, and lose without any real harm. This was so great.


Bray cut an awesome promo while Taker's special effects played on. He did his kneeling pose while thunder played. That was such an effective build for WM, so of course they threw to VOTING FOR THE GUEST REF right after it.Rick Rubin should play Luke Harper's father. HOF video for KEVIN NASH AKA DIESEL! Kidd and Nattie had. A SUBTLE. BURGER KING. AD!  The chicken fries now induce orgasms.

Bryan and Dolph came out for their match. Dean's the ref. "I'M THE LAW AND ORDER!" Dean needs more zeros in his paycheck. Cole asked his partners about what it means to be IC Champion. Yup. Booker's epic IC Title run of like three weeks. Ditto JBL's where he lost it to Rey in seconds. THERE. IS. A. MATCH. GOING. ON. and these fuckers are talking about JBL not being on Booker's doc. Cole recapped the turd deal. Great - I'd just forgotten about that. Lariat over into the timekeeper's area before the break. YOU GUYS NEED TO GET BACK IN THE RING! Oh yeah, there's a Brock-Roman face to face thing tonight. Here I thought these guys would be given time for this "classic" that Cole hyped up.


 Super X Factor gets 2. Corner kicks by Bryan set up the dropkick, but he eats a superkick and a Zig Zag for the win. This was good - not a classic that Cole hyped it up as. Thank God Dean attacked Dolph or else Kane's plan to put the title above the ring would've just been stupid. Everyone brawled. Everyone was down and then the belt was still this was a thing. They're so worried about the health of ALL OF THESE MEN WHO JUST DID RISKY SHIT that they almost changed their tone for half a second.

Paul Heyman cut one of his best promos ever that was so good that even Brock Lesnar was in visible awe for quite a while. Roman came down and got a "LET'S GO LESNAR!" CHANT. Roman grabbed the belt and got booed. Tug of war over the belt ended the show...yeah that wasn't great.

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Saturday, March 21, 2015

NXT 3-18-15

NXT IS ON THE ROAD! Riley-Owens hype video starts the show off. The building is set up pretty well, although the lighting is a bit different. Kalisto's out to face Breeze. Fast exchange of spins and kicks. Springboard dive's countered into a dropkick by Breeze. Springboard something led to a supermodel kick for 2. That was sloppy. Enzuiguri hits and a 450 gets 2. Backflip kick from Kalisto, but the Beauty Shot hits for the win. Riley-Owens-Balor video.

JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY a tan thing resembling Alexa Bliss cut a promo. A LONG Arnold Classic video airs. Balor and Riley exchange words. Riley's SERIOUS FACE here was hilarious. Cass faces one of the tag champs next. Champs come out first, followed by the Jersey goombas. Big Cass has new hilarious gear with BIG cASS on it. Cass gets some backdrops and elbows. Distraction schoolboy gets the win for Blake as Cass accidentally knocked Carmella off the apron.

Dana Brooke highlight vid has the most skin on a WWE TV show in ages. Bliss-Banks is up. Not much of a pop for Bliss, and their short match ends with a post shot on the floor. Owens is looking forward to taking out Riley and Balor. Bliss cut a "post-match" promo showing no signs of wear. Riley came out and Owens followed him. Riley basically got squashed here, despite THE RAGE IN THE RIGHT HAND of Riley. Riley took some bumps off the barricade, which sucked since they were welded right into the concrete stage above the ring. Pop-up powerbomb wins. Balor saves Riley, but Owens gets one last shot in for good measure. Fun, but they didn't really do much to hype up the first ever Balor-Owens match all things considered.This was a pretty crappy show.

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Friday, March 20, 2015

TNA Impact Wrestling 3-20-15

Last week, TNA had one of their best shows yet on Destination America, with the Spud-EC3 main event being so good that Bryan and Vinny even reviewed it and the company got a ton of credit for basically making two stars in one night. This week, we've got Joe-Aries in Joe's final TNA match and Kurt battling Lashley for the title, so it should be good. Destination America has also changed their bug from the garish red, white, and blue one to a far more subdued grey and white. It's still absolutely gigantic and takes up too much of the screen, but it looks better now.

In rewatching Bram-Magnus, I think I should make Bram. The chest hair should be easy enough to replicate since I've got it on Hall and Goldberg, and I go with the dark shaded black I used for Willow's pants for his gear. On Unlocked, they had more typos, but Drew's interview with Tenay was great. He's been working since he was 15. He went on and on and on and on and on about not wanting things being shoved down the throats of fans and BEING A FAN FIRST, AND BEING A FAN, AND HE'S THE BIGGEST FAN! Tenay asks him about being The Chosen One in WWE, which will be next week's hook. God that Lashley-Angle hype vid ruled - I should do that match in 2K14. One little thing I didn't notice was the case having giant I'M WITH SPUD stickers. Tenay ran down Spud singing God Save the Queen and its melody being the same for My Country Tis of Thee. Next week's Unlocked focuses on the roster's favorite video games - I hope Fire Pro Wrestling Returns is on a lot of lists.

Both Lashley and Angle are made to look like world-beaters in the show-opening video. We get a tag title Ultimate X, and a KOs triple threat title match as well. Ultimate X starts the show off. Robbie isn't out with the Bro Mans, which Josh explains verbally and then they show Robbie lamenting over the loss to Brooke. Manik and Sanada are out for the Revolution - good choices for this. Everyone does stuff and Sanada is forced to accidentally DDT Manik. Wolved chuck DJZ over the top for his usual bump to the floor. Funny bit with Jesse jumping off of DJZ, but not being able to reach. Taz says they should be wearing gloves. HEEL CHICKEN FIGHT! Backstabber Powerbomb to Manik from the Wolves. Crowd's going crazy for things here. MIST TO JESSE UP TOP leads to a flip bump - nice! Super rana to Sanada by Eddie. Davey double stomp! Wolves climb up, double crawl, and win this!

Josh and Taz talk in the booth. Josh has tats on his upper left arm too. Aries comes down and they talk about why he doesn't have the case - and Aries says he was taken out by the BDC. Aries and Ki talk, and then Joe jumps Aries to set up Joe's final TNA match. Josh talks about Joe "making headlines over the past few weeks and this being a big match for him". Joe counters the brainbuster with a gordbuster. Nice bearhug into an overhead belly to belly by Joe leads to Joe talking about how Angle ended Joe's streak. Joe eats a neckbreaker on the apron after some corner chops. Brainbuster's countered into a floatover Fujiwara armbar by Joe - nice! Ki attacks Aries, so that's it for Joe...underwhelming. Aries takes him out with the case, so Spud cashes in and wins! Spud celebrates with the fans - nice!

Backstage, Magnus beats the hell out of Bram. They fight to the ring, of course, and Magnus hits him a bunch with a chair. Mickie came down and kneed him in the balls before MORE BRAWLING. Powerbomb on the ramp by Magnus. Josh throws to locker room predictions for the title match. Kong comes out first, then Gail, which leads to Josh talking about her being a future TNA Hall of Famer. Hey, why not - she deserves it. Taryn came out and Josh quizzed Taz on her being a ref, him having no recollection and going on and on about it being trivia. Kong does power spots while everyone bumps for her. Gail hops off a double pin to keep trying to make her seem like a monster.


Kong tosses her off the cutter. Awesome splash misses AND SHE GETS THE CUTTER FOR 2! Taryn ties her up and literally kicks her ass to the floor. Gail dives to Kong on the floor. Sunset bomb by Gail to Taryn gets 2. Schoolgirl out of Eat Defeat gets the win! Really fun match here - best one on the show so far. Taryn's look of shock here is something else. Storm cuts a promo on Matt Hardy. Heads or Tails decision isn't good for Matt. So that's apparently a match, and it's next.


A really cool epic video hypes up the World title match. Storm came out, followed by Hardy. Garbage brawl. Legdrop with a lid. Manik crotches Hardy, leading to Storm setting up a chair bridge. Superplex through it to Matt. DO NOT TAKE BUMPS LIKE THIS ANYMORE. Tacks are brought out, but Storm goes into them with a Side Effect. Why take a tack bump in this nothing match? It didn't even get a graphic to start the show. Koya gets THE NON-FOLDABLE CHAIR and Matt hits him with it. Twist to Manik. Storm throws Matt's head into the corner chair, but only gets 2. RKO out of nowhere from Matt! Mist, cowbell, and two superkicks get the win. This was a video game match, and not even a really good one. THE TACK BUMP MEANT NOTHING here. Bell to the head "sends him to the hospital". British Boot Camp 2 PPV ad.


They did the really cool walk backstage intro and gave him his rare full intro theme here. Taz talks about how you can see how legit the intros are without guys yelling at them where to be and what to do. Man did this rule - each guy got this and it's something they should do every single time they have a World title match. It makes that title seem so much more important. They give the intros plenty of time and go to a break - so hopefully that's the last break we see. Big "Angle" chant starts things off while they do basic wrestling stuff.

 Awesome back and forth throws here. Rolling Germans to Lashley! They brawl on the floor and Lashley takes him down while the crowd claps like crazy. Elbow to the back by Lashley gets 2. Angle comes back and gets a flying shoulderblock off the second rope. Back and forth punches lead to Angle doing a duck-behind and getting MORE ROLLING GERMANS! Spinning spinebuster hits for 2. Lashley misses a corner charge and eats four Germans, but Lashley comes back with the powerslam for 2 and an ad break. Another corner charge misses and leads to an ankle lock.

Spear from Lashley is countered with a kick and an Angle Slam for 2! Josh says they've taken their last break - kudos to TNA for only putting one in the body of the match. Back elbow gets the edge for the champ again. Delayed vertical suplex hits. Big spear hits! 2.999999999! Runup belly to belly is countered. FROG SPLASH FROM LASHLEY misses! Crossbody off the top by Kurt is rolled through into an ankle lock seamlessly, leading to tons of boos. Angle slam hits, but he can't get a good cover and gets 2. Lashley gets the Rousey armbar.

Kurt counters into the ankle lock! GRAPEVINE! Taz wonders why no one booked these guys together before. Damn right. Lashley passes out and that's it! Nope! HE TAPS! Kurt holds the belt high and cries after the win. This was amazing. I'd say it was a match of the year contender quite easily. They shake hands and hug. Kurt got his whole theme played and Taz put this over as being a big moment for Kurt after his struggles in life and with his health.


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WWE SmackDown 3-19-15

I had a super-busy day of writing, so beyond not caring about SD, there wasn't even time to watch it after the fact and save a ton of time in the process. Brock recap from Raw. THE BIG DOG, WHO CAN AND WILL comes down and is greeted by Henry. He won over Mark and Mark's putting all his money on THE BIG DOG, WHO CAN AND WILL! So Henry's a face because...he got cheered on Raw? Authority B-team comes down and makes Kane and Seth versus them later. Fujinami is announced for the HOF, but doesn't even get his video. Paige is in her super-hot maroon gear. Paige reverses a crucifix to win. Raw Rebound focuses on the Authority not turning on Seth...which really serves not purpose now that WE KNOW THEY'RE TOGETHER SINCE THEY WERE IN THE INTRO!


Gauntlet features Stardust being annoying on an inset promo, then losing and beating up Dean. Dean beats Truth due to Stardust distracting him, and then Harper comes out. I love Harper's crossface! Discus lariat leads to a schoolboy. Black Hole Slam gets 2. Superkick sets up the rebound lariat! DISCUS LARIAT FROM HARPER! Sitout bomb gets the win! Bryan comes out. Backstage, some guys prevent some other guy from getting in. Noble is their boss - so now J and J are actual security, or maybe Jamie's just using the money he's being paid to hire all of these people and make himself seem like a big deal. I rather like that idea, so I'm going with it.

Shockingly, Bryan and Harper had a great match. They started with basic legwork to weaken Harper, but moved on to strikes before Harper tossed him out. Bryan comes back, dives to the floor, AND KICKS HIM AGAINST THE BARRICADE! Bryan goes for the kick combo, but Harper counters into a half nelson suplex! Yikes! Bryan gets a heel hook for a win. Dolph's out and they have a fast-paced exchange. Bryan counters a rana into a powerbomb with a jackknife pin for 2. Bryan goes for a super back suplex, but Dolph turns it into a crossbody for 2. Buzzsaw kick hits for 2. Running knee countered with a superkick for 2.! Yes Lock countered into a cradle for 2, then a backslide for 2. Buzzsaw misses into a Zig Zag for the win! Bryan vs. Harper and Bryan vs. Dolph were outstanding! Barrett comes down to kick ass and finally look strong as IC Champ.


Raw recaps. Divas take sides in the WM divas tag. Cena-Rusev recap. 6-being tag. Cesaro's got new blue gear. Noble talks to security again. Nothing really much to the match, but Nattie wins by counter the flying bull into a Nattie-sta bomb for the win! BIG DAWG comes down, but Henry's hurt. THE BIG DAWG OVERCOMES THE ODDS and beats Kane. Heels jump him, but Orton comes in, but since it's not from the ramp, the goons have no idea where he is. Seth avoids the RKO and there's another match that feels like a bigger deal than the WWE Title match. Really fun show tonight.

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Monday, March 16, 2015

WWE Raw 3-16-15

Orton-Authority recap video with Cole rattling off a ton of weird lines like Orton WEAVING HIS WAY BACK INTO THE FABRIC OF THE AUTHORITY. Authority B-team are mid-ring and Rollins, WHO WAS BEATEN HALF TO DEATH is of course totally fine. What happened last week was BETRAYAL. No, not the Game Boy Color game. Orton missed four months for a pair of curb stomps, and yet Orton is COMPLETELY FINE HERE. Tonight's own recaps of this feud are hurting what we're seeing now. Mercury looks at least 45 with this super-fake tan going on. Show was nearly in tears being goofy here. He's at least having fun with this. Show said more words and then Kane said some words while mocking Show. Loved Show's DAMN RIGHT HE WILL while Kane said Orton would pay. NOBLE SAID HE WAS THE SECRET WEAPON OF THE AUTHORITY! Mercury couldn't even say anything about how hurt he was. Poor guy.

TWELVE MINUTES IN, Seth got to the point - he accepts Orton's WM match. If this was Lucha Underground, we've had have at least one exciting match by now. I AGREE TO FACE YOU AT THE BIGGEST STAGE OF THE YEAR, BUT FIRST, I WANT A MATCH ON A RANDOM RAW. Seth is really a horrible businessman. Orton sure is getting his revenge on these guys by saying words. He'll face Seth tonight in the main event, and if he gets beaten down, that makes WM sweeter. Orton is perhaps the only babyface in history looking forward to getting his ass kicked tonight. They hype up a CONTROVERSIAL interview with Brock tonight. Every interview is called that. AJ faces Nikki next.

WM hype vid.  Cole got the start time of WM wrong, so he was buried for eons. AJ and Paige's asses look fantastic here. This commentary is several kinds of God-awful. They go to a break after an iffy headscissors takedown. We come back to a post-break armlock - so it's at least not a chinlock. Booker talked about all women hating each other while a match theoretically went on.

LL Cool J hyped up WM as spectacular, leading to them talking about WM being four hours long with a TWO HOUR LONG PRE-SHOW. Oh Christ. Recap of Henry-Roman on SD. Renee met with Kane and Show, who doesn't have a title yet. Seth came in and bitched at them, and Kane told him that only Steph can talk to them like that. And now the Authority doesn't get along. Ryback's out in a red and white getup that isn't quite awful. Six month old Shop ad here. Ugh. Cole made an absolutely terrifying face.

Truncated recap of Ryback killing Miz on Raw. Miz cut a promo on Mizdow ensuring his win. Mizdow has to win this battle royal, right? Nevermind - Miz lost twice, so he might be winning the battle royal. Amusing bit where Ryback held Miz so Mizdow could hit him. Mizdow fans him, but eats a Finale. Cena-Rusev hype. IT'S PERSONAL AND PATRIOTIC! Nice hype video that gave you last week's story, but really made Cena look like a prick without providing the context of the Fastlane match. US Title contract signing time.


I like the half-and-half table setup here. Cole alerted Cena to the fact that the document in front of him was a contract - thanks, Cole. Cena's fighting Rusev, Rusef, and Rusov - CAN HE OVERCOME THE ODDS!? Cena said this contract was a declaration of independence. "The Bulgarian Suit" Rusev came down looking fantastic with some dude behind him. A WHERE IS LANA and WE WANT LANA chant broke out. The state of the Russian accent on this dude. Booker and JBL burying this guy live on-air. Rusev signs and Cena MAKES AN ANGRY FACE when the flag drops.


New Day is mid-ring mid-carding it up. Kidd and Cesaro cut an amazing inset promo burying the clapping. E chucked Kidd with a belly to belly. Kidd sacrifices himself for his partner - what a great team of friends. Cesaro ate a dropkick from the bull. So now the Matadores are faces again? Bray-Taker recap leads to ANOTHER BRAY WYATT PROMO LATER. Brock promo next.


Cole hyped up the promo, BUT FIRST, Sting-HHH video game promo since the DLC is free this week or something. J and J quit Seth. We're missing SEVERAL PARTS OF THIS STORY! They talked about Roman-Henry. Cole threw to the CANDID AND CONTROVERSIAL comments! Brock was put on this Earth to hurt people. It's sadistic to some, but not to him - it's what he does. What's WrestleMania? A day he gets to show up, kick ass, and get paid to so. What's he think about the people who were disappointed he beat 'Taker? He doesn't care. With his contract, if he stays, he'll be WWE Champion. If he goes, he'll be WWE Champion - Roman won't stand in the way of that. If you thought Brock wanting the title was crazy shit, him defending will be even crazier. At WrestleMania, he's going to fuck up Roman Reigns. The end. Amazing. Show came out for whatever he's doing.

WWE protecting Rowan here by having him get his ass kicked, but not eat a three count. Knockout punch. Flying elbow off the second rope to Rowan. Why not do that on PPV? Larry Zbysko HOF video. They actually tell the whole Bruno-Larry story here, but they cut to the crowd for the chairshot. This was excellent - it showed him in the NWA, AWA, and WWF as well as gave you a taste for his promo work and commentary. Kane's in the ring with geeks for an Andre battle royal preview. Henry came out and stood tall. So I think he was a face here.

Cole hyped up the first ever 6-BEING INTERSPECIES TAG TEAM MATCH on SD. 6-Being Interspecies Tag Match? Why couldn't WWE get more money for their rights deal again? "Brock Lesnar isn't coming to WrestleMania to make love. BROCK LESNAR IS COMING TO MAKE WAR! WAR!" Heyman says that what's gonna happen when Brock violates the rules? They gonna cut the show short? "YOU CAN'T BEAT BROCK LESNAR IN THE MAIN EVENT AT WRESTLEMANIA!" but the BIG DAWG CAME DOWN. Roman said people think Heyman's been talking trash, but he hasn't been. He's been hyping him up. A GIGANTIC Daniel Bryan chant broke out.


IC Title geeks 6-man tag rematch is up next. But first, Renee met with her annoyed guest at this time, Paul Heyman. He invited Roman to go to Raw next week to talk to Brock live. Barrett doing the pec dance amuses me greatly. "The most popular star in WWE now has a spot at WrestleMania!" kinda sums it up. They talked about the turd promo a ton. Faces get the edge before a break. Dean gets a tornado DDT to Harper. Booker talks about Dolph being what he always does and stealing the show. WHAT!? Booker talked about J-izzle before JBL corrects him. Cole talked about Matlock for a bit. Harper gets a powerbomb and 2 for another break. Barrett has Dolph in the post-break chinlock. Just what this match needed - a post-break chinlock spot and more bad commentary.

Thank the lord above, DANIEL BRYAN TAGS IN! Dean comes in and gets a running punch takedown thing for 2. Bull hammer turned into the Dirty Deeds for the win. Hey guys, remember when Truth just handed the title to Harper? Yeah, this was has that - but a fan has a Young Bucks sign in the background. It's okay for Barrett to job again though - he knocked guys out with a bull hammer. And a fan held up a YOU'RE A TURD sign between Dolph and Bryan. The 7 man ladder match just seems weird. JUST ADD GOLDUST TO THIS FOR GOODNESS SAKE. Give him a payday, an IC Title match, and a great match to go out on. Steph talked to HHH about things while Seth exposited about his woes. Steph, OF COURSE TALKS DOWN TO THE TOP REGULAR HEEL IN THE COMAPNY. Why is Seth talking like Tiffany? HHH then cut Seth's balls off. Steph re-cut his balls off here too. GREAT SEGMENT!

 Rusev-Cena contract signing recap. Bray-Taker recap went on for a bit, but showed a lot of last week's stuff without logos, so that was nice. We also had a full screen shot of The Man Comes Around graphic and Taker. Bray responded to it with a promo behind a red and gold urn. Bray had the ashes of the chair in the urn...I think. He poured them on his hand while music played. BRAY'S PROMOS ARE NOT WHAT I NEED WHEN I'M TRYING TO STAY AWAY AT NEARLY 11 PM!

WWE FACTS ABOUT WWE BEING AMAZING! Brock and Roman go face to face, and next week, SNOOP DOGG AND BILL SIMMONS WILL BE LIVE! Orton's out and Seth says it was all a ruse. Big "WE WANT STING" chant breaks out. He fights side by side with Orton and hits a Stinger splash to the goons and a death drop while a HUGE Sting chant breaks out. AWESOME!


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