NJPW Wrestle Kingdom 14 1-4-20 Night 1 Live Coverage

Tonight sees the first part of the grand event, with Okada battling Ibushi to determine who goes into 1/5 as IWGP Heavyweight Champion against the winner of Jay White versus Tetsuya Naito. Naito has been pushing for the title unification and after failing in his bid to win the IWGP Title from Okada two years ago at WK 12, he's the front-runner to take it all. Of the four involved, he seemingly has the least amount of prime years left. White has little to gain from being a double champ now - and has already solifidied himself as a mainline IC titleholder alongside a quick run with the IWGP Heavyweight Title last year and holding the US, IC, and IWGP Titles since beginning as Switchblade two years ago.
 

Young Lion tag is up first with Toa Henara, Alex Coughlin, Clark Connors, and Karl Fredericks out to face GBH, Uemura, and Tsuji. It's amazing how Honma can even work after what he went through. I don't want to see him wrestle in anything but 8-man tags, but it's still incredible. The announcers tell the tale about this being a battle of dojos and each dojo wanting to show its supremacy. THE PRELIM 8-MAN TAG is given more logical importance than anything in WWE. Connors grinds away and Chris talks about the decision to open up seats behind the screens before a big chop combo in the corner.

Goddamn these young lions are so good. Tremendous uppercut combos lead to giant forearms and elbows. Homa comes in for some really light corner punches before Makabe gets a northern lights for 2. Chris talks about Okada starting the decade for 2010 and now we'll see him in the main event - who knows where these men will end up. Tsuji gets a Boston Crab on Henare, who thankfully is wearing more normal shorts and not jungle getup. HE EATS A TON OF CHOPS before letting go. Henare hits a murderous lariat and a Toa bottom ends it! This was so great. Goddamn!

TenCozy faces Nakanishi and Nagata. I'm trying to think of anything on Earth slower than Nakanishi. Nagata should still at least be in the NEVER Title picture since he can still go at a major level. Chris talks about Nagata being at a 1/4 show every year since '94 and this is his 44th match in the Dome. Tenzan ankle watch...still all wonky. WHY WON'T HE GET SURGERY TO FIX THIS!? Nakanishi dumps them both on their heads and shoulders off a double Northern Lights before Tenzan gets a tag in and hobbles wild. BREAD CLUB CHOPS IN THE CORNER TO NAKANISHI! He goes up top and eats a ballshot and then Nakanishi clubs everyone. Nakanishi is just the perfect Burly Pro Wrestler-type. He does next to nothing, does it slowly, but goddamn is he great at it. Kojima hits a big lariat and wins it. They shake hands and hug - this felt like a great Tokyo Dome sendoff for all of them or at least Nakanishi, who they all focused on and who did the job.

 
An epic Tokyo Dome history video package starts things off. Kero Chan is out with a tremendous suit. Taguchi's theme keeping the '70s porno NJPW music alive is great. Takawa's out in a Zero One shirt while Otani has his usual red and black jacket on. Sano's out and Chris puts over his work in Pro Wrestling Masters.  Sasuke's out in his retro black and red outfit with a half-Sasuke/half-Liger mask. It's amazing that Fujinami is still not only wrestling, but still looks about like what he did in the '80s.

 

Ring intros put over every single person in this. SANO HITS A SUICIDE DIVE TO LIGER! Otani being a dick heel is never not great. Face wash! RUNNING FACE WASH TAKES OUT SASUKE! SHOTAI! Takawa's chops to Tiger Mask are un-goddamn-real! Taguchi's in and runs wild with hip attacks before MORE CHOPS TO TIGER MASK! Sasuke misses a swanton to Takawa. Sano misses a double stomp off the top and thankfully doesn't shatter his ankles. Liger ranas Tagushi off the top! Liger cradles him for 2, but eats an enzuiguri! BUMAYE GETS 2! DODAN ENDS IT! So logically, the youngest person with the brightest future beats the legend on his way out. Everyone hugs Liger and shows him love as he goes out to his theme. AND HE STILL HAS ONE MORE MATCH LEFT!  He gets walked around the ring and this is just perfect.

BUSHI's out in a cool suit and Shingo, Sanada, and Evil face off against Suzuki-gun. EVIL has the best gear in the biz. Evil takes Suzuki down and bronco busts him in the corner for 2. ZSJ and Minoru double-team Evil on the floor. Shingo comes in and kicks ass for a bit before mangling Taichi with chops and lariats. ZSJ eats a mid-air dropkick and sells it PERFECTLY by just bouncing off the feet of Sanada. They trade cradles and ZJS uses leverage for a 2.9. ZSJ gets an umaplata and a double armlock tapout. ZSJ refuses to release it until Sanada forces him off.

Goto has the best, most epic theme for a guy whose matches absolutely don't live up to that theme. RETURN TO THE ORIGINAL FANG REVIVES Never change, Japan. Yano hits Fale and TACKLE-MANIA! Chase Owens is cursed with Josh Barnett's genetics. Fale avoids a suplex and slams Ishii. Fale and Ishii just club away for a bit. Ushigoroshi on Yujiro ends it!

FinJuice is out and Tiger Hattori is officiating in one of his final two Dome shows. FinJuice are out dressed as 1987 - so they've got a pretty low ceiling in New Japan. He looks like a low-rent Fandango. They brawl on the ramp and Juice gets backdropped. Tama murders Juice with a stinger splash in the corner before he turns to Finlay and beats his ass. Tanga Loa is perfect in this team in that it hides his shortcomings, but thanks to Tama, he still comes off as having charisma by association. Juice slugs away. Basement lariat gets 2 for the faces. END! This match is devoid of good.

Batista bomb by Tanga leads to a crazy Sting-like splash off the top from Tama Tama's out of control frantic movements during his stinger splashes and top rope splashes are perfect - very much what I liked about Sting dives in that he'd throw his whole body into them. Magic Killer hits, but Juice saves. Superbomb turned into a rana by Finlay! Sloppy cradle gets 2 and Jado kendo sticks him for 2.9! Finlay gets a stunner, but Juice tells him to cover and gets shoved into the over to end that. Jado eats the left hand of God before Tama eats lefts and rights and the Pulp Friction leads to the acid drop and the win. This had some good moments early, dragged, but damn was this a great closing five minutes. Juice wins this and could win the US Title tomorrow too - good stuff.

Moxley vs. Archer US Title death match is up. 10 count knockout or verbal submission ends it. Mox grabs stuff from under the ring. Archer's out looking badass in red. Mox lunges and lands corner shots before a suicide dive. Archer's tramp stamp looked stupid in 2005 and looks even worse in 2020. Mox eats a chair to the face and a pair to the back. Cane shots to the head lead to a choke. Regal knee hits for Mox! Apron bomb by Archer leads to him using a young lion for a torpedo chokeslam off the apron!

 

This gets to a near-end count. A chair bridge is set up and ARCHER HITS BLACKOUT ON IT! EVD claw is on, but Mox turns it into an armbar. Sloppy border toss into the corner! Chokeslam turned into a Death Rider! Missed some of the match due to a streaming issue and see Archer caning him a bit. Now he's got DREADED JAPANESE TABLES! SPIKED HELMET TO THE FACE OF MOX! Blackout off the top is avoided and Mox hits a Death Rider off the apron through two tables! That ends it and Archer's covered in blood because the tables slashed his arms up. Mox gets a mic and says he's a gambler. He came to either leave with nothing or leave with everything. He and Juice settle it all tomorrow.

 

 

Hiromu's out looking like THE MAN. ELEVATED IS BACK FOR OSPREAY! White, orange and purple is certainly...a color scheme for Ospreay's gear. Tons of flips lead to a blocked superkick to the neck and a club by Hiromu. Apron bomb and I think an apron-jumping shotgun dropkick but the camera misses it. Giant draping DDT hits and gets 2 on Hiromu. Neck draping over the barricade leads to a neckbreaker.

Stiff kick to the gut from Ospreay before a dropkick and falcon arrow hit for Hiromu. Space flying tiger drop leads to a fakeout off a German, then a Hiromu belly to belly into the ring that Ospreay turns into the actual tiger drop! Now that was nuts! Hiromu lands the shotgun dropkick! Kick combo in the corner for Ospreay leads to a 619. Double stomp to the neck hits and a missile dropkick to the neck thankfully misses for 2.

Hiromu drops to avoid a hidden blade and the crowd goes absolutely apeshit for Hiromu JUST LYING DOWN. Lots of Ricky Morton in Hiromu's selling here - it's incredible to see. SUPER VICTORY BOMB BY HIROMU GETS 2.9! DYNAMITE PLUNGER GETS 2.9! Corner DVD is avoided leading to a backflipping dropkick and then an enzuiguri before a Robinson special. Oscutter avoided and leads to a MADE IN JAPAN FROM OSPREAY! SSP TO THE BACK GETS 2! OSCUTTER leads to a perfect tree-fall sell and a 2.9! Hook kick into a hidden blade leads to Hiromu avoiding the blade and getting a pop-up powerbomb! Kneeling forearm shots!

Standing forearms center ring! Hiromu wins that war, but loses to a high kick. DESTROYER HITS FOR HIROMU AND GETS 2! Ospreay absorbs a superkick, eats a second HOOK KICK HITS FOR OSPREAY! Stormbreaker avoided, but a C4 gets 2.9!! HIDDEN BLADE TO THE NECK! Stormbreaker inito a sunset bomb gets 2 for Hiromu! INSIDE OUT LARIAT! TIME BOMB HITS AND GETS 2.99999! 

 

What a classic this is. Hiromu builds up a massive head of spead for a kneeling forearm and then a massive head-dropping tombstone-style ermerald frosion hits and ends it! This is the greatest comeback singles match ever. It's hard to believe Hiromu came back from a broken neck and is THIS GOOD. I hope we get Hiromu with his belt and then Liger wears the Jr. 1st belt akin to Kobashi getting a ceremonial GHC Title since he defined it.

 

Naito's out and dude is over! THE ENTIRE BUILDING IS CHANTING HIS NAME! White is such a great prick heel mocking Naito. Naito snaps the neck of White on the floor before Gedo distracts him and White uses this as a chance to dominate. Jay White is so good at playing the music between the notes and he's only 27. Unreal. New Japan's formula is completely untouchable. Muta lock by White leads to him yelling him to smile for the cameras and forcing a smile. Inverted DDT/backbreaker into a headscissor/necklock.

Naito gets him in the rope so Jay being a chickenshit yells loudly for the ref constantly. Naito's knee buckles, but he slaps some life into it and goes for two flying forearms to no avail. Every single thing that Jay White does isn't meant to get him over - it's to get Naito over. It's incredible. Naito goes up top and eats the buckle. Jay stomps a mudhole into the knee. Nasty Saito suplex over the top to the floor from White to Naito. White avoids the run-up DDT when the knee gives out and a sambo suplex gets 2 for White. Kiwi crusher is avoided and slams Naito on the knee before hitting a revolving door brainbuster for 2.

 

White gets the TTO in and the crowd lives and dies with everything Naito does. PERFECT rope reach by Naito. Naito takes out Gedo and gets a kinda-sorta run-up DDT! Gloria hits for 2. This feels like one final great Dome match for Naito. Well until tomorrow's actual next great possibly final big Dome main event for Naito. Ref bump and Gedo has a chair, but NAITO ATTACKS HIM. White gets a low blow, but eats a dragon suplex. GEDO GETS KICKED IN THE BALLS! NASTY CHAIR THROW BY WHITE TO THE HEAD! SLEEPER SUPLEX TO THE NECK OF NAITO! DESTINO HITS!

Double-down off the exhaustion. Blade Runner into a slap into a poison rana by Naito! DESTINO HITS AGAIN AND GETS 2.999999! UNREAL! Destino turned into a blade runner into a frosion by Naito and then another DESTINO hits and ends it! Jay White isn't even old enough for "old school" and does it better than anyone in the business - yes, including Revival.

 

Ibushi's out and man, no company makes its stars feel like STARS like New Japan. Remember when Ibushi worked B show openers as Tiger Mask W against ACH as Black Tiger? Yeah - now he's main eventing Wrestle Kingdom against Okada for the title. A giant umbrella showcases THE RAINMAKER. He beats two giant tron monsters and then we see his gorgeous white glow in the dark getup. Goddamn this is great!

 

They start things off nice and slow with matwork. Chris talks about Ibushi basically being self-taught and didn't like being in a dojo. Okada was in the dojo and went across the world to wrestle. Ibushi gets a camel clutch and a NASTY kick to the back from Ibushi! Okada's in new gear and Rocky talks about how that can take time to get used to. Barricade draping DDT to Ibushi on the floor! Dropkick to the top from Okada leads to a nice Red Ink.

Giant HBK elbow hits for Okada. BASTARD Driver hits for Ibushi! NASTY caveman double stomp by Ibushi! TRIANGLE MOONSAULT BY IBUSHI! GODDAMN DROPKICK hits and then the tombstone! Okada lands a European uppercut and Ibushi sells it by just plummeting to the mat. Ibushi absorbs more uppercuts! Shotgun dropkick and IBUSHI DOESN'T SELL IT. Take notes, Bray Wyatt. MANY MANY NOTES. Actually fuck it, just impersonate Ibushi's matches move for move. THIS IS HOW YOU NO-SELL!

Ibushi lands a sick head kick and then socks him hard with a punch to the head. Now he's going all PRIDE-style on him! Ibushi wants a lawndart on the apron BUT EATS A TOMBSTONE ON THE APRON. JESUS! He's down and out at 18, 19! HE BARELY BEATS THE 20! NASTY German by Okada! Ibushi avoids the rolling Rainmaker, but eats a giant lariat! Ibushi wants more shoot kicks and gets them to the back BEFORE A POWER GERMAN OFF THE MIDDLE ROPE GETS 2.9!

Corkscrew German hits for Okada! RAINMAKER LEADS TO A WINDUP LARIAT FROM IBUSHI THAT SENDS OKADA FLYING! Bomaye hits for 1! Bomaye to the neck gets 2! Cro Cop kick hits and the Kamigoye gets 2.9! Kamigoye meets the dropkick! Shaking off that dropkick counter to the kamigoye. GODDAMN!

They're both down and hurt. Each landing slow forearm smashes to the jaw. MASSIVE SLAP AND KNEE COMBO LEADS TO A HEADKICK! Ibushi beats the shit out of him with more kicks! Ibushi sets up a super butterfly suplex, but Okada lands forearms and a missile dropkick is Ligerbomb-countered for 2.9! Phoenix splash misses, Okada gets the spininng rainmaker and then follow up for a big Rainmaker to get 2.99999! Best nearfall of the night! Okada grabs the wrist and lands a giant lariat. SECOND ONE HITS! V TRIGGER HITS FOR IBUSHI, but the kamigoye leads to a sitout tombstone and the rainmaker ends it! This was ungodly great! Okada battles Naito tomorrow and White battles Ibushi. What a night this was. Goddamn!

 

 

Naito comes into the ring and puts the IC belt down. He says that two years, he lost in the Dome and now he's back to redeem himself. He'll do something that no one has done - including Okada, and that's leave the Dome with both belts. Okada thanks the 40,008 that have packed the Dome. He thanks Ibushi for the toughest match of his career. Two years ago, he beat Naito in the Dome and he'll do it again and doesn't care what Naito wants - HE'S THE STRONGEST IWGP Champion of all time! And he wants the Dome to be fully sold out - holds and all! New Japan is using two Dome shows and actually using the 1/4 show to logically not only make 1/5 better, but a bigger show. Imagine WM over two nights - they'd have a sellout the first night and then half the city's population would get run over as tourists flee the city to avoid going to night two.

 

AEW Dynamite 1-1-20 - Homecoming

It's a new year and the first show I've covered since Spud died. She spent the majority of the TLC show on my lap - so that was pretty enjoyable. She made it to 22 1/2 and was the greatest cat I could ever hope to have. Super-sweet, tiny and a perma-kitten until the end. She was born one June 12, 1997 and lasted until December 16, 2019. I was lucky enough to have her be really youthful and kitten-like for 20 years and even until the last month, she could still jump around a lot. Her kidneys had been in rough shape for a couple years, and a hyperactive thyroid amplified issues too. I'm glad that her suffering was kept to a bare minimum though and thanks to Ridge Lake having a Christmas tree setup, I was able to get a 23rd set of Christmas photos with her.

Show opens with the Elite doubting themselves. Video package is too cute by one with all of these guys saying the same shit in sync. AEW returns to Dally's Place, which looked tremendous at Fight for the Fallen. Taz is in filling in for Tony. Card is rundown and the main event should be incredible. Darby burns things and walks on his hands in his pre-match video before facing Cody, with Arn who is now the Head Coach of the Nightmare Family. So is Brandi's goofy voodoo group part of the Nightmare Family and if so, is she to blame for Arn's hair loss?

 Darby gets an Oklahoma roll to counter the drop-down uppercut. Super-fast tope from Darby lands hard. Triangle disaster kick on the apron gives Cody a break. I like that Arn's pupil is suffering from non-stop moves to the arm. Figure four by Cody, but Darby gets out of bounds and locks on a nice Fujiwara armbar, but Cody gets the ropes. Darby goes up and Cody tosses him onto the ramp, but Darby lands on it and leaps onto him into a crossbody that gets countered for 2.

Inverted superplex lands for Cody, but only gets 2. COFFIN DROP ON THE APRON. Jesus. I love Ross saying it hurts both the coffin dropper and droppee. Cross Rhodes hits and gets 2.9! Darby goes for the coffin drop after Cody misses a corner charge, but Arn tells him to get the knees up and he does, so Cody gets a cradle and wins it. I love it - Arn's already paying off for Cody. SCU chats about everyone wanting a shot at their titles - even Dark Order, and no one likes spooky perverts. Sammy stirs shit up saying that Daniels is a loser who just has wrinkles, so he messes up Sammy's vlogging lens. Sammy G battles CD next week.

The stars seem like bigger stars having their trons facing the hard camera taking up so much room. It's a shame they don't run here more often - but then it would be less special. Nyla plays a fun monster while she demolishes everyone and hits the draping legdrop off the top to Shida.  Riho gets a double stomp off the top on the apron to Nyla before Britt goes for Lockjaw, but Nyla avoids. Britt gets a triangle, but Nyla gets a Rampage bomb for 2. Pair of double stomps from Riho gets 2 on Nyla before Britt superkicks her and gets a neckbreaker for 2. Powerplex from Shida to Britt and suplexes Riho into Nyla in the corner. Nyla lands a deadlift German to Shida and slams Riho onto her. Shida gets a falcon arrow to Nyla for 2.999! Riho jackknifes Britt off of Lockjaw and wins it! Nyla botches a table setup, gets it and splashes Riho through it.

Alex Marvez chats with Joey Janela before Penelope Ford ballshots him. ShopAEW ad airs. Dark Order beatdown from the last show is recapped with better camera shots. This bizarre sex cult has quite the budget for their videos - good on them. The Leader in the Simpsons was hurt by his cheapness. Trent comes out to die against Jon Moxley. Biggest JYYYOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN in history there.

Mox whips that ass until Trent gets a somersault dive and then throws the shoulder around a bit. Big shotgun lariat from Trent gets 2. Cassidy and Mox have a POCKETS!-off before a busaiku knee and a piledriver hit for Trent and get 2.5. Paradigm Shift hits on the ramp and lands the lifting variant to end it. Mox is THE MAN. Super-fun match here. JR puts over Mox's travels this week while saying that nothing is more important than tonight. Sammy comes out and calls him MOX BABY!

Sammy walks through the crowd and bums food and drinks off people saying that now he knows why he does this. Sammy wears new years gear and Jericho offers up 49% of Inner Circle of LLC and EVP alongside co-heading the group with him. They even got him a Ford GT with MOX plates.

Sammy does a wacky sign gimmick for the Picture in Picture ad. Dustin jumps him and sends him out for an apron cannonball. Hager comes out and Sammy tries to jump him into the post, but Dustin blocks and lands a snap slam. CANADIAN DESTROYER ON THE APRON FROM DUSTIN! Dustin gives him a wedgie, but the ref prevents the ball kick before Hager ballshots Dustin and Sammy wins. Page is a prick backstage to Private Party.

MJF walks out and says that the fans have their heads shoved up their asses so far they can't see shit clearly. He lists the stips and says it can only happen at Revolution. If Cody touches him AT ALL, there is no match there or ever. And before MJF faces Cody, he must face an opponent of MJF's choosing - WARDLOW!  Oh great - so now Wardlow gets Big Show'd in his first big match in the company to further a "bigger" story. MJF wants the match and he wants it in a cage! He also wants to whip him. MJF with prime Mean Street Posse as his backup would be so money.

Jungle Boy vs. Jericho is recapped. PERFECT fiery babyface promo from Jungle Boy here. He says it's a new year and a fresh start and the Jurassic Express is ready. Page is out drinking in his obnoxious shirt. Britt cuts an echoey bitchy promo about Riho coming and going while she's here all the time AND IS A DENTIST!

Kenny gets the glove of Penta and slams him, leading to Excalibur saying he demands satisfaction. Next week's show will honor Memphis legends. I hope the Memphis tribute includes a music video shot with a budget of $50 at a hotel bar and pool. Everyone does stuff at a rapid-fire pace. Omega eats a Fosbury flop by Pac at 53 after. Excalibur and JR hype up Shawshank and Page says he's never seen it. Wacky double wheelbarrow destroyer before the Bucks hit stereo destroyers! Knee to the neck by Kenny leads to a snapdragon and a Ligerbomb for 2.9. HE ABSORBED A SNAPDRAGON!? fenix is nuts! Page says "I need a drink!" PAC HITS THE BLACK ARROW BUT THE BUCKS SAVE! Brutalizer leads to the Bucks trying to save, and Matt does to save him. Fenix runs cockeyed, leaps into a V Trigger and loses to the OWA. This was nuts, but a ton of fun. Cody and The Elite celebrate. Cody's ridiculous suit is something else. They invite Hangman in, but he won't go in.

WWE TLC 2019

I wasn't planning on watching this live, but Spud's sleeping - so I might as well do that and then I won't miss anymore time with her after the event to skim through it. BARON CORBIN'S GONNA PAINT A PICASSO TONIGHT! Oh Booker... A TLC Edition of the Funhouse airs. New Day vs. Revival is up for the SD tag titles. I'm amazed the WWE-logoed belt holder has been given a wacky name like the WWE Belt Buddy. E misses the apron splash on a ladder, while Kofi eats an atomic whip into the ladder on the apron off a trust fall onto FTR.

E eats a ladder dropkick to the balls in the corner. Cole hypes INNOVATION!...as Kofi does the spot that destroyed Joey Mercury's face. E gets a stretch muffler to Dawson while Kofi bonks the knee with a ladder. Kofi lands on the rope after getting knocked off the ladder and hits a sorta-tornado DDT and then a tornado kick! SHATTER MACHINE OFF THE LADDER! E sets up some ladder bullshit all over the place. E puts Dawson on a ladder and goes up and then eats a superplex that sends Dawson through the ladder and not E. Dash splashes E and we see the internals of the collapsing ladder. They trap Kofi in a ladder away from the belts. BIG ENDING OFF A LADDER TO WILDER! Kofi bonks Dawson with a belt and sends him into the fallen ladder. Kofi grabs the belts and they win. THIS RULED!

King Corbin says stuff backstage AND DAMN IS HE TALL! Andrade is shown lowing to Humberto  on the pre-show with Zelina's help backfiring. Great - a setup where no one gets over. Murphy gets a new Generic CAW theme. Murphy does Black's sit mid-ring. They have a sit-off. Stiff stuff here as Black gets busted up and King eats a shot in the melee. Apron battle leads to Murphy getting shoved into the post and then a teep into a giant V trigger from Black for 2! RUN-UP TEEP TO THE JAW BY BLACK! Tons of buckle head trap superkicks in the post lead to a powerbomb for 2. Kamigoye leads to a Black Judas Effect and another strike exchange leads to a Black Mass outta nowhere. This was a lot of fun - make them a team though, they're going to kill each other as rivals.

Viking Raiders come down and THIS MATCH IS PRESENTED BY KFC AND A FAMILY GETS TO EAT AT A RINGSIDE TABLE. Now time for wacky family fun! The OC answers the challenge and yammer on about their trophy. Rowe plants Karl after Karl trips over him. Karl locks in an ASRAWROLLSON Chinlock. Floor brawl and a double countout. Now that's shit. They Shield-bomb The OC through the KFC table. Okay then. Professional Actor Mike Mizanin emotes about THE FIEND INVADING HIS HOME! THIS. THIS MATCH WITH TWO WEEKS BUILD. IS MIZ'S MOST PERSONAL MATCH IN HIS ENTIRE CAREER! HE IS FIGHTING AS A MAN PROTECTING HIS FAMILY!

A long Corbin-Reigns video airs that takes up about 50 years. Roman beats up the goons for a bit. Corbin rains down kneeling elbows to the chest - just like LG did before. Corbin is the most boring okay-ish worker I've ever seen. Hulk Hogan in 2011 was able to have a better match than this. AND HE COULDN'T MOVE AND COULD BARELY BUMP. Cole hypes up HARD-NOSED SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT! Dolph takes Roman out with a "SUPERMAN KICK" to save Corbin from a drive by. More goons run down. Then The Revival. It's like Taker vs. Yoko at the '94 Rumble, only a lot more boring. Dawson's plan of stand around and do nothing somehow backfired. BIG DOG SOARS! Chair and a zig zag hits. End of Days into chair ends it right around New Years 2021.

Bray vs. Miz is up and recapped thoroughly. THIS IS ABOUT DANIEL - WHO'S LIKE FAMILY TO THE WWE UNIVERSE! Why can't WWE be taken seriously again? Crazy Mr. Rogers is a more over babyface than anyone else. Bray stands on the table for a while. WHY ISN'T MIZ JUST RUNNING AFTER THIS MAN AND KICKING HIS ASS!? Miz puts Bray in the rope and nearly gets DQed. Bray eats a pair of shotgun knees and an awesome lariat before the Finale hits. Bray laughs it off. Miz going for...shades of Shayna and Penta here and failing. Shoulder snap leads to Bray smashing his shoulder into the barricade to pop it back. NO! NOT THE GERMAN DESK! THAT'S THE HARDEST OF ALL FOREIGN-LANGUAGE DESKS! Sister Abigail on the floor for Bray. Miz beats the count at 9. Mid-ring Abigail wins for Bray...so then why wasn't the title on the line?

THE FIEND appears on the tron! Bray grabs the giant hammer from before that Cole has apparently never seen before. Bray yells HE'S HERE before a MYSTERIOUS MAN IN A MAROON HOODIE HITS A KNEE PLUS! Bryan's got his 2012 look back with short hair and stubble - good, he looks way younger. CORNER DROPKICKS AND ANOTHER KNEE PLUS! Bryan lands the stomps to the chest and TEASES THE MALLET! BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT AND Bray disappears. He slams the mallet near the belt and not on it, despite the camera shot making you think he would do that. This was weird, but still better than the match.

IT'S TIME TO GET PERSONAL!? We just saw a match with Miz defending the honor of his wife and daughter! A TMZ TV show-style parody in 2019. Really now? A billion teases are done for table breakage and to their credit, they avoid it. Rusev grabs a barricade and bonks him before eating a chokeslam through it. King rattles off a few terrible wedding jokes. Lashley doesn't get him through a table on a spear, but does on a suplex on the other side in a great save and ends it.

Montez tells Lashley to get a vastectomy before a brawl between King Corbin and his goons and Roman and SD's faces. Becky and Charlotte's tag title match is up. Kairi gets tossed around a ton on various announce tables. Facebuster into the ladder from Becky to Asuka. Kairi goes under the ring and they pull her out and she blasts them with a fire extinguisher. Asuka gets a rope and goes all Texano Jr. on them. They trap Charlotte in an office chair and try to keep her in with a kendo stick, but she fights free. They tie a rope to the ladder and use that to trap Becky. I hope a train doesn't suddenly appear. Joe compliments Kairi's sailor knot and Charlotte exploders Kairi into the barricade.

Charlotte takes a nasty elbow bump on the ladder with Becky on it and gets muted. Insane elbow off the announce table leads to Becky getting her knees up. Becky frees herself and we get a lot of shrieking. Charlotte and Becky put the Warriors in chairs and land stereo things - and make sure to hold off running until they're in-sync. How nice of them.

Legdrop off the second rope to the floor through a table from Becky to Asuka. They double-team Kairi and toss her into the post. They try to double suplex her, but she gets a double DDT counter. Charlotte cusses some more and sloppily powerbombs Kairi through a table. The Warriors get beaten up with chairs to boos. Vic talks about fatigue setting in...sadly only for the women here and not viewers. Asuka powerbombs Charlotte off the apron to the floor through a table - that'll teach her to not go for goofy moonsaults and flips. Becky climbs up, but Asuka uses the rope and pulls Becky down! Asuka grabs the belts and wins. THANK GOD THIS IS OVER!

Or not! The wacky brawl from earlier is back! Corbin eats and a spear in the crowd and that's it. All righty then. That sure was an ending to a show that would never end at far too many points in time.