WWE WrestleMania 38 Night One 4-2-22

The pre-show is horrible, but at least hypes up the "Andrew the Giant" battle royal winner Madcap Moss. A generic country human sings America the Beautiful in a bland way. Good show-opening video by Mark Walhberg about catching greatness. Cole goes into this big goofy STUPENDOUS bullshit deal. McAffee loses his shit at Nakamura and Boogs, who are sponsored by Mike's Harder in this match...with the Usos, who probably shouldn't be in a match sponsored by a booze company. Boogs blows his knee out going for a double Samoan drop and SHIN loses via the 3D/1D. Amazing.

Corbin-Drew recap easily peaks with the Hobo Corbin era being run down. The joke about Drew's mother dying wasn't needed on SD to "make this personal" and doesn't help anyone. They have...a match. Clubbing. Punches. Restholds. Hard buckle whip and Drew sells it hard. Another one almost registers. Flip dive from Drew - which should be his Deadman Dive, but...just isn't since everyone does that spot. Monsterplex from Drew, END OF DAYS GETS 2, and a Future Shock>claymore ends it. DREW THEN CUTS THE ROPES WITH HIS GOOFY SWORD and something goes kablooey. Ugh.

Dom and Rey are out and DOM IS IN LOS GRINGOS LOCOS GEAR! Miz and Logan are in black and yellow looking like the Killer Bees. Logan Paul's wearing a Pokemon card chain - love it. He has more star power than 99% of the roster and in his first match, feels like he belongs. Rey is great in there as a babyface in peril against Logan Paul. Can we get Ricky Steamboat vs. Logan Paul? Frog splash gets 2 for Logan Paul. Logan eats a double 619, but Miz is legal and steals the win with the Skull Crushing Finale.

Steph gets an intro to give Gable Steveson "the McMahon rub". Becky vs. Bianca is up. Becky gets a career-spanning Naito WK-style video and is...in some hideous facial makeup. A massive EST chant starts off and a Manhandle slam is countered into a KOD, which is turned into a Manhandle slam for 2.9. Now it's time for moves! Becky misses a moonsault and Bianca gets the disarmher, but Becky gets the rope.

Awkward victory roll sequence goes off kilter a bit, but gets 2. A pair of Bexploders get 2 for Becky. Isaac Yankem Memorial draping dropkick by Becky! CROSS ARMBAR BY BECKY! Atomic wedgie to Becky by Bianca off a Rampage bomb attempt to Becky leading to an over the top rana. Suplex to on the floor by Bianca! Gutbuster on the top rope to Becky yields a 450 off the second rope from Bianca that gets 2!

Somersault kick by Becky off the top gets 2! KOD toss to the floor to Becky. Manhandle on the steps! KOD WINS IT! This was easily the best match on the show so far - and the most Mania-feeling one yet. Seth vs. Cody Rhodes is up! Great recap of this loser being a loser with all his losses. Then even worse, we get a recap of the Raw skit. Big choir intro for Seth.

MONSTER Cody chant to start things off before even Vince came out. "Time is money! DON'T MAKE ME WAIT!" before a Cody intro is great. Corey adds some greatness to this with Seth being one of Dusty's own pupils now having to face his son. Corey's acting like Cody's here for a retirement un and plays him up as old. 

Seth gets a shoulderblock and they treat it like Cody hasn't felt something like that in ages. Really now? The Sammy ladder cutter went viral - come on. SHORTARM SCISSORS here in Cody's return. Long bearhug by Seth. Moonsault block gets 2 for Cody. Barricade bomb by Seth to Cody. CROSS RHODES GETS 2! Seth hits Cody's inverted superplex for 2. Butterly driver is now the Tiger driver and Cody's having a hard time getting a good breath and just yelled "SHIT!". Cody cutter gets 2! Seth Pedigree gets 2.5.

They slug it out and Cody hits some HANDSOME BATTLE-worthy forearms. Kawada kicks to Cody! REVOLVING DOOR CROSS RHODES! The uber-mega death finish for AEW is just his debut finish in WWE. But no, the flip, flop and fly with the bionic elbow hit! ANOTHER CROSS RHODES ends it. Cody kisses the mat and they plug Wahlberg's theme and the HOF. We get one more Taker entrance.

Boogs recap and he'll be out for about six months. Subdued intro for Ronda vs. Charlotte, but Ronda looks far better being a happy babyface. Rising knee to Charlotte on the top and a draping triangle from Ronda. MONSTER LARIATO by Charlotte gets 2. Spear hits hard for 2. Top rope crab by Charlotte leads to Ronda sitting up and talking shit and wanting the armbar on the mat, but Charlotte escapes.

Piper's Pit hits, but a second leads to an ankle lock after a cradle. Charlotte gets an ankle lock and gets booted into the buckle. Rampage bomb gets 2 for Charlotte. Ankle lock with the scissor gets a close call with the rope. Charlotte falls out of her top on the figure 8 leading to a feed blackout. Charlotte eats shit on the moonsault to the floor. Piper's Pit near the rope and it's an obvious non-3. Natural Selection hits for 2.9. Ref's out and Charlotte taps to the armbar. BIG BOOT ENDS IT AND CHARLOTTE RETAINS. Well, they "protected" Ronda there - but Charlotte didn't look better than Ronda.

Owens vs. Austin is up in whatever form it will be. KEVIN STEEN IS MAIN EVENTING WRESTLEMANIA AGAINST STEVE AUSTIN. Austin comes out, milks the intro, does the ATV bit and KO gets in some great lines about Texas. Its land is bland and uninspiring - UNLIKE SAY CANADA. Austin says that he'll have 75,000 people calling him an asshole and KO isn't a fan of that - it's too vulgar. He's a dignified FRENCH-CANADIAN! AND HE HAS LIED - he wants to fight!

He doesn't want just any match - he wants a no holds barred match! Owens is stirring the drink perfectly. "I'm looking at him and I can't beat this big, beautiful FRENCH-CANADIAN BASTARD KO!" Austin says his first match was in Dallas, his last could be, and he's going to kick the shit out of him and get him a goddamn ref! AUSTIN THROWING THE RIGHT HANDS! STOMPS A MUDHOLE!

Corner to corner mudhole stomping with a between-corner beer break. Austin goes into the barricade and comes back with a lariat. Snake eyes on the barricade to KO. Austin gets posted on the floor. Crowd brawl and AUSTIN TAKES A SUPLEX ON THE FLOOR! Owens eats a slam off the barricade to the announce table. Necessity is the mother of invention and Hogan took even more out of Superstar Graham's playbook in 2011 and Austin is taking similar shortcuts here - and it's not bad, it's smart work.

Austin's bumping around more than expected - I mean, he did more physically against Miz and A-Ry, but he's taking bumps and he hasn't really done that since taking a chokeslam from Kane in '03. KO tries to escape on the ATV, but Austin hops on and suplexes him on the stage! ANOTHER ONE FOR THE OTHER SIDE. Austin kicks his ass down the aisle and GETS ANOTHER BEER! Make that two!

STUNNER TO AUSTIN! Austin recovers, hits KO with his own chair and stuns him to win. This was a bit more than I expected and Steve definitely felt better and moved better as he got the adrenaline going. MORE DRINKING AND ANOTHER STUNNER! Steve joins his brother in some mid-ring brews and stuns Byron again before drinking more. This was about perfect.

ROH Supercard of Honor 2022 - Bandido vs. Gresham

 

This show got super-loaded and for $10 with an Honor Club sub, it's well-worth it to see live with this stacked card. SW3RVE is out and just oozing stardom in every way. Alex Zayne is good and these two should mesh well. Rolling flatliner by Swerve is avoided and Zayne shoves him into the corner and gets a sloppy super rana. Apron poison rana hits and the Crunch Wrap Supreme gets 2.9 for Zayne! Rolling flatliner and the double stomp gets 2! V Trigger by Zayne, but Zayne eats the basement calf kick for 2. JML Driver ends it! This was a lot of fun, although it's clear that Zayne has work to do to get as good as Swerve is.

Ninja Mack is out to face Tully Blanchard's new singles charge - BRIAN CAGE, who looks giant and has a thigh taped up. Sasuke Special greeted with an apron powerbomb RIGHT AWAY. Cage Uncle Phil's him on the German! ANOTHER! Hook kick by Mck and then a high kick! Fallaway uranage by Cage! Drillclaw ends it! This was absolutely perfect. Lee vs. Moriarty is hyped up as a battle of the past and present against the present and future. Lethal plays into his Franchise character, so he'll work heel here. 

Lethal starts off quick with a takedown and a figure four attempt. Sonjay is shown in the crowd alongside Gary Juster and Cary Silkin. Cartwheel dropkick caught by Lee and he cradles him for 2. Forearm shivers back and forth before chops aplenty! Lethal grinds away at the knee with elbows  Chapter one of the topes hits, as does the second. Third is nixed with a pump kick and HE HITS THE THIRD TOPE! Lethal lands a series of round kicks to the leg before a Pepsi twist hits for Moriarty! Superkick and enzuiguri by Lethal before the cutter! HAIL TO THE KING TURNED INTO A CRUCIFIX FOR 2.9! Cradles aplenty get 2 for Lee! LOW BLOW BY LETHAL! AND IT GETS HEAT. It's amazing what having rules enforced can get. Lethal Injection ends it! 

Lethal attacks Sydal after the bell and Sonjay tries to save! Fantastic stuff overall. Willow vs. Mercedes Martinez is up and Willow is so great. Groundwork is led by Mercedes before Willow takes over with strikes. A round kick and superkick lead to a double-down. PPPPOUNNNCE by Willow and the straps are down! Cannonball for 2. OG Drop hits for Merceses and gets 2.9! Willow just gets to clubbering and JEFF HARDYS HER ON A MOONSAULT! Brass City Sleeper ends it - this was rough at points, but largely good and a fantastic showcase for both women. Handshake and a hug end it. 

FTR vs. Briscoes is up with FTR in '09 ROH logo gear before Mark takes down Cash and gets a headlock to show they can work. Dax spits at Jay and that gets heat. This feels like a match they'd do at a modern MSG supershow - everything feels major league here. Dax tosses a chair in and PAUL TURNER CATCHES THAT MOTHERFUCKER PERFECTLY! MASSIVE uppercut by Cash leads to him taking a bump he put so much into it!

Barrel roll tope hits on the floor and the crowd goes nuts! Jay gets sliced open on the floor and Dax's hand is covered  and Wheeler gets a sliding dropkick. Dax flips Jay off on the ropes and gets shoved off before MARK COMES IN AND KUNG FU FIGHTS! REDNECK BOOGIE BOMB HITS FOR 2.9! Big Rig is avoided, but Dax gets a slingshot Ligerbomb and a Cash splash gets 2.9! Mark avoids the Big Rig and gets 2 off a small package! BIG RIG TO DAX GETS 2.9! 

MARK DOES A WACKY KARATE KICK SPINNING ON THE POST! DEATH VALLEY BOMB ON THE FLOOR TO CASH! SUPLEX TO THE FLOOR AND LEGIT TO THE FLOOR with both hitting hard on the floor! MARK WITH A CORKSCREW PLANCHA TO CASH! FROGGY BOW HITS FOR 2.9!  BIG RIG ENDS IT! FTR HAS DOUBLE GOLD!

Young Bucks jump the Briscoes and FTR saves. FTR is willing to fight now since they're dressed to battle and SINCE ALL OF YOU PEOPLE WANT IT...and you'll get it on Wednesday! Perfect heel bit there. Tremendous stuff all-around here. This was just about a perfect match. 

Minoru Suzuki just comes out as God himself - a next-level vibe for him. Rhett is out to just his generic nothing theme and white gear. He badly needs his "Addicted to Love RHETT TITUS" song so he has some color. RHETT TRIES TO OUTWRESTLE HIM and he gets armbarred. Belly to belly hits for Rhett and Suzuki eats a pump kick. Back suplex gets 2 for Rhett. KNEEBAR BY SUZUKI! Rhett gets 2 for the dropkick

Yuta is hyped up with the Regal stuff - perfect. Yuta burns a rope break on a legbar/bodylock. La Majistrol countered by Wodds into a cradle for 2. Yuta's second break is burned and I love having Bobby Cruise track that. Yuta busting out Danielson's kneeling deathlock/forearms and Woods burns a rope break. Back and forth strikes with overhand shots and Woods gets 2. DDT BY YUTA! Knee hits for Woods and gets 2. Woods traps him in the ropes for a knee series and a big German. Teep sends Yuta out, but he rebounds in for a snap German! SPIRAL BRAINBUSTER INTO THE BUCKLE FOR 2 before a rope break for Yuta - who now has NO ROPE BREAKS LEFT. Yuta hits inverted Salivery elbows and a cradle wins it for Yuta! 

Dynamite has Christian vs. Cole in an Owen qualifier and FTR vs. the Bucks is now for the AAA and Ring of Honor World Tag Team Titles! Bandido's out looking like a star and boy does the classic belt look so much better than the newer one. Gresham challenges Bandido to lift him up from the mat and he can't do it without two hands and then gets headdragged by Gresham out of the corner!

Finger manipulation into a pin from Gresham. Gresham avoids a 12 Plex, eats it. Dives onto him and then throws him back in. Cradle wins it! Lethal comes out and says he should get the first shot and Dutt joins in with an attack before JOE COMES OUT TO SAVE GRESHAM. GOJUIRA IS BACK!