Ricochet's on the pre-show being just a dude and dressed like a fan. Bryan cuts a promo on a ref for getting in their shot because people make the division a joke. Bryan puts over both members of Heavy Machinery as legit athletes, but they choose to be silly. Roman-Drew recap features cool shots of Drew looking like a badass and beating up Roman.
Cruiserweight title three-way is up. Nice of Tony Nese to steal Ryder's gear for this match. Nese gets locked in the Gu-lock, which gets turned into a choke. Tozawa dives in with a senton to break it up and then goes to hit the fireman's gutbuster on Gulak for 2. Nese lands a double jump moonsault to Drew's legs for 2. Nese lands a dudebuster for 2 before Tozawa breaks up the pin with the shining wizard. Running Nese in the corner and Tozawa gets a snap cradle for 2 on Nese. Corner knee hits, but it only gets 2. Gulak lands the torture rack neckbreaker on Tozawa to win the title! IT'S TIME TO KICK ASS AND TAKE NAMES! UNAUTHORIZED USERS - BEWARE AND BE FOREWARNED!
A "These Boots" video airs and Becky comes out with them saying she needs to focus on Lacey and not worry about Seth. Cole calls her THE RENEGADE, THE ATYPICAL SUPERSTAR! Jesus. Lacey eats a few wacky bumps and then does a gator roll. She gets a you can't wrestle chant off a botched spot. Becky gets some random holds for 2. The Sassy Southern Belle Lacey Evans is currently getting the better of the Atypical Superstar, The Man Becky Lynch! Becky gets the disarmher and wins instantly before also being called A Rebel With a Cause.
An Ali video package heralds him as The Light to defeat darkness in life. Heyman cuts a promo backstage saying that any show with both top champions on it is a night where Brock COULD be here, and then Corbin yammers on. Sami and his love handles come down and pose on the ramp. KO and his giant greying beard make him look a decade older than he should look. KO lands 3 superkicks on Woods before a swanton gets 2. A frog splash gets 2 again. Sami gets a crossface on Woods.
KO tags in and a senton misses. Sami and E come in and Sami gets thrown around. Sami's getting a Muta-esque bald spot now. Yikes. ST-Joe hits for 2 for E. Woods lands a rolling elbow. Apron superkick to Sami and the suicide spear hits for E. KO hits a stunner to win. Good-ish match here. Ultimate Warrior and Randy Savage icons and toppers are coming to Rocket League. Okay, that's awesome. Alexa and Nikki have a very chesty meeting before Ricochet's goofy sound effect plays.
Lots of quick action to start off Joe and Ricochet - it's the best Ricochet has looked on the main roster and the best Joe has looked since the Brock feud two years ago. Sitout powerbomb by Joe gets 2. Ricochet lands a pair of enzuiguris to get a breather. Nasty German hits and Joe lands a lariat for 2. Joe catches the foot and Ricochet flies over off a backflip. Clutch is on, but Joe gets run into the corner. Joe avoids a 630 and Ricochet lands a codebreaker. 630 HITS AND RICOCHET WINS IT! Good stuff - hyped to see Rey and Ricochet go at it again. Ricochet celebrates backstage with the other babyfaces before Heavy Machinery goes out.
Bryan is a huge babyface in Washington. Shocking. Otis shimmies a bit and then gets kicked before shoving Bryan back. "Please recycle" chant is louder than any chant Impact has had all year. Bryan gets a big delayed suplex by Otis before it's moved over to Tucker and Bryan hangs on clearly. Rowan tosses Bryan in for a corner dropkick and then a corner avalanche before Bryan works Tucker's knee over on the post. Rowan splash leads to a "DRIVE A PRIUS!" chant. Bryan lands a ton of hard Yes kick and Otis wants more and gets it! Chest kicks lead to a toss by Otis. Worm and the shitty elbow hit before a catapult into a powerslam gets 2. Flying knee off the top hits! SMALL PACKAGE PINS TUCKER! This was great stuff - huge over-achievement.
Giant dueling chants for Alexa and Bayley. Not really much to the match so far beyond some corner bonks. Bayley lands a weird rolling thunder elbow for 2. Alexa gets a variety of rope chokes and stomps. Belly to back gets 2 for Bayley. Bayley dives onto Nikki and Alexa sunset bombs Bayley on the floor. Nikki prevents the twisted bliss due to Bayley hitting her and then a belly to Bayley gets the win.
24/7 Title recap. Good Brothers meet with Ricochet during his US Title photoshoot and AJ says he wants a match tomorrow. Roman vs. Drew video hypes up HOW AMAZING ROMAN IS. They brawl to start and then Shane and Roman brawl around the building. DREW GETS AN ARMLOCK! YES! It's not even time for Corbin. Drew moves from that into a neat Fire Pro-esque STF. Drew goes for the sit-up belly to belly off the top, but Roman avoids it, but eats a superplex for 2. THE BIG DOG BARKING. And here I thought the Big Dog name just sounded stupid. Spear hits and Shane pulls the ref out. So it's a DQ, right? Shane sets up a van terminator and hits. Drew MAY win thanks to the 50 year old billionaire shoe fetishist. AND IT GETS 2! Spear hits it and it's BIG DOG STRONG!
Cruiserweight title match is recapped. Dolph vs. Kofi is up and Kofi eats a series of neckbreakers. Dolph runs into Kofi's feet for a while in the corner. Kofi slaps him for a bit and gets 2 off a crossbody from the top. Dolph is laying down on Kofi's leg...doing damage how? Superkick from Dolph sends Kofi into the door, but Dolph catches Kofi before he leaves. Long, goofy ankle lock by Dolph again before Kofi gets one of his own. Shane's triangle is legit better than any of these ankle locks. They go out at nearly the same time, but Kofi hits the floor first by suicide diving the invisible man and ends it.
Roman vs. Shane/Drew is announced for Raw. MAYBE Drew can pin Roman finally! Corbin has the ring announcer rattle off all of his accomplishments before adding in that he's also Tacoma's favroite son. Seth dressing like a super sentai character somehow works. Seth threatens the ref with chairshots like an asshole. Lacey is the ref.
A "this is stupid" chant breaks out. Then an AEW chant, and then a Daniel Bryan one. CM PUNK. BOORRRINNNGG! Second rope blockbuster and a springboard knee get 2 for Seth off a slow count. Duck-under announce table bomb by Seth. Corbin nearly gets counted out - but Lacey makes it a no countout match. Corbin slams him on the apron and lands a chokeslam for 2.
Corbin beats him up with a chair until Lacey kindly asks him to stop. I was hoping Lacey would take a point away from Corbin for the chairshot. Lacey makes it no DQ. Falcon arrow on the chair gets no count from Lacey. Lacey low blows Seth and then Becky comes out after the End of Days. Curb stomp and a new ref declares Seth the winner. THEY'RE TWO REBELS WITH A CAUSE! Becky smacks him on the ass.
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