WCW Bash at the Beach 1994

 I don't recall ever seeing this show in full, so the Board watchalong is perfect. We get a video package showing Hogan as Jesus before a recap of Sting being attacked by Sting and "scratching his cornea" and Hogan beats up Sherri on Saturday Night. LOL @ Mr. T ALREADY BEING IN HERE BEFORE HOGAN'S FIRST MATCH. Jesus. IT'S 1994 and I was 10 and had no clue who he was beyond knowing of the A-Team and seeing the WM 1/2 matches.

JOHNNY B. BADD IN A 1994 PPV OPENER FOR A SECONDARY TITLE!? Shocking. He takes Sting's place here due to the Sherri angle and we get a darn fine little wrestling match here. WCW has NO ONE CLEAN UP THE GLITTHER, so Regal gets caked in it and hits a high kick! KISS THAT DON'T MISS HITS! We get a goofy sunset flip finish with Johnny not quite getting in perfect position for the counter and the cheating and then he gets high stacked to lose.

Mean Gene gives Antonio Inoki a giant intro. I'm astonished his chyron isn't the Chinese food font. Regal is offended by this and DEMANDS SATISFACTION! We get no slap, no physicality - just Inoki staring. VADER VS. THE GUARDIAN ANGEL IS UP! These two cannot have a bad match and Vader clubs him before HITTING A SPIN KICK OFF AN IRISH WHIP! One arm slam by Boss! 

VADER SLUGS HIM IN THE CORNER and Boss fights back before getting body blocked! Vader MISSES THE MOONSAULT after a nasty short-arm lariat. Race gets slammed off the top and tossed off the top. Harley gives Vader a TELESCOPIC NIGHTSTICK, which WWE didn't claim ownership of I guess, and then ANGEL GETS CAUGHT WITH IT AND DQED! LOL. This was so fun, but that finish was pretty terrible.

We get a fantastic recap of the Dustin-Studd Stable feud to set up Arn as his partner. Dustin wants THE OLD ARN ANDERSON BACK and he will in no way regret this. LOCAL RADIO DJS IN A COMEDY MATCH!? Fucking Jimmy Hart! WHY WAS THIS RECAPPED ON A PPV!? Arn sees Dustin wear this goofy bullshit and god he should just beat the shit out of him here for wearing it.

Arn does nothing to Buck before tagging out and then Terry demands Dustin come in and slams him. Dustin MISSES A CROSSBODY AND TAKES THE GREATEST BUMP DOWN THE STEPS TO THE FLOOR. WOW! Jesse, the heel, TELLING THE TRUTH that Dustin's being a glory hog and letting his ego cost him. So beyond wearing THAT OUTFIT at the Clash, then this goofy bullshit entrance gear, and that - that's three strikes bucko. Arn SHOULD BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM! Flip, flop and WATCH THE TITTIES FLY! Arn tags in and DDT'S DUSTIN! YES! Arn is fantastic! Arn kneedrops the arm twice. Callback to the "make it look good" roadside beating of Arn and the Horsemen to Dusty here.

Sherri and Flair are incredible backstage pointing out that Hogan HAS to win. TREMENDOUS promo from Sherri there - probably her best work since the Savage days in terms of coming off like a main event-level act. WCW didn't shoot many things well consistently - but they always nailed Steamboat's intro. Austin vs. Steamboat is up. Steamboat hits a "reverse kick" according to Tony. TREMENDOUS chop exchange in the corner. Steamboat gets 2 off a schoolboy. Tony says WCW is what the world is watching - the same phrase that the WWF used a decade before. 

Austin's trick knee flies backward into the groin region of Steamboat. TREE HOLD BY STEAMBOAT! Austin beats Steamboat in the rope and makes him wave at the people while he yells "hi everybody!" BACK AND FORTH TOMBSTONE AND STEAMBOAT WINS THAT ONE! Diving chop by Steamboat, but AUSTIN TRIES TO SHOVE THE REF INTO IT and Steamboat tells him to not end it! Steamboat's crossbody is countered and A CLEAN 2 COUNT HAPPENS, but HE USES THE ROPES AND GETS 3. There, one move and you get over that ropes and leverage matter. Wrestling isn't hard. I love that finish - you get the misdirect of Steamboat DEMANDING IT CONTINUE and then that being his undoing, but not immediately. He COULD HAVE WON, but Austin's cheating sealed his fate and the rope usage actually resulted in a way. Great stuff.

Studd Stable celebration and WE GET BUCK WITHOUT A SHIRT. Arn tells Gene that a year ago, he was in a hospital in England and so was Dustin. DUSTIN WANTED THE OLD ARN ANDERSON and he made a deal with the devil and the  devil called his favor in early. Sullivan and Cactus vs. Pretty Wonderful for the gold IN A REGULAR MATCH. Oh joy. LONG RESTHOLDS. More long ARMBARS. We see Bill Shaw with Hank Aaron because fuck it, that's still better than this match. Cactus hits the double-arm DDT on Paul, but Sullivan sends Roma out on a lariat OVER THE TOP to thankfully not get a DQ.  Roma trips Jack and Paul just pins him to win. Ugh.

Bockwinkel and SHAQ get an intro. Boy what a dichotomy. Shaq is over as fuck. Hogan comes out with MR. T IN 1994. Hogan came with his working shoes on and does a surprising amount of matwork before it just goes into what would be the Hogan vs. Flair formula for 15 years. They do a nice shot of the pyro after the match in the building and it just shows how they should have lit the upper deck too. "WHAT'S OLD IS NEW AGAIN BROTHER!"