The show opens up with Sting getting whipped by Vader and Barry, so it just feels like Saturday Night before WE SEE VADER HANGING STING. Okay then, that's different. Eric hypes up the white castle of fear and Eric talks to Missy and Maxx Payne gets a US Title shot as Ron Simmons' stand-in tonight against Dustin. Missy says she's going to get the interview and then Johnny B. Badd is out to his fantastic theme. Johnny is out doing his early '90s gay voice running down the main events.
Maxx Payne plays the national anthem and does a fine job of whammy-barring that motherfucker. Blondes face Bagwell and Watts, with the Blondes in matching gear - but pre-vests with wacky jacket and robes. Jesse calls Bagwell a glorified rookie and he flips over Austin on a standing top wrist lock. Bagwell's gear looks great and Watts comes in to boos whenever he attempts offense. Brian runs him over to cheers. "Why are they booing every time Watts comes in? "ARE YOU SURE IT'S BOO OR IS IT WOO!?" OH MY GOD, he's literally using Mr. Burns' logic!
Watts wearing Dr. Death hitched-up gear makes him look SO MUCH OLDER than he should be. He projects being both a rookie who knows nothing and looks like he's 55 working the seniors tour with this gear. YELLOWJACKET SUPLEX, but an Austin elbow ends it. Love it. More people need to just use positioning of a guy's finish against them. Tremendous! Wacky Sting-Vader video. Eric and Johnny chat about Flair and Missy talks about checking in with the limo driver. Missy gets frisked and escorted out before FLAIR EXITS.
MASSIVE we want Flair chant. Benoit-Scorpio is up and Scorp does Ricochet's 630 flip off the top to the mat. God, Scorpio reminds me so much in this era of Ricochet a few years ago. It's unreal how ahead of his time he was on a national level. Scorp outwrestles him on the mat with arm work. Monkey flip bridge exchanges lead to Scorp FLIPPING OUT OF A MONKEY FLIP and dropkicking him. Dude is so ahead of his time here. Crab attempt by Benoit, but Scorp flips through. Scorp superkicks him down and armbars him.
Jesse calls this an action-packed chess match and really puts them over great with that comparison. They're getting so over here just off having a fantastic match. LIONTAMER TO SCORPIO! Sleeper on the mat by Benoit and he super belly to back suplexes Scorp. Scorp gets a sunset, but he's in the ropes. Enzuiguri by Scorp and a big flying lariat. 360 STINGER SPLASH BY SCORP AND A SNAP SLAM BY BENOIT AND A SECOND ROPE LEGDROP GETS 2. Scorp gets a cradle and gets the win at 19:59! Love it - no bullshit draw, he just won by being better.
Bischoff shills the hotline - YOU COULD PAY TO TALK TO MICHAEL HAYES! Okay, so I know it's WCW and all, but WHY IS DUSTIN LOUDER THAN THE ANNOUNCER?! I demand a skit from the past where we we meet MAXX PAYNE'S TEAM OF LAWYERS, because they must be amazing. He says Norma Jean took out Ron Simmons, and tonight, he'll take the US Title and they'll make his life hell and he whammy bars more. Wild Bill Irwin is out and cracks the whip to face Davey as THE BRITISH BULLDOG before the WWF ended that.
Davey shoves him around before pressing him and he takes a wacky Terry Funk-ish bump off the ropes. BILL IRWIN GETS OFFENSE IN for some ungodly reason. Running powerslam ends it and WOW did they book Davey horribly here. Davey should've just steamrolled him. White Castle of Fear spooky mask shot. Davey chats with Tony and he's just gassed. He cuts a horrible promo before it's time for CACTUS VS. ORNDORFF! Brawling. Slam on the floor for Paul before a SUNSET FLIP OFF THE SECOND ROPE TO THE FLOOR! THIS GETS 2! SUPLEX ON THE RAILING BY PAUL gets 2.
Paul takes the brace off and HE GETS A FIGURE FOUR. Paul kneebreakers him on the floor after Mick takes a skin the cat bump off a lariat to the floor. CHAIRSHOTS TO CACTUS and now a shot to the throat. Paul motions for the piledriver and does the Hogan taunt, but Jack shovels him to the face and wins it. This was completely insane and it's held up nicely. MICK WAS INSANE! More with Missy and Eric. THE HEAVENLY BODIES ARE OUT WITH CORNETTE! The Bodies' are a perfect example of how you do a "modern day" version of a team that succeeds another - because you have a seamless transition from the last-era Midnights and throw in Tom Prichard to give him equal footing with the guys you know are top-notch.
It's basically the last big Midnights vs. Rock 'n Rolls match. Or not, as it's Tom and Stan and Eaton's just out as support. Well BOO-URNS TO THAT and Stan doesn't get to intro Corny either. RICKY ARGUES WITH CORNY and that doesn't go well. Somehow, Stan runs around and runs into Cornette somehow. Ricky takes an ass-hopping and a Liger bomb to a huge "ROCK AND ROLL!" chant. Ricky Morton as a babyface in peril has literally worked for almost 40 years as a sure-fire part of a match formula. ROBERT'S IN AND RUNS WILD. Double-team backdrop to Ricky, but A SECOND ATTEMPT BACKFIRES FOR A DOUBLE LARIAT! Inverted atomic by Ricky and Eaton RUNS IN AND ACCIDENTALLY HITS STAN! GIBSON COVERS AND WINS. This was fun. Basic high school house show match, but still fun.
White Castle hype before Maxx Payne comes out to rock that wouldn't be out of place now. Payne is in some super-shit gear here. Dustin gets a flying armdrag and lots of arm holds. They plod around FOR EVER and Dustin gets an abdominal stretch and then Payne pulls the ref and that's a DQ. Then they brawl. THIS ABSOLUTELY SUCKED. What a way to make Ric's return even greater.
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