WWF Summerslam 1997

America the Beautiful plays over the PA while we get a BISCHOFF SMELLS TURNER'S ASS sign with Vince putting his hand over his heart. PERFECT! We get pyro across the cage for the HHH vs. Mankind opener. Weird to have the opener be a cage match, and HHH is fresh off a KOTR win too. We get a recap of their feud, with them brawling all over the place last month and then Mick dressing as a camera man on Raw and eating a spear from Chyna.

Ross talks about how Mankind as Cactus Jack competed in matches with beds of nails - so steel cages won't scare him. HHH goes to escape right away, but Mick stops him.  "CERTAINLY NOT BETTER KNOWN AS, BUT KNOWN AS MICK FOLEY!" Gotta put over the power of that WWF trademark, Vince! So they set up the cage to counteract Chyna...and then set up her CLIMBING THE CAGE AND BEATING UP MICK as evidence that the cage works. Okay. Hogan/Bossman cage superplex spot, only with a bigger bump from Mick.

HHH avoids walking out and wants to deal out more damage. And keep in mind, this ring had no give to it. Ditto those cage bars. Mick has taken a hell of a lot of abuse FOR THE OPENER. Mick gets rammed into the cage a ton and boy is that just a bad idea all around. Mick and Hunter fight up top and Mick gets kicked to the ring. Mick hangs him upside down and bodyblocks him against the cage. Ross talks about how both men were trained by legends, with Kowalski training HHH and Denucci training Foley. They fight up top and HHH gets crotched and Chyna brings a chair up via her arm and throws it to HHH. Mick avoids the pedigree on a chair and catapults him into her on the cage. VIVA LA CATAPULT! AND LISTEN TO THAT REACTION. HOLY SHIT! Double arm DDT on the chair by Mick. Chyna tries to save HHH, but can't pull him out. Mick preps for a Superfly dive of his own and lands it after revealing...the remnants of a painted on heart. Giant superfly elbow hits.

Mick is out on the floor, but THE POWER OF DUDE LOVE'S THEME revives him. Todd and a purple suit introduce the NJ governor with Gorilla and the Headbangers to suck up for the company not being taxed anymore. She got a Winged Eagle and it looks like she managed to get a Reggie belt in under 20 years - good on her! Tiger Jeet and Tiger Ali Singh are shown in the crowd.  Goldust vs. Pillman is recapped...somewhat. This is a battle over a dress. Okay.

Pillman jumps him and Goldust slugs him in the corner and kisses him mid-ring. A slam to the rope off the top could've gone so much worse than it did. As it is, it looked like a twisted ankle and a hard bump on the apron - and it's no wonder why he was on pain pills constantly even in this state physically. Pillman manages a flying clothesline off the top for 2 and honestly, it looked great given how messed up his ankle was.

The Godwinns come out with a rebel flag...HERE IN 1997 as we get a recap of the doomsday device breaking Henry's neck. Bib overall-only Godwinns is a perfect heel redneck look. A HOSS FIGHT BREAKS OUT! Animal kicks the shit out of Dennis Knight in the corner and double clotheslines them down.  Henry gets shoved head first into the steps and then eats a legdrop from Hawk. Animal works the arm for a bit for some reason. Capt. Lou rambles for a bit at ringside. Long bearhug before Hawk runs wild and Vince calls him "a one man gang". NECKBREAKER TO HENRY gets 2 when PIG saves. Revolving door corner lariats and they spike piledrive Henry to win it. Good way to watch up their finish - they should've done that more often.

Fans arrive to maybe win a million bucks, I think. Todd's Dr. Evil impression is shockingly contemporary for the summer of 1997 - now, Vince is probably just getting it. They pick numbers and a fan doesn't pick up and fails to win a million bucks. THIS WAS ONLY FOR PPV. WHY WASN'T THIS ON THE PRE-SHOW!? We get a ton of great shots of Sunny and also Sable is around doing stuff. Folks don't win a million, but everyone who answers got $5,000 in a savings bond.

Ken Shamrock vs. British Bulldog is hyped up...with dog food on Raw. I have ZERO recollection of any of this. HBK vs. the British Bulldog is hyped up for One Night Only - so that's sure a weird thing to do BEFORE THIS MATCH. Ken kicks his ass all over the place. Ken gets a sunset flip for 2. Ross talks about Davey being a veteran and his first Summerslam being 1988 with Dynamite Kid. Davey gets hit in the head with a can of dog food for a DQ. Okay, so I didn't see that being a finish - but he "snaps" to get that over. RNC is a shoot after years of the sleeper being treated like a transitional move or worse, Beefcake's finish, for eons was always a tough one for this era. Bulldog is the character babyface here BUT KEN IS OVER AS FUCK standing belly to belly throwing everyone.

Vince tells the tale of each guy being a shade of grey here as Todd interviews HBK backstage. DOA vs. Los Baricuas is up. "We live together, we ride together, AND GUESS WHAT ELSE WE DO TOGETHER..." Gang Warz brawling is shown and then the match features lots of brawling and Vince can't tell which biker is which. Ahmed lays out Chainz with...what they call a Pearl River Plunge on the floor to get the win for the other enemies of their group. Then all the factions fight and Crush threatens to run guys over. Ahmed's knee brace on his right leg is ENORMOUS!

Owen vs. Austin is hyped up by Owen pinning Austin at Canadian Stampede. I like that GETTING A PIN IN A TEN MAN TAG leads to this - it's portrayed as a big deal JUST PINNING HIM. Also, if Austin can't kick his ass, he'll kiss it. Cole talks to Austin about HAVING TO KISS OWEN'S BACKSIDE if he loses!

Owen jumps him and attacks the knee, but the Thesz press punches help Austin. After a fast start, they slow it down with holds - which is normally odd, but here, it works because they hook you in with the brawling and use the wrestling as a new base so you don't boo it or pelt it with boring chants. Owen stomps the arm on the steps and puts Austin the Andre position on the ropes. Rana attempt by Owen is met with a powerbomb! Owen lands a slam and the flying elbow for 2. Austin rolls through a crossbody for 2. Owen gets a running DDT for 2 - now there's a move I never recall him doing. Owen gets a sleeper, but Austin jacks his jaw. "Both men have won King of the Ring - BOTH MEN HAVE WON SLAMMYS!" - Ross looking to keep his job a bit longer.

Austin slugs him and Owen lands the seated tombstone. Owen stalls as Austin in real-time tries to move his arms. Here, the stip helps as Owen can't just point to his ass and they talk about him suffering a possible stinger. Austin moves a bit and gets a cradle that Owen is a pro for and at least pins himself down further. Austin's legs go out on him and the refs help him out. King puts over the cradle as being something caused by Owen's head bouncing while Ross says that he was caught by surprise.

Hart Foundation vs. HBK/Taker stuff is recapped. "Thank you for letting me still be your hero!" What a great line. I love seeing all the Bret-Vince brawling. PATRIOT BEATS BRET ON TV DISTRACTION SCHOOLBOY FOR THE WIN in 1997. Astounding. "In the shadow of New York City!" - old habits don't die for Vince. Bret wants the fans to stand for the Canadian national anthem and he dedicates the match to his fans around the world. What a brilliant act this was.

HBK gets his full intro as ref - AND IS WEARING PANTS! Taker and Bret brawl around for a bit before Taker gets a bearhug. Bret works Taker's lower body over, but gets clubbed in the corner. Bearer comes down and Taker is locked in a figure four, but DEADMAN RISES UP and reverses it. Pillman and Owen are out and Bret works the knee over.  Chokeslam from Taker leads to him forcing HBK into the ring and BRET GETS A DISTRACTION SCHOOLBOY THAT FELLED HIM, but it only gets 2.5. I like that the distraction schoolboy that finished Bret on TV only gets 2.5 here - crushing him a bit more mentally.

Bret backbreaker posts Taker and then hammerfists him off the second rope. Bret suplexes him for 2 and the DEADMAN RISE hits. Russian legsweep hits and BRET'S CORNER BUMP GETS 2! Outside-in chokeslam by Taker gets 2. Taker goes up for old school, but Bret kicks the rope out of him. Bret gets a sharpshooter and then gets a RINGPOST SHARPSHOOTER, which I have no recollection of at all. Bret beams him on the head with a chair hard and ONLY GETS 2!

HBK sees the chair in the corner and asks Bret about the chair, which he didn't see before and goes to chairshot Bret, but BRET MOVES AND TAKER EATS ANOTHER SICK SHOT TO THE HEAD and that's it. Unreal heat for all this.