Thursday, February 14, 2013

TNA Impact 2-14-13

Spike pre-show hype is talking about an 8-man tourney for a world title shot. The recap vid talked about Garett and Wes turning against Angle and Hawk Hogan, and made the tag titles seem important by showing Aries and Roode winning the gold as well as showing Taz joining the Aces and reinstating Bully while showing clips of the table match from last week. Hell of an efficient two minute deal. New crowd shots for this show, including a nice showcase for the KILL STEEN KILL Cena-style shirt. They had THE greatest shot of the crowd yet when Hogan came out - made it look like there were 50,000 in the joint. Loved Hogan calling Daniels a man who thinks he's a superhero and putting Magnus over huge. Loved the logic of pitting the tag champs against each other because they were the last two world champs. Sting's white, black, red, and blue paint setup looks good. Sting promising to TEAR HEADS OFF is amusing. Magnus-Daniels is next - megapop anticipated.

Taz bringing up "be a star" constantly during Magnus-Daniels was amusing. Him praising Daniels for the best moonsault attempt ever was funny too. Loved Taz insulting the ref for tossing out Kaz's $20 managers license, then Kaz got punched and took a HYUUUGE bump on the ramp. Magnus hit a great lariat on Daniels leading to the flying elbow for the win. Magnus does the best flying elbow in the business and it got a lot of replays. Great visual with Mangus's name in lights above the ring after his win. Bully gave Brooke a bunch of exposition about the storyline in case she forgot it while at the same time saying it's Valentine's Day and they're going out on the town in London! Once Bully puts his ring on - he forgot it in the bathroom sink at the hotel...DUN DUN DUN!

Magnus cut a fine promo on the Aces for shattering his dreams for months. Not sure I agree with him saying he has what it takes to be World champ - I'd have set my sights clearly on the TV Title given the Aces storyline. Joe's gear is now like his old gear but with the boxing style - looks awful, like Brock's generic gear in WWE '13. Then they played some terrible-sounding audio of Angle talking about the IOC's decision to eliminate wrestling. Taz agreed with  Kurt that it was insane, and Tenay agreed with him - I liked Tenay and Taz being able to not just blindly hate each other. Having at least some common ground makes things seem more believable. Angle came out in longer tights and thigh tape. VINTAGE SAKU! They went through their usual stuff for a few minutes before a break. They recapped Impact on the Road during the break. Could've done without saying that the Aces were texting him a bunch of LOLs when word of Bully's quad injury got out. Made them sound like a bunch of teenagers. I LOLed when Joe no-sold the Angle slam, leading to a choke, then the ankle lock. Garett and Wes came out to destroy them both after they'd already hit each other with finishers...but got their asses kicked anyway. That was hilarious. Dixie gave the most boring pep talk in human history to the Blossom Twins and some guy who wasn't named while wearing a blue table cloth. Put some fucking graphics up for these peoples' names for goodness sake

The dude is Party Marty, whose name and look scream opening match guy. Blossom twins look good. They'll face Gail, Tara, and Jessie. Could be quite fun...although four of the people have very little experience. Party Marty running into Jessie in the corner, slapping him, then cheering for himself made me wish Jessie would just destroy him. Tenay talked about Billy Robinson to tie the UK show into Bellator. Marty hit a missile dropkick, but overshot a suicide dive by a billion miles and crashed with the metal railing. Gail beat a Blossom with the Eat Defeat. Gail bragged, then insulted Taryn whose tits were focused on extensively, and demanded a match with Tara. Brooke came out and made a 4-way with herself at ringside to ensure that no bullshit happened. Neat. They replayed Dixie's awkward announcement from Bellator last week. Should've just shown the dates instead. They recapped the two title qualifiers from earlier. Then Aries and Roode argued over which titles they were going to go after - could've done without Aries saying he didn't want the X title, but otherwise, this was fine.

Storm-RVD is up. Tenay and Kennely talked about Storm having his last shot taken from him by Roode, and thankfully left out much of his history of failure. Wouldn't play up well for this match since it's setting him up for more failure. Tenay talked about the history of RVD and Storm's matches, citing their Lockdown '10 match and their battle in the BFG series while Kennely put RVD over as a former world champ who held two world titles at once. Really made this seem like a more important match as a result. LOVED RVD selling the Closing Time like his chest was caved in. Let's Go Cowboy/RVD dueling chant helped it too. RVD going for the chairless Van Terminator for the first time in years was a great way to make this seem important - he seems way more 'on' here than usual. Superkick got the win for Storm - this was a pretty good match - way better than RVD's X division matches. Storm beat a current champion in this, so that should really count more than anything else. Joseph Park asked Hulk Hogan for a shot against Jeff Hardy - he's made Vote For Park buttons and posters to politic properly! This was tremendous and made me forget all about Taz's horrible "if my aunt had nuts, she'd be my uncle" statement earlier.

Brooke asked for her husband to get the title shot, then said they'd only been in the UK for three days...kinda odd for three weeks of TV. Liked Hulk saying he had be objective and be fair to everyone on the roster. Roode and Aries came out for the main event - Roode got booed but Aries got a huge ovation. Roode cut the usual heel promo about titles - they all mean nothing and need to be brought back to a state of prominence. Loved Aries thanking the fans for stating his name - but he already knows it! They went for a double fingerpoke of doom, eliciting a POKE POKE POKE chant. I loved them getting mad due to them being unable to agree on who would throw the fight...this rules! Angle will be live on Bellator from NC, exposing that Impact was taped. Eh, hardly a big deal. Loved each guy trying to out-cheat the other. Aries nearly being dropped to the floor during a superplex was scary. LOLed at Roode stealing Eddie's fake chairshot spot, then Aries re-stole it. Hernandez and Chavo came out in Aries and Roode's shirts on the ramp, and then they scrambled around trying to prevent the other from getting in to break the count. This ruled. Hogan and Sting had a meeting and then Sting gave Hogan directions to the ring...while exposing that Wembley's backstage area looks like the most cramped cruise ship ever. Hogan came out to name the contender, but was interrupted by the Aces, who couldn't attack him thanks to Bully and Sting ARMED WITH A CRICKET BAT. This was a thing. Great show overall.

Screens -



No comments:

Post a Comment