Sunday, December 4, 2016

WWE TLC 2016

Pre-show features Peter Rosenberg and Alexa shining nicely talking about Rey and Trish being her idols. She had great faces throughout this. Ascension, Hawkins and the Villains against Crews, AA, and the Hype Bros. Mojo does a wacky dancing taunt bit from No Mercy before doing a seated double chop to the chest - thus making The Worm look like a stiff shot by comparison. A long chinlock helps this nothing 10-man tag out a bunch. TWO OF THEM! YES! RUNNING GRAND AMPLITUDE! Well, that was a good finish.
JBL compares Orton and Bray to Brody and Hansen. Heath and Rhyno come out and Rhyno only does his jog for maybe 2 seconds. It's amazing to think that Rhino was just a dude in TNA for eons, disappeared, and then just completely revived his career and is back in WWE as a full-timer and a champion to boot. Great story for him. Orton stomps away at Heath before Bray lands some shots to the back of the head. Wyatts rightfully win the titles after an RKO.

Dean and AJ cut promos with Dasha and Renee respectively about their match. Jesus. Did Nikki eat anything from Tuesday through today? She looks Brie-level skinny now. They do some weird bit where Carmella does a rana setup on the apron, but just gets shoved on her ass on the apron before doing a full rotation rana that somehow sends Nikki sideways into the steps. The ref counts on the floor in a no DQ match before Carmella kendo sticks her in a tree of woe. Nikki escapes the code of silence with a kendo stick. Disaster kick off the apron by Nikki. Nikki canes her in the ass. Nikki sprays her for 20 years with a fire extinguisher and then beats her with a TKO. Well, Nikki just killed Carmella dead. Carmella brings up the Survivor Series beatdown on Nikki and says Nattie did it. Well, obviously. JBL IS SHOCKED!

We get some bizarre Kay ad with Nattie and some fan who wants to propose to his wife in the ring. Great IC Title hype video here. Really shows off the gulf between eras for the belt. Bryan meets with a brunette interview human about the IC Title match. Dolph is out, meaning that the CHAMP COMES OUT LAST! Nice American flag gear for Dolph. JBL rants about how Miz brought the title home to SD beating Sami. How can Miz bring it "back home" when it never left?
Nothing really too amazing about this early on. They do some basic shoves into the ladder and a drop toehold spot on the floor. They tease a powebromb into the ladder on the floor and deliver a spinning DDT onto it - well, that was slick. Miz dropkicks a ladder into his gut in the corner. This is like a less exciting version of the match you could have in the video game. Miz's INTENSE RUNNING DROPKICK almost makes a sound against the ladder. He's the king of soft style. Miz destroys the knee and gets a MIZ! MIZ! MIZ! CHANT! FIGURE 4 WITH THE LADDER! This must be in 2K18.

Miz hits a finale on the ladder and goes up top, but Dolph takes the ladder and hits his knee - resulting in a MOTHERFUCK from Miz. SLINGSHOT POWERBOMB INTO A CORNER LADDER! Yet another huge MIZ! MIZ! MIZ! chant. Miz is legit getting over as a main eventer working with Bryan - have him lose this and go into the WWE Title picture. They tell the story of Miz overcoming the odds to leave WM as the WWE Champion who is now climbing a ladder with one leg to win this match...and how can I boo him? Dolph climbs up and eats two kicks to the balls and Miz retains. Miz thanks Bryan for motivating him and says it's day 19 of the reunion tour while Dolph should get a participation award. 

THE DREADED CHAIRS MATCH is in fact an apt way to describe this encounter - just not for reasons they would ever intend. Why is Kalisto dressed up as a Mexican jobber version of Rellik? Double-jump suicide dive. A GOOD LUCHA THING FROM KALISTO! Kalisto tosses a chair at him on the floor and then moonsaults him with a chair on his gut. He adds some chairs to the pile and goes up top and eats a chairshot. End of Days on 10 chairs ends it - fun match, will do in a game at some point.
A generic brunette human chats with Nattie about the Nikki angle. She puts Becky over huge - so she'll seemingly be costing her the match tonight. Outstanding hype video airs for Bliss-Becky making it seem like a big deal. They fight on the floor for a bit before Bliss gets swept on the apron. Alexa hits the shotgun knees and does the surfboard stomp. They go for...something off the apron that just doesn't work, so Bliss tosses her into the steps. Really off night for Becky between these forearms and whatever happened on the apron. They re-enact the SD table spot tease, but the table is knocked off.
NONE OF THE FOUR MEN AT THE COMMENTARY TABLE POINT OUT THIS IS A REFERENCE TO SMACKDOWN. STO counter to the Bexploder. Wonky sunset flip punch leads to the Insult to Injury. Becky goes for an AA through the table, but Bliss DDTs her on the frame. DISARMER ON THE TABLE LEG! Drop toehold into the table. Alexa rakes the eyes and powerbombs her off the apron through a table to win! Generic brunette - She is. Do-ing. A good job. Of acting like. A hu-man. Be-ing. Becky is upset. Well good - a loss mattered.

Another silly Kay ad. Dean comes out. BOY LISTEN TO ALL THOSE...CHEERS FOR THE TOP HEEL! They fight on the floor and Dean does a bar fight spot running him down a table face-first. AJ eats a beating, but comes back mid-ring and tosses Dean onto the rope off the ladder. Dean hits EZ Money's old WCW finisher on him through two chairs. AJ's gear gets torn up revealing an ass cheek. AJ snap suplexes him through a corner table. AJ's ass is cut up.
Dean SETS UP A LADDER ON ONE ANNOUNCE TABLE AND ELBOW DROPS AJ THROUGH ANOTHER ONE! Dean climbs up but THE FOREARM HITS! THAT FOREARM WAS GORGEOUS! They slug it out on the ladder and just fall for some reason. Clash attempt leads to Dean spinning his upper ribs into the ladder. JESUS. RIP AJ's upper ribs. AJ goes for a powerbomb over the top, but eats a rana. ASAI MOONSAULT INTO THE DDT ON THE FLOOR! The fun of doing this crazy shit in the game is that no one actually gets hurt. Good God is AJ nuts.SPRINGBOARD 450 OFF THE TOP THROUGH A TABLE ON THE FLOOR. Yup. Certifiable.

Ellsworth comes back and AJ goes to Clash him, but Dean saves and DDTs AJ on the steps. AJ comes back in  AJ gets punched to the outside, but Ellsworth tips the ladder and sends Dean through a set of tables on the floor. AJ climbs up and wins.

Screenshots -


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