Thursday, March 14, 2013

TNA Impact 3-14-13

Loved them starting with the good parts of the Hogan/Bully promo - made the world title match clips seem like a bigger deal. They also pretty much aired all the important parts of the post-match promo too. It really made it seem like you missed a big event on Sunday. Crowd shot of the arena was quite impressive. They showed a hilarious shot of Brooke attempting to act while hyping up us getting her reaction later - I don't know why, nothing can top that. Tag title match starts the show. So much for that - the Aces killed the Mexicans. I don't know many Xes are in D'Lo's shirt size, but more are needed because his gut was still getting exposed here.

Bully came out with a guy looking like Santa turning his back to him - sadly, his theme is gone, but a remixed Aces theme rules. Loved seeing Taz hug Bully since it was 14 years ago when they would have world title matches with Bully as a placeholder guy, and here they are with him as the world champ. This was great until Garett held the gold. Bully got a lot of cheers saying he screwed Brooke. Bully said they did in one night what the NWO never could do...and didn't specify it. Shame they couldn't just call this group the Biker World Order. Velvet and Mickie face Gail and Tara next.

They recapped the Gail-Taryn deal and did an INSET PROMO for Gail - nice to see them do those. Tara came out in Punk-like Chicago flag stuff. They said he's from it...but he's billed from CA. Crowd is super-hot for everything tonight, which is a great start for Impact on the road. Velvet took a bump and then adjusted her hair, which was hilarious. Then she did an RVD pointless roll into an armdrag. This went like two minutes before an ad break. Great tarantula from Tara after the break. Taryn got pie-faced, then slapped Gail leading to a Thesz press from Mickie, a slick Widow's Peak from Tara, and Velvet won with her finisher. Lotsa booty in this one. They recapped the earlier bit with the Aces. Their new clubhouse in the boiler room with Sears Center chairs. I think Bully's phone cost about 10 times more than the set.

They came back with a rematch of the Robbies. Christy's cleavage was impressive and Taz talked about the boys needing him on their side. Well, I guess they could use a supplier of steroids. Freakbuster won in like a minute and got a big FEED ME MORE chant. Sting was sad and went into Hogan's office. The Aces read through the merch and were upset over the lack of Ace merch there, then picked a guy whose ass to kick from a catalog. Sorta VINTAGE LAURINITIS! Hogan was all pissy at Sting for what happened, examined the storyline thoroughly, and said he was dying. They recapped AJ being an emo biker now and showed that hilarious face of his from two weeks ago both in the vid and in his hype graphic.

Great shot of Chicago itself to make this seem like a big deal. Sting walked past some basketball hoops while Roode and Aries came by in DIRTY HEELS shirts. Loved them blaming Sting for everything just like Hogan. Aries wasn't happy about not being able to defend the titles against "the Mexicans". Sting got all pied off at them and said he wanted a fight, so Roode left and Sting finger boinked him. This ruled. AJ didn't come out, but Bad Influence did as the LOD! Daniels had painted-on Hawk hair. Amazing. All hail the Legion of Boom! This led to Storm-Daniels, which is a shame - I'd have loved LOB vs. The Beer Warriors. Kaz should have a Wall Street Journal with him if he's going to be a manager. Storm won after his moves, and got over huge. They really should have him win the TV Title at Slammiversary and win the world title at BFG. AJ came down to save Storm by hitting Kaz and a fan held up a giant BRING BACK IVELISE sign, then he hit Storm. So he sorta turned heel, but kinda didn't. Neat. They aired a Brico-Angle video with some terrible audio mixing. The commentary was either too loud or hard to hear. The Aces beat up Angle backstage and someone there snickered like Muttley. 

Joseph Park, the hometown boy, came out and was super-excited to be in his hometown! Loved his attempt at a cheap pop not working one time, so he went with something else and it worked. Then Morgan came out looking like a jacked Home Depot shopper in a tanktop and jeans. He dared to insult Park and man did he not look big next to Park. Park could stand with being insulted, BUT DON'T YOU DARE INSULT CHICAGO! Morgan hit a cheap boot on Park, then blew his nose on the crowd. And he's going to face Park next week. Why he'd give him a week to recover, I have no idea.

Bully cut a promo challenging Hogan and saying that they've taken out Chavo, Hernandez, and Angle, and they'll come to Hogan if he doesn't come to them. Brooke's video showed her knocking PIZZA BOXES OFF A TABLE, and call him a fucking asshole, with half of that being beeped and it showed off the crowd throwing shit into the ring which really helped sell that as a big deal. Loved Taz saying Roode and Aries need to wash their feet because their shirts say dirty heels. Crowd popped so loud for Sting that you couldn't hear the commentators - fun to see him get a Road Warrior pop in Chicago.

Huge dueling chant between Sting and Aries fans. Aries did an awesome job creating movement for Sting, who actually hit the guardrail stinger splash for the first time in eons. They went to a break with a loud crowd going nuts for everything. Loved Aries doing his cocky pose in the corner, then Sting lifting him up from a headlock into it again before kicking him out of it. Loved Roode getting ejected and spinning around every time the ref pointed at him to leave.Someone called Aries the fucking man, unbleeped, after a suicide dive. Taz said that Kenely was rubbing off on him and he was getting good...pretty sure he meant the opposite of what he said there. Loved Aries not being able to do the scorpion deathlock, then yelling at Sting for instructions. Missile dropkick got no-sold, which Aries didn't know while he was doing the howl. Big gorilla press slam from Sting made Sting look like the Sting of old for a bit. Great corner dropkick from Aries leading to his own Stinger splash. Sting countered the brainbuster into the deathdrop and got a 2.9. Tremendous nearfall that lived up to this THIS IS AWESOME chant before it. Scorpion deathlock was locked up but the Aces prevented the win. This was tremendous - easily Sting's best match since that TV match with Roode a year or so ago. They cut away awkwardly while Bully called out Hogan. He came out and said that the TNA roster can do whatever they want to the Aces, so a giant brawl broke out between the united TNA roster and the Aces and 8s. A bit odd to see this right after the ROH angle doing the same thing, but it worked well. Well, except for when Joe just stood behind an Ace guy doing nothing while another TNA guy got beaten up. Aces eventually won this war thanks to weapons. I hope TNA is saved by the mysterious El Kabong with a guitar.

Screens -



No comments:

Post a Comment