So we've got next to nothing announced before the show beyond a few things added today. LACEY VS. NATTIE ON THE PRE-SHOW! JOY! They have a wrestling school trainee match that goes way too long. Nattie gets a win off the sharpshooter, so maybe this terrible feud continues. She wins and then forearms Lacey down. So this got no one over.
Lots of long SD recaps to fill time. Toy ad shows Braun destroying a car that just so happened to match the one in the skit. A wacky TNA Lockdown-style ad airs for HIAC. Sasha vs. Becky starts things off. Of course we get brawling outside the cell to start because the brawling begins before the cell fully lowers. Becky gets an awesome missile dropkick off the apron onto Sasha propped up on a chair on some kendo sticks for 2. NOTHING IS TOPPING THAT. HAVE IT END THE MATCH. Meteora off the top through a table gets 2 for Sasha.
Sasha locks on the crossface with a kendo stick before she slams Becky's face into a chair trap on the cell. Bexploder off the top onto chairs leads to a disarmher to win it. Good-ish stuff - got great at times. Network issues logged me out on X1 and when I come back, it's Bryan and Reigns against Rowan and Harper.
Total nothing match. Bryan plays a face in peril a bit and Roman does his sleeping bit. Roman spears Rowan through an announce table. Bryan goes for a super rana off the top to Harper, but it's countered into a superbomb for 2. Half nelson suplex on Bryan showcases all the welts on him. Superman punch>knee>spear end it and Roman beats Harper. Good finishing sequence - boring match. Roman wants a handshake, but Bryan denies it until he gets people fired up and then he wants Roman to want it and then they hug.
Orton vs. Ali is set up, apparently due to something on the pre-show I missed. Ali's tron almost makes him seem like a star. THE INSPIRING ALI. Poor guy's fucked. He gets all banged up, but sends Orton flying over the announce table. Ali counters an RKO with a handstand into a crucifix before falling to an RKO. "a game performance" is code for Virgil got a 1.5 count on Bret Hart in a WWF Title match to show he was a worthy challenger.
The Kabuki Warriors are randomly heels now and the announcers say that maybe we haven't seen them at their best. ya don't say! A wacky spotlight hits Kairi as she goes for the elbow and Nikki gets her feet up. ASUKA WINS WITH EVIL ASIAN MIST TO NIKKI after a knockout kick. VIVA LA TAJIRI!
Long SD recap leads to The OC vs. The Viking Raiders and a mystery man - BRAUN! AJ loses to Braun off a punch to counter the forearm. AJ sells this like a total KO punch and with Braun being built up for Fury, good.
Corbin vs. Gable is up in another rerurn that no one could possibly care about. This for some reason deserves a long, drawn out video package to fill time. Gable beats Corbin to no reaction and Corey makes a shortcake joke. Truth beats Tamina thanks to a Mella superkick after she threatens Funaki. AFTER CHARLOTTE AND BAYLEY MAKE IT TO THE RING. Fucking hell. Charlotte works the knee for a while. Charlotte gets busted open and wins the title with a figure eight to become a 39393rd time champ.
Backstage, Gable asks how Corbin feels to come up...short! Corbin kicks his ass. THAT'LL TEACH YOU FOR TRYING TO GET OVER ON SOMEONE TALLER THAN YOU! Seth's out followed by THE FIEND! This all-red light looked worked for Kane 20 years ago, just like the mandible claw did for Mankind - combining two things that worked 20 years ago doesn't equal something that works in 2019. THERE'S SUCH A WEIRD ENERGY HERE IN THE GOLDEN ONE CENTER HERE FROM THE WWE UNIVERSE!
Sister Abigail into the cell. Superkick party leads to a stomp and Bray just pops up. Abigail hits for 2.5. Bray grabs a mallet and Dio says WE'VE SEEN WHAT THAT MALLET HAS DONE TO RAMBLIN RABBIT to hype up this WORLD TITLE MATCH!
Superkicks and two stomps hit before a pedigree and another stomp gets 1! More stomps and more stomps get boos. This is like Randy Savage's elbow being killed for the Warrior match in '91 - only that was GOING TO BE A RETIREMENT MATCH, so it was okay. Seth's killing his finish and has to return to wrestle on Raw tomorrow. Seth grabs a chair and smashes his head for a 1 count. He puts a chair on Bray's face and grabs a ladder and smashes the chair with the ladder for 2. That doesn't work, so Seth grab's a lighter object in a tool box and smacks him with it a bunch to boos. Seth grabs a sledgehammer and uses it to lose by DQ. So a MALLET is okay, but a sledgehammer, which weighs less, is a DQ?
AND THEN BRAY GETS THE MANDIBLE CLAW ANYWAY. So Seth still looks like a loser, but he has the Twizzlers belt. Bray hits him with Abigail twice - once on mats, once on the bare floor. Mandible claw with wacky lighting closes the show. SO WHY NOT HAVE BRAY WIN THE TITLE!?
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