Monday, July 20, 2015

WWE Raw 7-20-15

Before Raw, they had Cole say that Taker DEMANDED to start Raw. The PPV recap really put Taker over as THE MAN. They got some epic shots in there and Taker came out to start the show. Byron talks about loving JBL's wars with Taker, and him having more matches against Taker than anyone. Boy was that ever a great use of him in hindsight. Cole talked about The Streak ending on that night - March. Taker got the mic and growled and said he's a vengeful grim reaper - I like it. Taker with the salt and pepper beard is so badass. Then he kept talking. He says that he'll conquered what hasn't been conquered and he'll make Brock rest in peace. WOOHOO, thank God we get HHH and Steph in this quarter hour to talk about how great this is! It's just outright a marketing deal - not a personal grudge then. Cole talked about how STEPHANIE REVOLUTIONIZED THE DIVAS, and we'll get Charlotte vs. Brie next...with the Total Divas theme readying the match.

Divas recap from Raw...LOL @ the Superstars bordering for this recap. What a sweet moment between Ric and Charlotte...why couldn't we see that on the PPV instead of hearing from the Pre-Show panel? Nice of them tell us that Brie ducked because the camera angle made it appear that Charlotte just decided to hop over the top rope onto the floor and do a belly flop like a moron. Between the awful camera work, BAD commentary, and this whole presentation being a failure, I have no faith in this.

I don't know what's worse - LET'S GO NIK-KI! or the clapping Brie Mode chant. Brie does Bryan's kicks poorly and a dropkick. Everything involving Team BAD that isn't Sasha is awful. They show the Taker-Brock graphic and we find out that Roman faces Harper tonight. Goddamn, the more we get of HHH and Steph being involved in this Brock-Taker stuff, the less I care. We get HHH verbally berating and cutting Heyman's balls off, which is quite hilarious. Miz comes in and gets avoided, and then buried by HHH for looking like Obi Wan and saying he doesn't care about Miz.

PTPs came out for a match against Matador. Well, I don't care about this.  Heels run wild with slick-looking offense on Darren. Love Titus coming in and DOING THE MILLIONS OF DOLLARS DANCE DURING A BACKBREAKER! KOFI AND HIS SILLY WALKING DANCE came out with his buddies. PTPs taste defeat thanks to the distraction and a back stabber. Time for Miz vs. Show, which HHH doesn't care about despite it having someone who is/was in the Authority. Cole talks about how wrong Miz was to interrupt HHH...isn't Cole a face and HHH a heel? Why is Cole siding with the heel? Show wins with the flying elbow. At least if Show's going to do a flying elbow at this age and his size, it's a finisher. WHY this is a finisher for him or even a thing he's doing, I have no idea. I love Show talking shit to Miz while he literally kicks his ass. Show said he'll kick Ryback's ass and beat up a bunch of folks on Tough Enough too. HHH and Steph met with Rob about his painting on Cena. Kudos to Rob for making it on Raw. They said they'd need half the roster.

And then instantly after the break, HHH and Steph told the roster to shut up and listen to them. Just what Raw needed - more of the roster being made to look weak against HHH and Steph. Heyman talked about Seth. Oh yeah, there's this Seth Rollins guy around too. Heyman cuts a great promo with one big flaw - he talked about Taker selling his soul to get revenge, but we don't know how that line is true just yet. Taker appeared and then Lesnar saved him for a good brawl. Goons couldn't prevent much, but THE ROSTER came down - including Rusev, who should be above this. This is doing a great job of making me excited for Summerslam this Sunday...oh wait.

This greatness continues in the back. Brock's all like "FUCK YOU, TABLE!" and turns that over while diving onto the pile of guys. King Toilet Plunger is holding Brock down. Finally, cops arrive to zip tie Brock. I hope we get a promo of Brock in jail swearing vengeance on Taker - not "we hear that we'll be joined by Brock Lesnar from a local law enforcement facility", but Brock with a bit of a five 'o clock shadow swearing bloody vengeance on Taker. We get an awesome recap of all this while HHH says he didn't have Brock arrested - he wanted to cool Brock off. Seth says that dammit, it's a shame they're gone - he wanted to talk to them. Recap of Bray and Harper leads to a Wyatt promo where he and Harper said little of note.

After a break, it's time for Harper vs. Roman. We get the stat that Roman hasn't won since pinfall or submission (he has submissions?) since this Bray deal. JBL points out that the odds aren't even and then ROMAN'S LITTLE BUDDY DEAN comes down. Back and forth stuff leads to Roman being sent to the floor for a break. POST-BREAK CHINLOCK! Crotch-lift suplex is back - so it's a new regular move from Roman. Roman gets the drive-by, but Bray attacks. Dean helps Roman. Dean's new Dirty Deeds shirt looks like a Word doc printed onto a shirt. Seth sez words next. FANTASTIC Taker-Brock hype vid. Recap of the title match from last night.

Seth talked for a while. Jesus can lightning just strike Seth now. Words words words. He wants Lilian to announce who WOULD have won, and it's Brock by DQ, and then Cena comes out. I'm legit excited for a return to Cena in the WWE Title picture since he's been used so well as the U.S. Champ. Seth had a chance to man up and didn't - so that's the crux of this whole deal. Recap of Mama Steph giving the baby chicks a chance, but with some NXT clips thrown in. Sasha and Naomi face off against Paige and Becky.


Bella commentary is awful, and then JBL talks about this being like the WCW invasion being booked by WWE and that being a huge failure. WHAT IS THIS COMMENTARY!? They're trying to get the Bellas over as both faces and heels. Banks Statement and the crossface get the win. Fun-ish match in-ring wise, horrid on commentary. They put over the training needed to do well in Southpaw and kinda plug TE. Recap of tonight's Taker-Brock stuff.

Recap of the Rusev-Lana story. Oh God - Rusev is now piss break material. Lana says that Dolph is finally talking and Summer show up cosplaying her and Rusev makes out with her while looking at STUPID WITCH WHO CALLS HERSELF LANA. Cesaro has been "absolutely lights out"...what does this mean!? Loved Cesaro running wild with uppercuts. Owens and Sheamus argue due to an apron knockoff. Owens is pissed at him and Rusev too. Rusev is now stuck in a 1-on-3 situation. Rusev's babyface turn continues. Swing into a slingshot RKO gets the win - so now three people have pinned Rusev since Orton did it here.

Screens -

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