Friday, November 29, 2013

WWE SD 11-29-13

Show starts with Vickie cutting a promo from the Thanksgiving party set - UNLIKE ALL OTHER WW PARTIES, THERE WILL NOT BE CHAOS. There's going to be a food eating contest between Khali and Titus. And then that just ends so Axel gets a jobber intro with Ryback. At least he got a theme - Henry didn't even get that. Body block WSS get a quick win. Xavier and Truth were backstage - Xavier was in a Power Rangers shirt looking like a goober. Brodus was a complete dick here. Oh boy. Brodus as a heel after being this silly for so long can't work. Shield gets a tag title shot tonight...why not hype that on Raw? Orton cut a boring promo about the title match at the last PPV and the not-quite-a-unification match on the next one. Ricardo returned in the food fight while AJ and Tamina got thrown out. Titus looked sick, but won. The reward is a match with Cesaro. Wut woah!

THE PLYMOUTH ROCKERS DEBUTED! 3MB with the Rockers theme, and the alternating Al Snow European Champ gimmick is great. It's a shame they weren't in VINTAGE ROCKERS getup here. Any of their ridiculous outfits would've worked. Drew being so into this gimmick works. They're facing THE MATADORS! SHOCKING. But with Torito in the ring. The bull does an awesome tag me tag me tag me foot stomp. Drew was an awesome base for the bull. Double torture rack drop got the win. This was fun. Kofi, the Bellas, and Bryan put over how great the WWE Universe was in all of Europe during the tour. Tons of Funk came out with Brodus in a goofy angel spaceman top. They're facing Team Black Guys. Second rope splash takes out Woods. What in the fuck was this? And then the chicks danced with the fat guys anyway - reluctantly. Punk cut a decent promo about the Shield, the Wyatts, and Bryan kidnapping. Bray then cut a much better promo and Cole said that Bryan was found in a parking lot AFTER RAW, so he's apparently been a missing person for four days in the kayfabe timeline of this show.

TIME FOR THE FOOD EATING CONTEST MATCH! Titus did the dog bark and pretended to shit himself. Cesaro swing got the win...when Darren got in the ring to cause a DQ. Titus puked in JBL's hat with a wacky censor turkey over it. The hat got thrown onto Cole's head and it exposed his Muta bald spot. This was beyond stupid. Raw Rebound covered Alberto being a loser and WWE's medical staff being bad at their jobs. This was basically the last five whole minutes of the match. Big match intro for The Brothers Rhodes against the Shield. Ambrose mocked Cole with a VINTAGE GOLDUST call for the uppercut. Ambrose is great on commentary. Cody missed the moonsault and they showed a fairly unflattering shot of him with an ass stain. Cross Rhodes would've got the win, but Ambrose got I guess it got the win anyway. Punk came down and Vickie made a HOLLA HOLLA SIX MAN! AWESOME half-crab from Cody/Muta lock by Punk spot. Wyatts are out leading to a bigger brawl, and a super-gigantic tag with all of the heels against all of these faces and Rey. Harper and Rowan are so great in there with Rey. Punk and Rowan had decent chemistry too - Rowan's definitely getting better working with good guys for so long. It seems to have helped Reigns a ton over the past year, and it's amazing to think that in a about a year, he's gone from a guy who wasn't fit for TV to being protected in six-mans wisely, to now being poised for a main event singles push. 619 and a GTS to Rowan got the win. Everything involving the Shield was worth watching, but the rest was either nothing, disgusting, or with Brodus, confusing.

Screens -

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