Monday, May 18, 2015

WWE Raw 5-18-15

Payback was a thing, and TONIGHT MIGHT HAVE CENA VS. FINN BALOR! Generic Raw intro starts things off. Steph and HHH come out and Cole says this is their first time on Raw since WM. It sure doesn't feel like it. Cole called last night's main event A CLASSIC. Mid-ring, there's a stand with a velvet cover and what appears to be a belt with its own cover. HHH puts over Seth's win as a big deal last night. Well, it wasn't anywhere near say...Orton-Foley, but it sure...did give Seth a win. Steph says they'll present Seth Rollins: Architect of a Dream tonight. Steph says that Seth's foes will be able to bask in Seth's greatness and go to the BACK OF THA LINE! They give the IC title a mild drumroll and...boy did that not get a reaction.

Steph gets a yes chant and says that yes, he gave up the title - and he'd be seeing her now if he owned a TV instead of chopping wood or picking berries. Then she buries Bryan for his body not holding up. Thank God Steph is married to such a durable guy who would never miss a year for an injury. Chamber video with Cole doing a hype video for HHH inside the Chamber and how great HHH is in the Chamber. So after VACATING THE TITLE DUE TO INJURY, HHH puts over that now the IC Title will be decided in a match that will shorten careers.

Sheamus interrupts, apologizes for doing so, and gets a "you look stupid" chant. Sheamus puts himself over as the guy who ended Bryan's career on SD. Sheamus says they don't need a chamber, just give him the belt - leading to Ryback, who I guess feels he deserves a shot because he lost. Or he can just call Sheamus stupid and talk over Steph. Well, that bodes well for him. Ryback says Bryan ruined his body to become the IC Champion, which sure makes it seem like a waste of his time, and then he calls out Sheamus for a match tonight. Ryback now hates bullies, and he doesn't like Sheamus. HHH is a big fan of these two big guys grunting and he wants to leave the ring them do their thing.

Ryback pounds his chest and Sheamus leaves. Ryback bonks him into the buckle. Ryback gets whipped ribs-first into the barricade. He dominates more for a break. Outside-in clubbering to Ryback. Ryback counters the kick with a powerbomb. Spinebuster gets 2 for the Big Guy. JESUS FUCK poor Sheamus. Ryback picked him up and just chucked his knee right into the announce table. They fight for a while on the floor and Sheamus slaps the ribs to avoid the Shellshock, and then feigns an eye injury to get the ref to trap Ryback and kick his head off. Ryback loses two straight - so he's clearly being prepped for his IC Title run.

 Steph and HHH are backstage in front of their DVDs talking about strong men and then Kane walks in. He says Seth has grown up - cue Seth running in and partying. Dean walks in and says it only took four guys to help Seth win. Dean then says he wants a match with Seth for the title, and Kane says that Seth can decide his opponent. Dean says Kane used to be a monster and he wonders what Paul and Taker would think about him now being a glorified butler. Dean vs. Bray! I hope Dean loses to a Viewfinder tonight.

Renee is mid-ring and introduces THEMANTHATGRAVITYFORGOTTHENEWSENSATIONNEVILLE in the most boring way possible. Neville is an ugly man - he really needs a mask. Anyway, after a minute of words, Bo comes out and calls him the Little Engine That Couldn't. Neville points out that he beat Bo to win the NXT Title, BUT Barrett's out too after they mute the audio for some reason. Anyway, they went to break after a few minutes of nothing beyond some amazing exchanges between Bo and Booker. "Oh Mr. T, come on!"

Barrett gets a post-break kneelock before Neville kicks away at him. Barrett hits a nice knee clip and gets 2. Neville goes for the slow-lifting German, but the knee gives out. He slips up top and eats a bull hammer. Boy howdy did this one but Bo, really. Bo went from doing nothing to this, while Barrett only won due to the injury, and Neville lost. Bo repeatedly attacks the knee of Neville to show him what he should do the next time someone tries to attack him. Cena-Rusev recap and we learn that the open challenge continues and Rusev's reaction is next.

NO ONE IN WWE OR ANY OF ITS FANS THROUGHOUT THE WORLD KNOW WHAT RUSEV SAID!? And then Cole says that WWE's translators know what he said. Rusev says there is no Lana and he knows how to say I Quit. Rusev said he beat Cena so badly that he passed out and then Lana quit. Lana comes out and Rusev tells her that he told her to not come out. Her accent is coming and going with every other word here. She says she cares for him and he says she's weak. She reveals that he said he quit in Bulgarian, so the crowd chanted "you quit" at him. Rusev orders her to leave because no one needs her and he just keeps yelling. This was fantastic. Loved him closing this by yelling RUSEV! They ran down the title match and really made it clear you don't need to see the show because it had very few highlights. Woods is banned from ringside for tonight's tag title rematch. Dean's out to face Bray.


Cole exposits about tonight's Dean-Seth story by literally naming every character and their role in this story. Boy is puke green not a flattering shirt color on Bray. Dean got the Pentagon Jr. arm snapper on, but he didn't do anything with it. The senton off the apron is shown. Bray gets the standing bodyblock and kicks the back on the mat. Bray clocks him during the suicide dive and suplexes him to the floor - nice. Bray gets a post-break chinlock. Crossbody during the break. Booker says Bray hasn't hit a gym for some reason. Double down off a double clothesline on the floor and they come in at 8. Mid-ring fisticuffs as the crowd chants for tables. Dean gets a series of punches and then the rope-trap dropkick. Suicide dive right after Booker talks about how Dean will do anything to kick ass...or rather ENTERTAIN THE WWE UNIVERSE!

They counter finishers and Bray counters the rebound lariat with the SHOTGUN LARIAT! This is a super-fun match. They exchange blows and Dean gets the rebound lariat for 2. Dean gets sent down off a superplex, but avoids eating a senton. J and J distract him and they shove him into Sister Abigail for the win. This match ruled! They announce Nikki-Naomi for the title tonight, and not the PPV. Tag title match is next! I got an ad for the Rumble-DC show and that should be something else.

Tough Enough vids. Love Cesaro's new #2swiss jacket. E and Kofi come out and clap and E talks about defending the tag titles against 5 teams and Kofi does E's old "cuz 3 ain't enough" bit. Cole says that two teams will start and the other teams will be locked inside the bods and released at "regularly-scheduled interviews". Delayed vertical to E from Cesaro. Kidd gets an apron rana that E tries to flip for before the break.

After the break, E has Cesaro in an abdominal stretch. Cole shows the finish from last night's match and Kidd gets a springboard elbow. Cole says that five men have been named for the IC Title match. Truth, Barrett, and Rusev are in the match with Sheamus and Ryback. Kidd gets the sharpshooter, but E saves him. New Day kicks too much chest in the corner and get DQed. Lucha Dragons fly in in new black and pink gear before Los Matadores run into the New Day. Ascension and PTPs come down too. Cole says that there are the teams in the chamber. PTPs lay out Woods. This was a cluster, but should make for a fun match. Austin-Heyman podcast is announced for TV.

ROMAN REIGNS RETURNS after an incredible one show absence on SD. Cena's out for the challenge - yay! Cena says they all have their differences, but they're all proud Americans! Cena as US Champ is just about the best thing they've done for a secondary title in 20 years. The WWE Title is THE title, but the US Title is OUR championship! I love this. IT'S KEVIN OWENS! He gets no reaction. In hindsight, airing an Owens highlight reel under the guise of doing it for the NXT special wouldn't have been the worst idea. Kevin Steen is on Raw as a champion to battle John Cena in a champion vs. champion match. So great.

Kevin says he hurt Sami before Cena could, and on Wednesday, he'll finish what he started. Owens tells Cena he can't give him advice because he's been around longer than him. Kevin says he's a prize fight - but he has one. HA! Kevin just used the challenge to talk shit - I love this. POP UP POWERBOMB TO CENA! Owens grabs the US Title belt, stomps on it, and says YOU CAN'T SEE ME. THIS RULED! If they do this on NXT or better yet, on the EC show, they've made him. IC Title Chamber guys are shown with a mystery man and Dolph comes out.

He's facing Stardust, and Cole comes back with "Hi guys - 1-2-3 WELCOME TO RAW!" and gets buried for it. Dolph squashes Stardust. YAYFUCKOFFSTARDUST! Dolph does a faux-freak bit due to the scar. Cole says the mystery man will be DOLPH ZIGGLER. Well by golly, what a shocker! Lana comes down, and of course, Rusev is in the IC Title chamber match too. This is hurt by them announcing that Rusev is already in the IC Title Chamber match before doing this. She gives Dolph a big kiss, so now Rusev can be jealous and make Dolph tap to the Accolade at the PPV. The crowd wants one more kiss and gets it. So she's now a face - or luring Dolph into a trap. Rusev comes down and LANA SLAPS HIM! Dolph zig zags him before he can hurt Lana! Not sure if Lana and Dolph are a good combo yet, but hey, they're trying something new - better give it some time to simmer and see what they do. Kane tells goobers to make the carpet sparkling and he's disgusted by Rose and Rosa making out.

Harper and Rowan are mid-ring to face Ryder and Fandango. Guess who wins this. Crowd is comatose. Harper gets the loosest Bossman slam ever and they KO Ryder with a chokeslam. Bellas are backstage and Steph talks to them and apologizes to Brie about Bryan. Steph has her go into counseling for her husband's health, but not for her alcohol addiction that is emblazoned across her chest.

Divas tag match from last night gets recapped. Nikki is of course, all smiles after her sister was wronged. They spend a long time either doing bad lockups or avoiding doing moves. This is like the play wrestling I did when I was 10. Nikki sends her to the floor and hits a suicide dive on both. Post-break chinlock by Naomi. Tamina superkicks Nikki to prevent the Rack Attack. Hell of a maine vent here. YAY PAIGE RETURNS! She lets Nikki get the belt and then hits her with Rampaige to a chorus of cheers! Cena-Owens recap! HHH makes Owens-Cena for...some show. Owens says that at Elimination Chamber, he'll fight Cena for the U.S. Title - nice! Love Steen fighting Cena - maybe he can wear a new Cena parody shirt in that match.

They plug the Entourage movie cast on Raw next week.That carpet isn't sparkling  - Mr. Kane isn't going to be pleased. Kane is clapping and not amused. Told you he was pissed about the carpet. Seth and the goons come down. HHH puts Seth over as an NXT Champion and now he's the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. HHH tells him that Seth reminds him of himself - and he loved the Pedigree. HHH demands more words from everyone. I like how much more fun this is thanks to Kane demanding sparkling carpets. Kane says they don't see eye to eye because he's over a foot taller than him. Kane shows a video for him. They recap the Shield's path of destruction and Seth ending it. The cinder block stuff is shown without the curb stomps. TREMENDOUS video for Seth.

Love Noble saying he's from the civilized West Virginia and then Joey gets choked up before DEAN COMES BACK! Dean wants his title shot. Steph tells Seth to get Dean, who gets jumped by the goons. Suplex to Seth on the floor. Seth takes a crazy bump over the announce table into the barricade and a camera guy. Dean pins Seth's head against cinder blocks...which are there for some reason. Steph says he'll get his match if he lets him go. Goons jump him and then he jumps on the pile. Hey, I'm all for Dean getting a main event push - even a surface-level one is better than being on the mid-card treadmill. Seth pedigrees him, so if Dean kicks out of that, it should get a big pop.

Screens -


  1. Hey when you do smackdown this week I think during the show they put up the match card for elimination chamber of the divas title match could u upload that pix with the other screen shot that you put up fr sd

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