Friday, May 24, 2013

WWE SD 5-24-13

LOLing at the intro video focusing on HHH and Brock...who won't be on the show. Also, the Shield won gold at the PPV. OH GOD, Miz TV is starting the show. Miz is going to be versatile...when? He does the same thing all the time. Miz put Fandango over, but the best part here was a kid with a Scott Steiner shirt. Loved Miz accidentally flipping Fandango off during the twirl with Summer. New best part was Dango's subdued "yes" every time Miz said REALLY? to him saying his name properly. Miz knows the between the sports and entertainment. Barrett waited until this went on for ten minutes to come out and be upset about losing on Raw. Loved him saying Fandango would rather tiptoe through the tulips than fight like a real man, then threatened him within an inch of his life. Standing elbow shot, a version of BARRETT'S FINISHER was largely no-sold by Miz, who just hit him with a double-leg afterwards. They came back with a chinlock and a backslide, while Fandango is on commentary. Fandango cued his music during the match, really killing the match. And then it just ended in a minute due to him kicking Miz in the head. This was a real waste of TWENTY MINUTES outside of Barrett elbowing Fandango. Bryan talked to himself while Kane tried to console him by saying that THEY lost the tag titles, and that he lost on Raw. I love Kane trying to make Bryan feel better. Kane's look of confusion during all this ruled.

Got a Cain-Silva ad showing Cain demolishing Brock, WWE's current top draw. ZEB SAID THINGS ON WWE APP! Swagger got a jobber intro here against Bryan. Loved Bryan just bringing the offense immediately. Having him doubt himself really makes the tag titles seem important. Loved him doing his usual kicking combo while Swagger was against the railing. JBL said he held tag titles with Dick Murdoch and Windham...maybe MAYBE the new Blackjacks won the NWA titles during that WWF/NWA deal. Swagger doing the Vader corner splash to the knees...leading to the stomach being sold was weird - although it does give me something to put in his NM moveset.  Zeb putting his head in his hand and shaking his head back and forth after a sick corner dropkick ruled. Gutwrench led to a No Lock, into a Patriot Lock counter. Swagger bomb was met with two feet to the face, then a buzzsaw kick. Then he looked all evil, did a reverse curb stomp over and over into the No Lock. Holy shit, this new super-pissed Bryan rules. Then he kicked some more ass. I love this gimmick, and Bryan doing the YES deal while a fan held up a DANIEL+BYAN=WORKRATE sign. A graphic asked WHO WAS THE LAST MAN a match from five days ago. As if anyone watching this show wouldn't have at least heard the result.

They showed little highlight screens of the match to show the non-finish. The doc's official diagnosis is "Cena is banged up". Wow. Ryback on the ambulance highlights. I liked the whirling siren video effect over Ryback, didn't so much like the close-up of Cena's wacky facial expression on the post-show. Cena-Ryback IN AN AMBULANCE MATCH is offically the main event of Payback. Sandow suddenly didn't approve of THE TRUCK PULL...even though he was there for it. Sandow looks so great in a suit. He also gave the history of the Gordian knot. Sandow mocked Striker for being a substitute teacher, which led to JBL using him as an example for America's education system being so bad. Sheamus, apparently annoyed by all of this bullying, came out to bully Sandow. Sandow's facial expressions here were tremendous. Loved JBL calling "Shemist" a knotsmith, Cole saying it's not a word, and Josh saying neither is "Shemist". Loved Sandow using bolt cutters to solve the knot, then holding it up like a spine in Scorpion's fatality. Sheamus went for a cheapshot, but Sandow LEPT OVER THE TABLE to avoid it. I adore this feud. Then Sheamus threw poor Striker at Sandow. That looked painful. Jericho is up to face Show next, in a match that is happening with no hype and...for some reason or another.

Great HHH-Brock vid - shame it was meant to put over Axel. Josh brought up Show being a past Heyman guy, which seemed a tad odd. Then he compared Jericho to JOHNNY DEPP, which led to the commentary going totally off the rails for a while. Josh said Jericho has a puncher's, he doesn't really do punches. Show hit one of his loudest mid-air chest slap counters ever here. Missed flying elbow led to a Lionsault to the back - nice cahnge there. Double chokelift off the mat led to a sloppy DDT from Jericho. Cole's strained commentary while Jericho TRIED..TO PUT BIG SHOW...ON HIS BELLY...was amusing. Codebreaker on the floor sent Big Show OVER THE TIMEKEEPING BARRICADE to give Jericho a countout win. This was short, but sweet. Show tried to use a chair, but it got used against him. This was an outstanding build for an extreme rules match between the two...shame it happened right after that PPV. This was the strongest Jericho's been booked since returning. Seems like a good time to put him in a secondary title feud since he's got some momentum. Jericho's ENTIRE CHEST was red after that chop. Amazing.

It's bizarre to see WWE hype up Rock's show on TNT, even if it has been over a decade since the Monday night wars.  Travel Channel is just now getting into the Pimp My...genre with ROCK MY RV STARRING BRET MICHAELS. SONIC HAS SHAKES FOR EVERY OCCASION THIS SUMMER. THAT'S SONIC SHAKES. MADE HAND-MADE! Outstanding video for Axel, largely focusing on Heyman and it was aided by clips of Brock limping and Axel's family. Instead of showing HHH bury him by telling him to let the adults talk, they just showed him slapping him. Way better. They played up the dropkick, corner elbow, and grounded elbows as being the key blows to HHH's head. Cole hyped up the sledgehammer shot as being THE big deal. HHH is suffering from "post concussion symptoms", so they basically di the same thing as the Michaels deal, just less believably.

JBL hyped up Heyman bringing us Punk, Brock, and Austin - but didn't mention Taker, so I guess he was told to never do that again. Heyman was amazing putting himself and his clients over - he's so going into the hall of fame, as is Brock according to this at some point. Axel said he did more on Raw than both his father and grandfather ever did...well that's absolutely ridiculous. There's something about this act that doesn't work for me, but I'm not sure if it's just the name, or them now overhyping him by saying he's a first-ballot hall of famer. They're basically setting him up to not be a failure, but an under-achiever based on some of their wording. He faces the ever-mysterious "someone" after the break.

Best of IYH is the #1 sports DVD in the country, so after hyping up Raw as the #1 entertainment show, now they're sports. Must be that "balance of sports and entertainment" Miz talked about. Goddammit, he's facing Sin Cara - which could be great without THE STUPID LIGHTING. Nice fireman's carry and behind the back takedown from Axel. Drop toe hold...okay, generic Fire Pro CAW offense here. Sin Cara looked awesome here. THERE'S ALWAYS ACTIVITY ON THE WWE APP - now with Orton cutting a boring promo on Axel. Heyman's also the only manager to manage three consecutive world champs - I think it went Brock, Show, and Angle. Sliding McGullicutter got the win. Nice finisher. Needs an official name again that is better than that, because it's terrible. Something like Axe Crusher would fit the least as much as McGullicutter did. Sin Cara shined brightly here, Axel didn't really look all that good. Kofi-Ambrose main event is up.

THE WWE SHAKDOWN, PRESENTED BY SONIC SHAKES recapped the U.S. Title win by Ambrose. In theory, seeing Kofi in a main event on TV should be odd, but thanks to this Shield program, it doesn't. Loved the Believe in Ambrose sign, and AMBROSE chants. Great leapfrogs by Kofi - who really makes them his own simply by how he does them. Flying splash bodyblock got 2 for Kofi. TREMENDOUS bump from Rollins to the floor, while Kofi's flying clothesline to Reigns was beautiful. This led to a beatdown and a HOLLA HOLLA 6-MAN TAG PLAYA when Orton and Sheamus came out to help. Impressive tilt a whirl from Sheamus to Reigns started the match off nicely. Cole hyped up Kofi being more aggressive now. I loved Josh calling out JBL for doing his usual 'go to the dressing room and ask em!" bit when they were IN THE RING WRESTLING. Sheamus busting out a regular neckbreaker was new. Shield dominated the match ON THE WWE APP! Loved Rollins immediately tagging himself in after Reigns missed the tackle in the corner. Crowd went batshit crazy when Orton came in. Like crazy batshit crazy. It was amazing. Superman punch to Orton from Reigns looked great as a punch - seemed to mess up Reigns' left ankle though. Josh played it up as an example of a Shield member sacrificing themselves for the greater good. I love that spect of this group and that Josh tied it into that happening. JBL called Sheamus ONE OF THE GREATEST OF ALL-TIME. Wow. Flatliner into the corner stunend Orton. Superplex from Orton stopped Rollins from going for...something off the top. Sheamus has added a little Savage-esque finger twirl to the clubbering spot. Crazy spear ended White Noise, but led to an RKO on the floor. Kofi got tagged in and got the froggy crossbody. Flying front dropkick from Ambrose led to the headlock driver, and the best match on SD in a while. This was the best SD show since the Taker-Ambrose one. Outstanding show overall.

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