Friday, January 24, 2014

SD 1-24-14

George Scott got a tribute graphic at the start of the show. Given that he's not a mainstream name, and even Lou Thesz didn't get one, this was a pleasant surprise. Generic SD intro starts things. According to Josh, WE'RE ON THE DOORSTEP OF THE ROYAL RUMBLE. Good lord. YAY ZEB! Zeb knocked Show for being a coward, which is true. Then he demanded that the clip air of his destruction. Amusing promo giving Show and Rey a wacky name. Show-Brock clips. Diggint Rey's Avatar gear and doing a bunch of stuff on the floor. Show hiptossed both the RAs quickly. 619>KO punch leads to the splash and the win. Nothing wrong with it, but everything about this feels like it's on auto-pilot. Heyman came out and said Brock would destroy Show AND THEN THE REST OF THE WWE UNIVERSE.

Brodus and his new theme got about 2 seconds of an intro before Miz came down. Miz apparently said on the app that he main evented WM two years ago. Actually, it was three. BAD NEWS BARRETT came down and said tonight's main event could be great, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO SUFFER THROUGH BRODUS VS. THE MIZ. Barrett tried to get a Miz is Awful chant I think Miz is a face again. Or a heel since this chant's actually working. Maybe Barrett's a face. Barrett buried them both, then JBL buried Brodus after burying Miz...holy fuck this thing... It's all about the numbers vid. Batista vid is next. Yikes. Tons of filler by 8:30.

Nope - first, it's AJ-Cameron. JBL said that Tamina looked good in icing...hmmm. They said Naomi got married to Jimmy Uso, AND WE CAN SEE THAT STORY PLAY OUT ON TOTAL DIVAS! Distraction finish didn't win - instead it was the Shining DQ Blizzard. Post-match fight led to the dancers winning and getting their theme played. Batista vid had way too much of Steph and Orton's acting. Love Ambrose's promo about DREAMS HAPPENING IN WWE...except for this year because the Shield's in the Rumble. Love the look Ambrose shot Reigns when he said he'd win the Rumble and main event WM. Roman's GIANT SMILE was hilarious.

RYBAXEL or AXELBACK are out to face the Matadores. This black and gold trim gear looks fantastic. JBL called Torito both a cow and a horse. Josh said the bull looked concerned, which JBL buried until Josh said it was body language that showed him. Nice flying stuff by one of the bullfighters, then a snap arm-lock DDT. Schoolboy distraction finish get the win for Axel! Ryback went from a possible Goldberg match to selling for a bull-suited midget. Punk sez words next.

Long recap of the entire Kane-Punk deal, which wasn't needed how forgettable this whole thing really is. Punk's gonna look the lion in its face on Sunday and PUNCH IT IN ITS STUPID FACE! Kane came out and slowly read his calculation of what chance Punk has to win. It's 1 in 500 a field of 30. Bryan-Wyatt recap. PTPs are mid-ring, Wyatts teleport to kill them. This lasted maybe a minute. D-Young laid out with Sister Abigail. Bryan came out and got the crowd to exhibit a sign of life at 9:20. Bryan's promo outshined Bray, saying that he won't be trapped in Bray's prison of madness - Bray will be trapped in his. Hype for THE BIGGEST CHAMPIONSHIP REMATCH IN HISTORY. Good lord does that feud have no traction. Fandango faces Kofi next.

Kofi, who less than two weeks ago beat the WWE World Champion clean, got a tepid reaction. Nice inset promo from Kofi. JBL said that Kofi's win was an upset, but not the biggest of all-time. Fandango went for a Pele kick and...did something sort of resembling that somewhere close to Kofi. Trouble in Paradise wins it. Cena-Orton hype is up next. The TLC recap was pretty good, but man did Steph's statement of ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT MATCHES IN THE HISTORY OF WWE OR PRO WRESTLING come off as so hollow. Heels came out and they hyped this as being a combination of WWE's two biggest factions...kinda sorta sure. Josh begged #TENMANTAG to trend, and JBL buried him for writing it down that specifically. Jimmy Uso used the Bubba Bomb, which his wife used earlier. JBL put over the Outlaws as having beaten the Dudleys, the APA, and the Hardys. They talked about Cody having a strange way of thinking, dating back to his IC Title run "restoring the prestige" of the title. Seth and Cody TEASED A SUPERPLEX TO THE FLOOR, which thankfully wasn't done. Moonsault onto Reigns from Cody. Goldust and the Road Dogg had a fun exchange. Nice super rana onto Billy. Seth's flying knee prevented the final curtain. Spear to Big E. Dive onto Rollins. Billy hits the famouser on the other Uso. Disaster kick, then the pumphandle to Cody. Schoolboy led to a big brawl and a DQ. Bunch of geeks came down and joined in because why not. Punk came down, did some bionic elbows and...yeah that was an ending. Total nothing show.

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