Saturday, March 12, 2016

WWE Roadblock 2016


This Week in WWE is such a fun way to catch up on Raw without actually watching it. Very tempting. Ambrose-HHH hype video really puts Ambrose over nicely. Really basic house show set for the show here. NEW DAY ROCKS to start. Booty Os skit. More of WWE's comedy that doesn't make anyone laugh.If you don't eat your Booty Os, you'll be booty like ADR, a king without a kingdom like Barrett, and you'll look stupid like Sheamus. Are Sheamus and Barrett tossing loser dust on New Day? Sheamus, WHO WAS WWE CHAMPION TWO MONTHS AGO, is now in the opener of a WWE Tag Title match.

Strange audio issues throughout this. And also, some moves. Nothing really special here. Winds of Change gets 2. Thank God, a chinlock.Wacky facebuster on the floor from Kofi to Sheamus and the Big Ending wins. A new Microphone-Holding Human debuts and Heyman cuts a promo on Bray. AJ-Jericho recap leads to Jericho coming out. Jericho crushed BYRON SAXTON'S dreams. I thought he turned heel by attacking AJ? I LOVE HIM FOR THAT!
Jericho calls Canadians slow and says AJ STYLES, EH!?" He's also Canada's greatest icon - and he's upset about that, and glad he moved away! He says that Canada stinks and Toronto is the anus. Shouldn't that be eh'nus? He gets a big "asshole" chant here. He says that AJ's just a flavor of the month, while Jack Swagger was. Well, that sure sounds like a Roadblock match. Not much to this match. CM Punk chant breaks out. Swagger avoids the Walls, but eats it again and loses while JBL chants YOU STILL GOT IT!

NXT Tag Title match is up with The Revival's name FINALLY being explained - they're the cause of the revival in tag team wrestling in NXT.  E&C 2K16 got a nice pop instantly and the sing a long promo. Enzo's hair is a 25 on the Enzo's Hair scale. Enzo and Cass are fucking OVER. Jesus. Every single thing they do gets a pop. Crazy rocket launcher over the floor onto of the champs. Cass's offense is over and Cole calling all of his wacky move names kinda worked. Carmella is used as a prop to post Cass, and then the double team codebreaker hits on the floor before they do it to Cass off the top to win.
Nattie cuts a promo on Charlotte - she dedicates the match to Bret, and we get the Flairs being all wacky and pissy. They have their usual really good technical match. Figure 4 is met with slaps by Nattie. Nattie reverses it. Natural Selection gets 2, as does a Liger bomb by Nattie. Nattie gets a sharpshooter, but Ric helps Charlotte and A DISTRACTION SCHOOLBOY WINS with kinda the ropes.

Brock-Bray recap. Bray promo about how destructive Brock is - he beat Rock, he beat Taker, BUT HE'S NEVER FACED BRAY WYATT! Bray comes out and we get Bray and Luke versus Brock now - so it's just their regular house show match now. So great to see Brodie Lee in big-ish matches against stars you never thought he'd have. Shoulders in the corner before a German. Discus lariat into a chinlock leads to A GERMAN FROM BROCK. German. F5. Win for Brock. WWE legit advertises Brock vs. Bray and delivers Brock vs. Harper. Well, it made for a better match more than likely. 
Sami is out to face STARDUST!? After several thousand years, Sami beats Stardust. TWO MONTHS INTO THE REIGN, we get to see HHH wearing the gold and it looks awesome on him. They got a big-time intro and this really felt like the main event of WM. Lots of headlocks and matwork to start - nice surprise here since the build would seem to indicate tons of brawling. Dean runs wild with punches and dives to the floor before slamming HHH's knee into the post. Batista Bite from HHH - not the Rings - that was a double armbar, the Bite had the crossface in there. Dean locks on a figure 4. Better sharpshooter than Rock by Ambrose. Dean GETS THE DIRTY DEEDS! 2.9...but DEAN'S FEET ARE UNDER THE ROPE! HHH goes for a schoolboy with the ropes - but the DIVAS TITLE FINISH ISN'T ENOUGH FOR DEAN AMBROSE. Dean dives to the floor onto HHH. Crazy diving standing elbow to the floor. Another one off the barricade through the table. KickWhamPedigree for the win. Well, that's what I expected - but I'm disappointed.

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