My mother's birthday was a fantastic day full of productivity and generally feeling pretty good. Now it's time to skim through SmackDown which I honestly couldn't give a shit less about. I didn't bother watching it before the usual airing, or during the SyFy airing - there's just nothing to care about on the show, but maybe this episode will be different.
Show starts with the Edge and Christian beatdown and Authority return, and then them coming out. Edge is putting Cesaro over with his shirt tonight after doing the same for Zayn on Raw. They came out and talked. And talked, and talked some more about a lawsuit. A BIG LIMO came in and TINY JAMIE NOBLE came out! AWESOME! J and J came down to deliver a document, with a theme song as you're want to do. Mercury rattled off a big deal about it and Edge reminded them that they're in control, so he made them face THE BIG GUY! 15 minutes in, Edge talks about their show starting now. Rowan faced Bray, who bumped around great for him. Bray won, so Rowan's beneath even Bray - and given that Bray technically main evented last month's show, he shouldn't feel like a low-midcard act. Bray said that if he's willing to do that to someone he loves, what will he do to Dean? Well, that worked for me.
J AND J DID A FIVE SECOND POSE! Goldust, Stardust (can fuck off), and Adam Rose are in a 6-man against Truth and the Usos. Everyone does stuff, Stardust gets the Falling Star on the floor (poorly) and a Samoan superkick party and Superfly dive win it. Show faced Ryback in a nothing match until Rusev came down and distracted him leading to a KO punch and countout win. Ryback fights back with a Meathook. Edge tricked Noble into going into DA WOMEN'S BAFROOM. The Factual Supermen faced the Matadores. Ricola Bomb blockbuster double team move wins for Cesaro and Kidd. Loved the giant swing>dropkick combo too. Ambrose beat up Axel and left on an Ambulance. Ascension killed Rhett Titus and some other dude.
Edge and Christian defaced HHH's magazine. Rusev faced Roman, who debuted a new swank running jumping schoolboy cradle. Shame they took those out of the WWE games because it was done perfectly here like it is in those. Roman got the win by DQ here after Show came down after a spear, so Rusev looked a bit weak here, but Roman looked strong beating him by DQ and then demolishing Show with the announce table to get revenge for Raw. Solid show all around.
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