Monday, September 22, 2014

Raw 9-22-14

The opening recap did a mix of stills and video from the NOC match, focusing on the AAs and feigned cash-in. Cena's new gear looks really easy to replicate in FPR. Dean comes out while a fan holds up a MOX EXPLICIT VIOLENCE sign and Dean says I'M NOT DEAD! Jon Moxley is starting off Raw by DEMANDING THAT CLIPS OF HIM GETTING KILLED air just for him - because he likes replaying it in his mind. What an awesome man. Cena came out seconds into Dean's sit-in with his full getup on, but BLACK SHORTS CUZ HE'S MAD. Cena bitched about stuff. Cena's horrible promo work stands out more after hearing Ambrose's subdued work. The Authority came out, furthering this whole feeling of Ambrose being the only sane man in this universe. Dean and Seth brawled. MICHAEL COLE'S SUIT! Holy shit. Black with white checker trim. More brawling. LOOKITLOOKITLOOKITLOOKITLOOKITLOOKITLOOKIT! Seth stole a car and Dean got in the back for a second and was thrown out of it taking a hard bump on the concrete - that could've gone badly. This was really good stuff overall.

Opening recap and we're getting Cena-Orton. Miz and Mizdow are out - Mizdow has a replica IC belt - nice touch. Shitty replica though. Dolph's out with no stunt double. Dolph chose to cash in his rematch quickly, and with no help - nice to see him be a face with that. They did some basic stuff until Miz did an apron neckbreaker for an ad break. Miz dominated after the break with the corner clothesline, but he ate a perfect dropkick to counter a double sledge. Dolph gets a Stinger splash and a neckbreaker. Dolph counters the back/neckbreaker into the jumping DDT for 2. This is several billion times better than the PPV match. Dolph jumped off the second rope into a figure four setup. LOL @ Sandow doing the figure four motions on the floor. Dolph counters the running boot with a schoolboy for 2, and a fameasser for 2.5. Dolph superkicks Mizdow, leading to the same finish as last night BUT DOLPH COUNTERED WITH THE TIGHTS AND WON! It was poetic justice. This was so much better than the PPV match. According to King, "He who pulls last pulls best!" This feud has really helped everyone involved, and it's amazing that happened given how flawed it's been at times.

Bo's out to face Swagger again. They do stuff until an electric chair drop into an ankle lock. This was a match. Loved Zeb doing WE BOLIEVE...that you tapped out with his voice cracking. Dutch gets another highlight in Memphis! Eric the Actor gets a tribute - nothing for Michael Moody. Summer Lay's out to face Nattie and Rosa. So Summer's a heel this week. Summer did a "spinning leg kick" according to King, and they buried her for retweeting her own tweets. They badly-timed the spinning clothesline with tons of light being shown. Summer takes the sharpshooter and Nattie wins. Okay then.

Opening recap...with Superstars graphics. Okay then.  Dean's out to face Kane in the hour 1 main event. They did moves for a bit, but Dean got Dirty Deeds and Seth jumps Dean! He takes him out for a bit, runs, stands on the ramp and Dean...doesn't go after him and instead chooses to toss chairs out of the ring. That's a bit weird. Seth, Kane, and HHH had a chat until DEAN JUMPED THEM! HHH wanted them to toss Dean out, but Steph said that never works - THROW HIM IN A ROOM! I demand a skit with Dean sneaking through an air duct.

Sheamus and the Usos are out for a 6-man tag. Cole paid tribute to Connor - there's going to be an auction with some hand-signed Steph gear from Summerslam. Gold and Stardust came out with the belts - Goldust wears his around his waist, while Stardust has his over his shoulder and chest like a bandoleer. Cesaro hopped up on the apron and got no intro. Nothing here is bad, but the crowd is dead. Big hopping headbutt by an Uso gets 2. JBL buries Dusty for being old, and then calls the Outlaws old too. Clubbering time - Cole referenced beam me up, Scotty in 2014. Cesaro takes Sheamus out on the floor AND TAKES A BOW! Goldust gets the Finial Cut on an Uso, but Sheamus saves. Samoan Superkick Party sets up a dive and a win for the good guys! This wasn't bad, but it was lacking compared to either of the PPV matches involving these guys.

Orton did a little weightband exercise, while Seth told him that he appreciated Orton facing Cena tonight. Seth MAY have a surprise for him at ringside, and he and Kane will watch the match at ringside. So we'll get a last-second save of Cena by Dean during a cinder block spot tonight. Henry's upset backstage and he'll come out next. 2K15 next generation ad is a good one, minus "Bawitdaba." Henry's out and they recap his loss. Henry said that tonight, the fans can make fun of him as a response to the what chants - nice way to fit things into the story. LANA'S OUT IN WHITE. Holy Hell! Lana faking a hillbilly accent while doing a Russian one is impressive. We're getting a Henry-Rusev match tonight!

Miz TV has Ambrose on it tomorrow night. How very odd. They do stuff for a bit before Henry tosses Rusev into the steps! Vader bomb attempt leads to Rusev pulling him down and STOMPING THE MAT! Henry takes the Accolade and passes out, which is a perfect finish for his character. It looks like they realized the tapout hurt him, so they did this. With the medal gimmick, they really should bring in Kurt to face Rusev at WM. Night of the Living Ambrose recap. Adam Rose and the Bunny wrestle next. Bunny-Slater/Gator recap, so I guess that's who they're facing.

JBL points out that it's odd for a bunny to get a wrestling license. They mentioned this only being slightly odd in Memphis, and Lance Russell got a plug! Love Lance Russell getting some love here - he really should commentate a match here. What the hell, why not - give him ONE MATCH as a commentator for WWE. Titus comes in and just tosses Rose around like it's nothing. Bunny got the tag, came in with a flying karate kick, a missile dropkick, and then did a jumping spin kick before tagging Rose in for the Party Foul. This was goofy and fun. They begged people to do #bunnymania.

Now we get WWE burying THEIR OWN CUSTOMERS in graph form. Nikki cuts a promo on Brie. The worst part about this is it could lead to Brie coming out to respond. Nikki demanded Brie come out - so she is the heel. Brie came out from '94 with a flannel shirt as a skirt. Nikki and Brie talked over each other to ensure they memorized the script. Nikki said Brie is an embarrassment to THE BELLA NAME. Why? It's not their real name. Nikki insulted the ugly, broken-down troll. Wow. AJ's out because she's facing Nikki, which we're just now learning about.

FS1 ad...hmm...I wonder if TNA has a chance with them. TNA does actually pull in better ratings than UFC now. Paige is out on commentary, saying that AJ's not her friend for taking her title. AJ got 2 off of rolling neckbreakers. Nikki did a weird move where she pushed AJ's stomach into the ropes, then rubbed her ass into AJ's to damage her stomach. Okay then. Swinging sleeper from Nikki. Nikki gets the cross armbreaker after doing the ass on the shoulder armbreaker thing. AJ sits up top for a century before Nikki gets into position for the Black Widow.

SmackDown 15 is coming in October. Usos-Dust Bros rematch on SD. They showed the covered up cinder blocks. Or it's Dean in a box. Heels are out followed by Cena in a dark blue Keep Calm and Never Give Up. They did moves. Went to a break. Orton got 2 off a clothesline. Kings says the box is bigger than the first one. DUN DUN DUN. Cena eats a back suplex on the announce table, here in a nothing TV match. Draping DDT off the top gets 2 for Orton. Cena counters the RKO and locks on the STF, before a Rollins DQ. Cena tried to defy the odds, but he ate a kick and chokeslam. Kane undid the box, revealing AMBROSE! "C'MERE YA SON OF A BITCH!" Dean rules. Ambrose dives on the pile! A Titty Master sign just made TV. AA to Kane, and Seth leaves. Dean is ready for the main event mix, unlike Roman, and the fans want it too.

Screens -

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