Wednesday, September 10, 2014

TNA Impact 9-10-14 - 9/11 Tribute Show

The 9/11 show being moved to a day earlier is a bit odd, but not too bad - it serves as a reminder of what happened. JB introduced a color guard presentation and some moron yelled out CM Punk to start it. A JB voice over introduces Chris Melendez. Chris slaps hands with all of the fans, kisses his girlfriend, and hugs his dad - a Vietnam veteran. Chris has really awesome camo and American flag tattoos. Tenay puts over Chris making his in-ring debut at the Manhattan Center, nearby where he grew up in Spanish Harlem. Taz puts over how hard it is for guys with two legs to make it, let alone one. Melendez is already smoother and more veteran-like than either Velvet or Rosa. Ion chop blocks the good leg, but loses to a Samoan drop. This wasn't the greatest match ever or anything, but TNA's got something with him. Since 3D trained him, we get a recap of the tag title series's first match.

Roode's out to cut a promo on Lashley, who he faces next week despite the hashtag being #RoodeVsLashley so far. Also, next week's show is No Surrender. There are fans opposite the hard camera dressed like '80s suit Flair, Savage, and a woman dressed as the Ultimate Warrior. A guy in the front row is wearing a Best For Business shirt - so they at least sold one of those. Lashley, MVP, and King are out. Taz put over the Bellator win, which they'll show later. MVP's in new black and yellow gear. I loved MVP's promo about how Roode wanting a movie story with a happy ending - but he can't, because his reality is a battle with LASHLEY. MVP is just perfect in this role - the knee injury was a huge blessing in disguise because he really shouldn't be in the ring, but Lashley has excelled in this role as champion, while MVP has become the second-best manager in the business. Roode and his stupid mohawk had the nerve to talk to Lashley, and it results in him eating a beating before EY and Joe make a save. And talk. And yell. We're getting a holla holla 6-man tag next.

 Joe starts this with a big dive. MVP comes in and attacks EY. MVP's new back logo looks good. EY's bacne is just disgusting. Lashley hit a sweet floatover snap suplex for 2. MVP did a nice jumping knee. Lashley got a cross armbar on EY. Roode tags in with a flying forearm, and Lashley flips hitting Joe with the spear. Roode avoids the drive by, and hits the DVD for the win. This was fine. BFG ad. Brittany asked Gunner if Shaw's seeing anyone - Gunner responds "a therapist". HA. Bro Mans and BPs are out in matching gear! Tenay put over Tinder, while Taz called it Cinderella. Rebel, Steve, and Knux are going to face the Bro Mans and one of the BPs. Rebel's ass is still amazing. Velvet is working the match. Taz asks how long it will take them to fund this damned carnival, and Tenay says it's a big carnival. Velvet's ass is stealing the show on the apron. Tenay and Taz are just joking around on commentary, and it's fantastic. Taz says he did yoga, leading to Tenay talking about his cigar smoking. They referenced Tito, Ron Simmons, and Gene Simmons on commentary, and Rebel's ass in a thong was revealed on the finish and Velvet bumped on hers to take a slam. Christ is she terrible.

 Team 3D's backstage and vowed to end the series tonight in their hometown, in their specialty match. Angle cuts a promo on how great the roster is, but he's had issues with EC3. EC3 said he'd dish out vigilante justice due to what happened to Dixie, and that he took Kurt out twice before and will do it again if he doesn't get what he wants. Kurt promised to kick his ass when the time is right. Kurt says he's fair and knows EC3 isn't dressed to wrestle - but he is dressed for a street fight! I would love to see someone in pink slacks in an actual fight. Crowd chants for EC3 to change his pants after a ramp suplex and random weapon stuff. Low blow from EC3 after some cane shots. Can to the head of Rhino. EC3 takes off his pearly white belt and whips Rhino. Crowd's chanting for EC3 and we get a chop exchange. Rhino misses the gore into the can, eats a Nakamura knee mid-ring, and hits the 1%er on the chair for the win. Great showcase for EC3. EC3's back is all welted up with cane shots - this was a great way to come off as more than just a pussy. It's nowhere near Orton-Foley, but a step in that direction. KO calendar cover reveal is next.

Melendez's debut is recapped, and he talks about his child's mother seeing him, alongside his father. He considers himself an inspiration, and if you train and don't take no, you can overcome anything. KOs are mid-ring for the reveal. This is like a wacky mid-card SD thing from '03. Love stole the mic, and JB was greatly offended. Velvet got the cover. Dun dun dun! HAVOK GIVES NO FUCKS ABOUT A CALENDAR. She's got prey all lined up mid-ring, but Gail goes to attack and gets beaten. Taryn's boob window and Madison are shocked, and Havok grabs the gold. Storm went to his shed, with Sanada in full getup to brainwash Manik, also in full getup. He tries to rip the mask off, but Manik is opposed to this...despite being unmasked voluntarily backstage many times. Anyway, The Revolution faces Tajiri and Aries next.

But first, Lashley clips and a Bellator plug. The Revolution came out first, and Sanada's paint now finally matches the getup. Aries and Tajiri came out, and wow does Tajiri just look awful. He can still move relatively quickly though - but he's definitely lost a few steps. Tenay talked about the HOF induction for Bully and Devon, so they must've made a deal, or they're just keeping it alive in VO form since they're still an active team as of the taping. Aries and Sanada are still great together, but Sanada's a bit too much of a Muta cosplayer in this match. Tajiri gets the tarantula on both guys at points, but gets the beer mist and then eats the kneeling superkick for a loss. This was fine, but nothing special. Hardys are backstage, and Jeff's dressed like a dreamsicle. Matt put over their Royal Rumble 2000 victory at MSG - available now on the WWE Network! Gail and Havok brawled, and they went to a break.

After the break, they're brawling to the ring. Goons broke it up, but HAVOK CHOKESLAMMED DUDES. They ran down the NS card - a KO battle royal sets up the BFG title match, while Joe-Homicide, and Roode-Lashley are set. 3D's out first, followed by the Hardys - Jeff's got a black and pink top on with his orange and white paint. Taz butchered Kurt's title and hoped to avoid a fine. Wassup hits, and Bully gets the big Dusty sendup. Davey and Jeff bonk heads on a corner forearm spot. Eddie got the machine gun chops and a huge chant, while the doomsday device was botched horribly with Devon making no contact but Eddie taking it anyway. Bully avoids Air Hardy and goes through the table, so it doesn't count. A fan had a Big Gold and TNA World title replica side-by-side - the TNA World Title really looks better in that form than the Big Gold, and it looks like a more modern version of it too. Wolves double dive onto the pile, which they use to segue into an Evel Kneivil doc after the show. Jeff makes a table bridge with the legs up! Eddie dove over it, making it even dumber because if he fell short, yikes. Eddie avoids 3D, but busts the table - which doesn't count since his own momentum did it. Wolves get knocked down by Bully and Jeff. Swanton off the top through a table on one of the Wolves wins. Well, that came out of nowhere. They replayed it a few times, and Eddie was the victim. Hardys climb a ladder and name a DOOMSDAY CHAMBER OF BLOOD MATCH! Nah - ladder match, at No Surrender.

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