Orton and Seth had an evil meeting with Kane about all they did to the good guys on Raw, and talked about destroying Jericho and Reigns tonight. Orton's goofy emoting here was funny. The new Slim Jim ad is just stupid. If you buy Slim Jims, hot women will do things, whereas buying IMPOSTER MEAT STICKS makes you fodder for fat, hairy guys. Bo faces Justin Gabriel, with new gear that looks a bit less cool than his last black, red, and white stuff but still nice. Zeb and Swagger are at ringside, but not doing commentary. Chuckled at Bo cutting a promo right after the bell rang and naming himself America's sweetheart. Zeb cut a promo on Bo, IF THAT IS HIS REAL NAME. And if he's inspirational, HE'S ARIANA FRIGGING GRANDE, AND HE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THAT IS! JBL lost his shot at that. Real Americans don't need to be Bo-Lieve, they need to say WE THE PEOPLE! JBL and Cole talked about Ariana Grande, how to say her name, and making fun of how old they are. Gabriel got a nice legsweep. Bodog wins, and Swagger's angry about dat wittle putty tat. Loved JBL calling Swagger Biff, leading to Cole saying Bo's going Back to the Future.
Summer and Layla get no intro. AJ's out for commentary while Paige faces Summer. AJ's got her wedding ring on. I like Layla dancing on the floor while Summer does a wacky headscissors. I love how AJ puts the title over as the most important thing in the world. Paige does the Black Widow perfectly for a win. JBL said that Paige stole her skip, title, and craziness - so AJ stole the Paige Turner! A Z Nation ad airs that is crazy-violent and has no place on this show.
A detailed Henry-Rusev recap airs. Cole does a giant intro to further kill time, plug the PPV, and the WWE Network - which the fans plug with the $9.99 bit. Henry's B-roll is now the American flag without all of Swagger's stuff like they did before. Loved the pure rage in Mark's eyes when Rusev came out. JBL brings up some arm wrestling documentary with a Russian who won the competition and WAS A FRIEND OF RUSEV! JBL puts over wrestling arm wrestlers like Rude and Scott Norton! Shocked he didn't plug that you could watch Norton on the WWE Network for only $9.99. I like the little touch of them having each guy's flags in their corner. Lana talking shit to Henry was an entertaining visual - LOLed at her bringing up Henry failing at the Olympics, and then him calling her Goldy Locks. Henry said he pulled out due to an injury, but HE NEVER THOUGHT HE'D BE ABLE TO REPRESENT HIS COUNTRY, THE SUPERPOWER KNOWN AS AMERICA! And at Night of Champions, he'll unleash 400 pounds of fury! LEMME SHOW YOU WHAT I DO! Henry rules.
Ref gets technical telling Rusev to "put your hand on the thing". Henry-Rusev do an arm wrestling bit and Henry wins, leading to Lana demanding a redo with the left arm. Henry being the brave American accepts. Henry was winning, but Lana threw powder in the face and RUSEV CRUSHED. This went on for a long time, but was always entertaining. I loved Cole, the babyface, being greatly offended by this. I need to give Rusev the buzzsaw kick in FPR. This Rusev act is so great - it's gotten over so much better than I could've expected, and he's improving quickly month by month - they lucked into this whole thing to some degree, and are making the most of it. Y2J bullshitted with Renee about being in ONE OF THE GREATEST RAW CAGE MATCHES EVER AND FLYING OFF THE 25 FOOT HIGH CAGE!
Miz and Mizdow were wacky backstage. Then they came out and TWIRLED TOGETHERLOLed at JBL saying he's NOT GOING TO BRING UP MIZDOW SPRAY-PAINTING MIZ'S POSTERIOR, followed by Dolph and R-Ziggler. Truth's got good legs. I like Dolph giving Truth the IC Title. This is quite the goofy tag match. Shocked they didn't do this joke on Raw. Truth gets the flying elbow for 2 on Mizdow. JBL goes on and on and on about who took the photos. Tom theorizes it could be the makeup artist from Raw - there we go, perfect. Good going Mr. Robot Man. The commentary throughout this match was purely the guys entertaining themselves, and was fantastic as a result. Love Miz stealing Dolph's goofy hip thrusting. DOLPH DID TRUTH'S THRUSTS AND THE PUNCH, while Truth did the Zig Zag and Dolph got the win - this was amusing, and Truth worked perfectly in this role. There's some mileage in this R-Ziggler gimmick - there's really no good reason to not throw Truth in the IC mix too. They plugged Z Nation and Cole said he'd watch it backstage - while JBL said he'd join him if he had pizza. Bella recap took ages - I was able to flip over to Bellator when it was announced, and then when I came back to SD, the first round was half-over.
Nikki talked about the Springer deal. Nikki's robotic acting was awful, but still better than whatever Brie's acting is. AJ cut a promo on Nikki weaseling her way into the match, and Paige stole the show by ALWAYS messing up Nikki's name, being all goofy afterwards, and saying she'll beat AJ so they can be buddies again, pumpkin. She's excelling in this role. Jericho's out, and they recapped the Orton-Jericho bit from Raw. Jericho's at least got the knee taped up here after DIVING OFF A CAGE and having his knee mangled by both Bray and Orton. Jericho and Roman faced Orton and Kane. Seth's had this theme for months, it's heard multiple times a week, and I still can't remember who's coming out when it hits. Orton's intro killed more time. Everyone did moves for 10 minutes, with Roman getting his basement kick to Orton. Jericho tagged in and got 2 off a flying crossbody off the top, and Jericho won with a schoolboy on Orton after countering the draping DDT - I liked that a lot.. Roman looked good with what he did, but he's not doing anything new. Jericho's win should have been played up as a big deal, instead he just "pulled a rabbit out of the hat." This wasn't the best show ever, but it was an easy watch.
Screens -
http://www.imagebam.com/gallery/cer0uofvntt90yy9pb48fb17fsbtlpzx
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